With ya Bro. What is a soul worth?

Have you tried the internet dating thing? I followed a link from facebook to a speeddating site. I figured,"Not much money, and I will be honest, I just wanted to talk a little...."

See I figured I am not ready anyways, and might just meet some nice people, but that wasn't the experience really. The really friendly ones, lol, wanted to invite me to a cam show, and many were looking to go stright into a relationship. Felt like I was looking for a job and would have to pad my resume'. ROFL I applaud the ones who were serious though, at least they were real.

Just wanted to be social thats all, not get involved. It will be different for me, I allways was working two three jobs, and NEVER was set financially, so I could date. I need to learn how, again. Lets face it, dates are supposed to go somewhere, rarely are they to just kill time, although I have had some of those too with women a long time ago..(I think they were to just kill time, but now I don't know, knowing what I know and have learned over the years, maybe I was some kinda eyecandy or I was being used in some other way)

The dumbsel in distress was the worse kind of scam, they use pretty pictures of young women and make up stories trying to quote scripture,(Sorta sloppy stuff aimed to make them look like the innocent, and how they were all Godly and such). "I just dream about you now at night", Do you think God wants us to be together?", "I knew when I saw you that you were special"

I swear they were taking it out of a romance novel, and I would tell them to be careful, thinking they had a screw loose or maybe were nieve. "Dumbsels" in distress, how would I know? I was just not callous enough to let them be abused, even though they were not my children.

I did some research, and eventually shut them down, but was left with a feeling of wasting my time, which I must treasure. I will have to let God and the delegated authorities deal with them.

There is no way but through the cross. I am not against Online dating and chat, but it will have to be something for when I am ready to come out from behind the keyboard, and I can fill out a suitable resume'. Women should not be lead on, and what kind of man puts a women on a string, because he can't make up his mind whether he wants a date or not? I can be what they all consider a catch, and do the date thing, and be a gentleman, but as you know, we have to be ready for that, and it will happen when it happens.

You have been away from the lepaord for some time now, you must know what I mean, healing and inner vision returns slowly, and you can't force it either. It is God that gives it, and we can trust Him that he will when we are ready.

BTW I told every (girl?) I was posting to to come get these books, just in case they were really girls and not guys sitting in front of the keyboard scamming. Couldn't take the chance they might have been someones messed up daughter playing at being a grownup(?)

Think I will go over to the dating thread and see what I can find about online dating. It seems that is the way of the future, and I know lots of people who met online and are making it happen. Us old Dogs ya know.

Shout out to Kay Praying for you also, and continued blessings for you!

Hey CP, nice "hearing" from you! I saw you were ducking and dodging (Hurricane) Irene like many others. I hope you escaped undamaged.

Right now, dating of any sort - online, speed or just the plain ol' fashioned way - is way off my radar screen. Dealing with an incompetent bank (who says there's such as thing as "too big to fail," anyway?) about selling my house and making the effort to land a real job and not a part-time retail position is taking up all of my time and energy. Not to mention that not having disposable income to use on dating activities makes it difficult for me to present myself as a viable, stable candidate for a relationship.

Oh sure, some may say that not having a job or know where one is going to be living next don't come into play when engaging with people, but it makes a difference to me. So I'm just going to avoid the dating scene until other things work out.

That is, unless God has other plans for me!

Well I am gonna ask him to ome down and smack me around till I am looking at him face to face,(Boy that leaves a lot open to interpetation lol), if he would like me to relax my standards that accually are as close to His as far as I knew...

Yeah Fred, I am in the same agreement with you as above, and the people who I knew in the past who had such a Bohemian,(nice word for bum), outlook did not have much starch in thier shirts either, if you know what I mean. It seems they were the "wayward" type people also, looking for easy street, or fooled into believing there was one. They didn't see the value of Gods size XXX boot when it was kicking them in the butt.

We faired well with the storm, it really broke down in this part of town to a tropical storm. No trees down, my house didn't flood.

PS after God comes down and shakes me loose, Ya want I should tell Him about you wanting a visit?

God bless you brother

Wow,reading about your speed dating exp. I'm glad I'm not into that, ha! I guess scammers are everywhere (my ex for example). Hope you can find someone real that will just be of some interest and fun for a while..

Fred, I hope you find the job you're looking for. I may end up piecemealing two part time jobs to make ends meet...hope I don't have to work six days a week to end up with less than I used to have for five. Sigh...

Good to hear everyone's surviving the east coast storm, my prayers are with all back there!

