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If I am posting this in the incorrect area, or if I shouldn't be posting this at all, please forgive my error and remove/move my post if necessary.
I have been looking over the various threads here for a bit now and, after reading so many, I seem to see a similar "pattern" between many posts.
I love you, but I am not "in love" with you I have fallen out of love with you I don't love you in the same way I used to love you I love you but I don't love you in "that" way anymore
and so on.
Not all posts come out and mention these certain phrases/words but, from reading between the lines, it seems many actually "speak" them and this has now aroused my curiosity as to what others feel these phrases/words "really" mean.
I guess what I am asking is; what is your perspective on the ol' "ILYBINILWY" line often used? What do you think it sincerely means when it is spoken? Is it actually said with validity or, more so, spoken to make the speaker feel justified in doing something he/she, perhaps, should not be doing (ex: an A)? Can someone who was once truly in love ever really even fall "out of love" or is falling out of love just a flimsy excuse to get out of doing what it takes to keep a relationship alive?
I guess what I am asking is; what is your perspective on the ol' "ILYBINILWY" line often used?
It means he has a NEW point of comparison. See, he wouldn't know he was out of love unless he was in love ELSEWHERE. "ILYBINILWY" is a CLASSIC sign of an affair.
And I would keep this to your thread on MB101. You might also ask the moderators to combine this thread with your other one and move it to Survivng an Affair forum. Just click the notify button and ask them to do this.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt
Spoken when a married (wayward) person is having some (or one) top INTIMATE emotional need being currently met by a non-spouse other person.
Many other ENs might be adequately met by the faithful spouse during an affair. But , if they are not particularly romantic or sexy ENs (domestic support & family commitment & financial support come to mind) and the sexier ENs are being met by the other person .... the romantic love for the spouse has been transferred to the other person/affair partner.
The sexier ENs might include physical attractiveness, sexual fulfillment, admiration.
