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#2596874 02/14/12 10:25 AM
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Many here on this board are suffering today. Some in pain they never have known could exist. Others know the pain but it is part of their past and some here today I suspect know joy.
The thing is... their are people here who come together to help strangers confront the reality of their worst fears or perhaps the reality of where their worst behaviors have gotten them.
The people here deserve something more special than a Valentine.
They willingly open their hearts and others willingly contribute their knowledge and experience.
That is one simple definition of selfless love.
Thank you all.


Hurting Turkey

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Originally Posted by hurtingturkey
Many here on this board are suffering today. Some in pain they never have known could exist. Others know the pain but it is part of their past and some here today I suspect know joy.
The thing is... their are people here who come together to help strangers confront the reality of their worst fears or perhaps the reality of where their worst behaviors have gotten them.
The people here deserve something more special than a Valentine.
They willingly open their hearts and others willingly contribute their knowledge and experience.
That is one simple definition of selfless love.
Thank you all.


Hurting Turkey

Thank you! Hope you have a great day!

CV


Celtic Voyager
Married 22+ years
3 young adult children


"A story of me"
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Originally Posted by hurtingturkey
Some in pain they never have known could exist.
Hurting Turkey

No, I never knew this kind of pain could exist. I suspected how it would be like, I saw my Dad going through it, but not until I experienced it, I really knew what it is like...

My heart goes out to all of you, those who are suffering and those who had overcome and found joy again. May we all find peace and joy again in a near future, regardless of what the outcome is.

Happy Valentine...

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"They willingly open their hearts and others willingly contribute their knowledge and experience.
That is one simple definition of selfless love."


I want to add my thanks to the vets and posters. Thanks for your support, advice, patience and wisdom! You make this road possible to navigate...


BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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You are so right Hurting Turkey. I never knew this would hurt so bad. I thought it would be hard but I never thought it would be this hard. Valentine's was always a big deal in our relationship so to not have any contact is killing me. I just keep wondering if he has done something special for OW, I'm sure he has, but I am trying to not dwell on what they might be doing. For me it's the first "hard" day of the year. I keep getting these moments when I can't breathe and I'm over come with grief and sadness.

I think it's great that we can all support one another on these hard days. Thank you Hurting Turkey.


D-day 1- August 2011
D-day 2- October 2011
D-day 3- December 2011
Filed for divorce 2-2012

Married since 7-04
Together since 1-02
1 child-19 months old
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From the card she gave me this morning:

"Dear BH, these words say it so much better than I could but they say everything I think of every day:

I dont ever want
To take you for granted,
I dont ever want to forget
what it was like before you
or how it would be without you...

I dont ever want to forget
our first kiss
or our last touch
or let a day go by
without telling you
how much you mean to me,
how deeply I love you,
and how much I need you...

I dont ever want you to doubt
the way I feel
or how much happier I am because of you.

Happy Valentine's Day" yada yada yada.

She went on in her writing about bumps in the road and starting over and new beginnings and hoping we get through it.

I really hope those hurting today and find something to cling onto and manage to find happiness.

mss





Life keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping into the fuuuu-ture.
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+1 to your Valentine's Day card Mike.

+1 To the vets that offer their help.

I got irony for Valentine's Day...WS had hand surgery this morning...2 pins put in the fingertip joint on......


Oh come on can anyone guess?

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Thanks for the post, hurting.

Indeed, today was very hard. Very painful. My wife spent her V-Day overseas with her affair partner, but I have the girls so I take great comfort in that.

Gonna stay sad, but gonna make it a great night for the daughters and smile over the hurt.

Peace.

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Originally Posted by survivergirl
I just keep wondering if he has done something special for OW,

I thought about that too. But then something struck me; last year my WH gave me a gold & diamond ring, a family heirloom for Valentine's. OW will never have that.
WH was sporting a bracelet I did not recognise last time I saw him. I did not ask but assumed OW bought it for him. I bought WH several bracelets over the years. So nothing 'special' there , then.

My point is, there isn't a whole lot they can buy or do for eachother that hasn't been done before between WH and me.
All the stuff he buys her, chances are, he bought me the same or similar sometime during our 12 years together.
And vice versa, all she buys & gives him will be an unoriginal re-hash of something I did or got him sometime in the past. It is not anything special.

So there you go, it's a resounding analogy to marriage v. affair: original & true intend versus cheap imitation tat.

Last edited by Maryse; 02/15/12 08:10 AM.

Me, BS, 35
J, WS, 33
12 years together, married 2.
No kids, just cats
D-day 06/30/11
In Plan B

"If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."

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