Yeah, it was like I knew it would be Kay, but thought I guess it might be different. It's like God said, "Oh,so your doin that then, well I guess you will have to experience it again, so you can see it doesn't t change"

I wasn't expecting it too really, it's really me who Is not ready, because when I am, it will just happen while living life, and with someone whom is a Freind


When it starts though, I will have this site to help me reflect on, and no more sacrifice.
I have learned my lesson

It's so quiet on here lately, anybody around?

CP: I hope you meet someone when you're ready, it'd be nice if we all could but honestly I don't see how I'll meet anyone when pretty much all I do anymore is clean house, walk the dogs, and job search, ugh!

hehe forgot about this thread Kay..

How about at work? When you get the job that is. Even though I would not have a problem getting a woman interested, I am burnt out on so much it seems, and that is my own attitude also.

I am sure I will change over time, and I am still seeking God for the balances. Now its my time to take care of me, and still my children need me to be there for them. They are allways watching and looking for leadership, and not living life is not leadership, thats retiring at 53.

Baby steps Kay, I think I have earned the right to go slowly, and I sure am not as excited as I once was anyways, lol.

Going out for a two mile walk, in the long run it helps with the pain in my feet, and I'm not dead yet. Exercize starts next month on the machines at the Y, and excersize will be great for me.

You should look for a friend at work, or at church, or anywhere Kay, you only live once, and your a fine woman.

I haven't met anyone I'd be even remotely interested in...right now my job is cut back from five days/week to one so the time I'm there I am in fast motion! Two months left on unempl., I sure hope a job is on the horizon soon! At least my arm seems to have healed (yay!) and shoveling snow, stacking firewood will rebuild my muscles this winter.

I hear ya on the walking, I walk twice a day, but for me it's easier because it's so gorgeous here, I don't go to the gym or a treadmill, I'm in the country walking beautiful Huskies!

Yeah Kay, all the support for people I have is wrapped up in my family, close freinds, and this site. Now I have to take care of myself as the days of taking care of others is over.

I sure hope you can find meaningful work that is fufilling, I know how important that is to us.

Lol, I started to walk every day till my feet bled, literally, because I can't stand how much I have deteriorated the last 6 years, since the doctor told me I "can't" work anymore.

Joining the Y tommorow on a promotion for $1, and the rest of the month free, I need some structure, and I just don't have the plain oomph I used to have 20 years ago.

Its funny though I am a diabetic, and until my wife died, was pretty active, and had little problems with numbness in my feet. After she passed I think depression just took over, and in those two years of inactivity, both my damaged leg and my other one started to get numb. Since I got pizzed and started walking they have improved.

I have allways pictured Oregon as logger and wild beutiful rain forests. Now walking huskies has added to it.

Don't ever stop moving girlfren, and don't let the B@stards get you down

Constant,
I'm glad to hear your feet have improved with your walking. I have seen some beginning signs of Neuropathy as I am also Diabetic. I was always able to control it with diet and exercise but in the recent months, my doctor tells me that stress released cortisol in my body which reeks havoc with cholesterol and sugar levels, so now she's prescribed medicine for me but says that should help. Perhaps if I get a job I like the cortisol levels will go down and I can get off the medicine, we'll see. Good luck with your joining the Y, let us know how that goes!

Thanks K,

One of my problems is that I have had problems with numbness from a mangled left tibia and fibia above the ankle at 12, with a few operations later, it still was never comepletly fixed. When I was finnally told to stop working, because I had a broken foot and was walking on it, I laughed,"Oh yeah, well that has been crunching like that since 1996. It keeps me awake some nights but..."

Sad when I was the fastest sprinter you knew at one time, lol, but I still could run, worked hard work and stayed on my feet for hours, and would not let it stop me, most of my life.

Add to that losing cartilage in football knee blowout, and just a year before W death, something there snapped also, so, lol, now be ready to laugh.
I soon started to walk like Fred Sanford, and made jokes about "I'm coming Elizabeth!" That was one of my wifes favorite pantamines of mine years ago. I used to make a lot of people laugh.

Favorite example of how slowing down,(and probably cortizone added from stress attributed also), was that I can't walk well never mind run, and the added weight, about 100 lbs more than I like, and I feel like I am a balancing act on stilts, precariously tottering towards my destination, compared to the solid man of action I used to be.

But the good news is, that my legs are coming back, and I even feel like it is possible, that I may be able to run again, if I keep up the pace.

Diabeates is about eating good quality food that you body can use, and no more. If your type 1 then it is also nessesary to take insulin like me, but if it is only type 2, keep it that way by diet and excersize, and I am in total aggrement with you, age is a state of mind.

Thanks for the reminder that cortisol and stress has had a lot to do with my body breaking down over the years, and now that it is slowly receding, I am feeling healthier than I have for a long time, and use less insulin also.

