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Joined:  Oct 2000 Posts: 35,996 Member |  
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Oh, I forgot to add something ..... |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
| Member Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 | 
I see the point.understood NC the outside friends.it was just good to get the other perspective .my intentions were not to have a comeback or rekindle old romance. But it was stepping out of the box.Now onto the real task im going to meet with lawyer again.I have something bouncing in my head.its the house.now I have 50% stake in this.I feel that with all I know about the plans WW was haveing. To move OM in here and be daddy im thinking that this house should be sold were we both will not live here.I know it sounds mean or evil but she was going to burn me if I never
 found out.any input on the house?
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Joined:  Jan 2009 Posts: 843 Member |  
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She can't put you out, She will have to go through the whole process of the divorce. Her greatest weapon was surprise. That weapon is as dangerous as a 2 week old banana now.  So her plans now have the reality that you are not some sucker who is going to lose his house or his car to some POSOM.  The other point is, you are so far ahead in the game of protecting yourself. Again, tell her the kids should live with you. Tell her to "be reasonable and think of the kids". Tell her "why should they suffer because their mom can't keep her vows or her panties up". 
Last edited by ouchthathurt; 01/19/12 03:32 PM.
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Joined:  Jul 2010 Posts: 4,653 Member |  
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In a divorce, the house issue would be settled.  One of you could buy out the other and refinance or sell the house and split the proceeds/cost...it would depend on what you guys negotiated. A more pressing matter would be who is paying for the house right now.  Is she carrying her share of the bills? 
 Me (BH)
 FWW
 Married 2000, DS 8, DD 6, DD 2
 
 
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Joined:  Apr 2005 Posts: 10,179 Member |  
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it was just good to get the other perspective .It just felt  good. 
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
 ~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Joined:  Sep 2006 Posts: 517 Member |  
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Ugh... I made the mistake of **talking** to other women while i was separated and lonely.
 
 I ended up having a RA, don't kid yourself that you can resist your taker.
 
 He's a crafty lil b@st@rd he is..
 
 Don't chance it, avoid those situations at all costs.
 
 
 
 
 FBH 34 me,FWW 34,
 DS 14, OC-D 12 (given up for adoption), DS-8, DD-5
 D-Day#1 10-12-1998
 D-Day#2 2-10-2008
 Recovered!
 
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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I agree as a friend told me WW believed I would be so upset that I would just pack my bags and leave.friend told me little did she know that when im crossed I can be a real well let's just say hard to deal with   .funny its like I said friends know me better my W.I sent a text asking to at least have the kids here to sleep in their own bed.still haven't heard anything .the other thing im wondering if she went to a lawyer why was she not advised to return home? Something well many things do not make any sense. I could sit here and make a list of all the things that don't fly in what she is doing.very strange how she is thinking not the woman I fell in love with at all completely different in every way. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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Just a thought you guys should know me by now.WW has taken 2 weeks off from work and im wondering if I should contact the female coworker that we went to her wedding 2 yrs ago? Just ask her some Q's about OM and WW.I believe the damage is done but just curious if she would tell me anything.also should I still contact WW boss? |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2009 Posts: 843 Member |  
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As a courtesy you may call the boss, and thank him for her time off, then you can just say: "Yeah, its so sad about the MRS and the POSOM.  Must make it real hard to work with all the drama. Just to remind him that he has employees going out in their cars and schtuping during lunch. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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Found out WW did retain a lawyer and filed.looks like she beat me to the punch.oh well mine will be retained tomorrow oh wait today. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Aug 2005 Posts: 4,554 Member |  
|   Member Joined:  Aug 2005 Posts: 4,554 | 
Found out WW did retain a lawyer and filed.looks like she beat me to the punch.oh well mine will be retained tomorrow oh wait today.Not unexpected.  It's important that she hold on to the likely portrayal of you as this "abusive husband" that she needs to get away from.  Hence the suggestions that you take the initiative from her and file first.  As her next step, she's likely going to try and have you removed from your home. 
 ManInMotion
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 (see "MiM's Story" for more details)
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Joined:  Jan 2009 Posts: 843 Member |  
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Don't know how successful she will be, if Eds been carrying his VAR.  I think he is being set up for an RO. He needs to be very careful. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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That has been discussed my lawyer stated she would need undeniable proof of abuse that she does not have.thus the reason I removed my are and personal items from this home in case she came at me with an RO or a OP.lawyer told me raising your voice does not constitute grounds for RO. Ill find out more inabout an hour. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Aug 2005 Posts: 4,554 Member |  
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That has been discussed my lawyer stated she would need undeniable proof of abuse that she does not have.Unfortunately I've seen a few cases where the poor BH has been thrown out of here for a lot less than that. 
 ManInMotion
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 (see "MiM's Story" for more details)
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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Got done with lawyer he looks like wait until I get served than go from there said let her spend the money.also said if an OP or RO is used its to late as it should I have been done before filing a D he said she is going about this wrong she and out of normal thinking. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jul 2010 Posts: 4,653 Member |  
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Have you heard from her family at all or has everyone taken sides?
 
 
 Me (BH)
 FWW
 Married 2000, DS 8, DD 6, DD 2
 
 
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
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Haven't heard from anyone in the family tried to contact BIL wife nothing. Looks like they have been brainwashed and NC.nothing from the kids not to even my son which I find very hard to swallow he was the only one I thought could get through to her.I guess I was wrong. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 Member |  
| Member Joined:  Jan 2012 Posts: 81 | 
Anyone work for southwest airlines?or know of a way to check if WW has taken a flight?I believe she is no longer in this state with the kids. |  |  |  
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Joined:  Sep 2011 Posts: 1,156 Member |  
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Ed, not sure what to tell you here. I'm going to leave the advice on how to proceed to ones more suited to provide said advice.
 I'm simply not qualified to offer helpful advice here in your situation. I do believe I AM qualified, however, to keep you in my prayers.
 
 And you are. Hang in there friend
 
 
 
 Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
 
 -Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
 
 
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Joined:  Mar 2010 Posts: 1,079 Member |  
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Yeah, well Ed, I believe the following:
 Either you are the ultimate in the insensitve and frightened H, afraid to even talk to his W.
 
 **edit**
 
 If you are being honest, then I do have sympathy for you.  **edit**
 
 Tom
 
 
 
Last edited by MBLBanker; 01/24/12 04:38 AM. Reason: TOS: personal attack
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