Next to train hard on those weight machines, to get back my younger farm boy adonis figure lol. Used to turn heads, and I wasn't even trying, but jeez I liked being healthy and active, attractive was more of a PITA really.

The only one I wanted to be attractive for was my wife.

Just if you see me driving around in a sports car trying to pick up young girls, please just shoot me and put me out of my misery k? God please?

Gonna get into Yoga, back to smimming a lot, and my martial arts also. The Dojo has some MMA bouts, and if I can handle that physically, maybe if its done well I will enter a few. But mostly with Martial arts it is the mind over body meditation that appeals to me. The mental discipline, that we all can use.


You keep moving and rocking Kay, and stay active, watch your diet, and you will be great.

I will give you a Y update soon

It's hard to believe more than a year has passed since I started this thread. I was reminded of it last night when I was asked about my availability to attend the annual Christmas Eve brunch.

If you've read this entire thread, you'll know that a group of people gather at a country club on Christmas Eve morning for a luxurious brunch and fellowship.

Last year, thanks to the urging and encouragement of many of you, I invited a woman I'd been interested in seeing. We went on a few dates subsequent to the brunch, but things never "sparked" and so we've continued on our separate ways.

So last night, I was asked if I was coming again this year, and if I wanted to invite someone. I didn't even hesitate when I replied that no, I was coming alone this year.

There is still a part of me that would like to enjoy a relationship, but this year, there are no prospects that see, and I'm just not that interested in pursuing that path right now.

As I have been told more than once, "I'm right where I need to be" at this time. I don't have to like it, but I do have to accept it.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Fred, contact the mods if you want to be my FB friend.

How does that work here? I'd love to be FB friends with some of y'all, but with no private messaging I'm at a loss for exchanging info.

As I understand it, the "invitee" notifies the moderators that he or she will accept private messages from a specific poster. The moderators then notify that individual through the email they used when they registered with MB.

This is how I (and probably many others) managed to find an IM to help me through my separation/Plan B and subsequent divorce.

Thanks, Pep!

Kirby-

If you want to offer someone your email addy, or your FB name, write to that person (best on their thread) and extend an invite. Then, once the post is sent, click on "notify moderator" button. You then write a quick note to the mods including any address you chose to give out. The person (Fred in this case) will either take you up on that offer, or not. Please, be careful. I only befriend people I've been posting with for quite awhile.

Thanks, Pep.

I've made some very dear friends through internet connections, but I know that caution is important.

I'm posting this because I was asked in another thread on another forum for an update.

The truth is that there's not really much to report. I've been working since November and have been focusing on getting up to speed. I'm also in the process of selling my house and looking for new (smaller) quarters.

To that end, I put a deposit on a nice ground floor apartment that has two bedrooms, two bathrooms and a direct-access private one-car garage. If everything falls into place, I should be moving in early March.

One benefit to this change is that it's making me take inventory and choosing those things I won't take with me. A side effect of having a large house is that I tend to let things collect and gather. I won't be able to do so in a smaller dwelling.

No romance, no relationship prospects on the horizon. I have a few moments where that saddens me a bit, but I'm also reminded of the problem of "being in love with love." It's hard to have a relationship (or even date) when there aren't any viable candidates in view! My work (both full-time and part-time) doesn't lend itself well to meeting datable members of the opposite sex.

I'm still somewhat bothered by my leg problem, which has caused me to cut way back on my running. Now that I have health insurance again, I plan to address that once I've established some level of security at my job.

So, that's the extent of my non-update update. The one true positive I can report here is that my mental state has certainly improved! I have found myself nicely adjusted to the bachelor life (such as mine may be) and find I am generally enjoying life one day at a time again.

(Thanks, Kirby. No, I haven't seen any message. I haven't been looking, though.).

It sounds like you're doing well. I know you think nothing big has happened, but a lot of little things are going well. I bet in a few months you'll get everything back up to speed and will be ready to find a nice runner chick to hang out with.

I had asked the moderators to pass along my Facebook information if you wanted to be friends there. Hmmm.....

Hi Kirby,

I use a dedicated email account for MB, as I felt it was necessary for my IM during my Plan B. I haven't checked it in ages. That explains why I didn't get the message (and if the mods ever want to slap my fingers for something I've written, I'll likely not know it for weeks!).

As for Facebook, thanks for the invite, but due to the "sensitive" requirements of my new job, I'm locking down my online identity -- and Facebook is one of the first places I'm planning to do without. It's a very unsecure and revealing place, and even though I don't have anything to hide, I shudder to think what some of my "friends" my post.