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By "here" I meant the UK/Europe. I'm not sure you'll find it "there"!
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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 So Estrela means beer in UKese.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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So Estrela means beer in UKese. 
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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Just googled it, Estrella is a spanish beer (from Barcelona). I doubt I would find it here, I wish I could go to Barcelona for the weekend and try one 
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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Along with the indian cooking classes, how about some spanish? Then you could do a spanish dinner for you and the boys and friends.
Also, having lived overseas, sometimes it can suprise you what you can find in speciality stores. Check some out. I have managed to find one of my favourite Czech beers in Aus.
Or maybe you should be planning that Barcelona trip for the future... the world is your oyster...
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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Does anyone ship beer? You could get some, I think, provided you are ready to pay some obscene shipping.
Then again I don't know many laws regarding the shipping of alcohol.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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WH just sent me an e-mail. He forwarded his brother's e-mail about a death in the family in Israel.
I called WH's mother to express my sentiments.
I will not reply/acknowledge WH's e-mail.
Today he is taking the kids to a hockey game. It is a holiday, but I have to work so I will be busy.
I read in another thread about putting the name of OW in the skankhow website. I would love for anyone who google her name to be directed to the website! Is this something MB recommended as "exposure"?
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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WH just sent me an e-mail. He forwarded his brother's e-mail about a death in the family in Israel.
I called WH's mother to express my sentiments.
I will not reply/acknowledge WH's e-mail.
Today he is taking the kids to a hockey game. It is a holiday, but I have to work so I will be busy.
I read in another thread about putting the name of OW in the skankhow website. I would love for anyone who google her name to be directed to the website! Is this something MB recommended as "exposure"? You shouldn't have even acknowledged the email by contacting his mother. It came to you directly? Then it gets IGNORED. Your sentiments could have been given at a later time, when you heard about it from someone else. It's not an emergency, and not something that you would have needed to respond to immediately. Learn from it, and don't do it again. Also, have you now changed your email addy so this can't happen again? And leave that site alone. Not the proper kind of "exposure" as we talk about it here, on MB. It would cross more into Plan F/U territory.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Scotty - thanks for making these points...
I will block WH so it will go straight to junk (He sent the e-mail to my work address and not easy to change... but easy to block)
I thought that if he does not know that I read the e-mail it would not count, but I can see how he could use that to break Plan B...
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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Scotty - thanks for making these points...
I will block WH so it will go straight to junk (He sent the e-mail to my work address and not easy to change... but easy to block)
I thought that if he does not know that I read the e-mail it would not count, but I can see how he could use that to break Plan B... Oh no estrela, it's not at all about what he thinks you can see, it's all about YOU not seeing what you don't need to see. It's all about self preservation. Your opening yourself up to this kind of exposure to him is only hurting you.
Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Exactly. It's not about what HE finds out about YOU. It's about protecting YOURSELF from him and all of his drama.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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I've been listening to Dr. Harley about Plan B (link that ML put in one of the threads). Very interesting how he describes that as the BH gets stronger in Plan B(he was talking about female BH specifically), she also has a more critical view on her situation and her M...
I think I've been going through this a bit. Getting more skeptic about the state of the M and understanding how narrow is the recovery road.
WH has not tried to contact me at all. I know he is "respecting" plan B, but he also seems very comfortable with his new situation.
I knew this could happen, and I think it shows how far away he is of our M...
And, I have to admit, I checked the e-blaster account once a couple of days ago! I know... I did not go into his e-mail but could see stuff about his work, etc., it is so hard just to ignore ...
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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Estrella, we tell you not to snoop on him because it will stifle YOUR recovery. It has NOTHING to do with him. SO.....STOP IT.
More importantly, did you get that new nail polish? How were those cooking classes?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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And, I have to admit, I checked the e-blaster account once a couple of days ago! I know... I did not go into his e-mail but could see stuff about his work, etc., it is so hard just to ignore ... estrela sweetheart, you need to stop this. I'm no Plan B'er and by no means an expert on the subject. But I do, in a simplistic way, understand the concepts of PB. Un-install the eblaster now. You have all the evidence you need, so no sense in having it anymore. You must separate yourself from this contact in order for you to heal. No contact means no contact. Remove temptation. I know it's easier said than done, but get it done. You have no business heaping this kind of pain on yourself. Just no benefit to it. Oh, and prepare yourself for a couple of 2x4s from indie and Scotty. You can bet they're coming!
Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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I guess I might just need to uninstall the beast... One thing I worry about is our joint savings account and I thought I would have the option to keep an eye on what he is doing (i.e. not touching it), but now I think I will better check with an attorney how to secure the savings so I do not need to worry about none of this for now (the first attorney I spoke with was not very helpful).
Otherwise, everything is going well. I had the first cooking class yesterday. It was awesome. Fun and yummy. I already tried one recipe today but the kids were not too excited about it.
And yes, I brought a new nail polish and I am waiting for Sunday to try it on.
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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YEA about the cooking class being fun. Maybe some of us MBers will need to stop by to taste your cooking and see how you've come along. Invites? (HEHEHEHE, GEEZ that's a little pushy even for me HAHAHA)
And I am SUPER EXCITED about the new nail polish colour.
So other than that, how you holding up?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Other than that, I am good. It is still weird when WH comes to pick up kids. Sometimes I feel sad (like when DS was looking at past year pictures and we looked so happy together). But most of the time I feel confident that I can be (and I am) strong enough to go through this, whatever outcome, I will be fine. (thanks to you, all MBs and Plan B)! I started a diet to loose few pounds and it started to work, so I also feel more confident about myself. And yes, you are welcome to come be my food critic! My kids are not up to the job
BS (me) 46
STBX WH 53
Married 2000
DS, 11; DS, 10
1st A: LT D-Day - 02/14/06
2nd A: D-Day - 12/21/11
Plan B since 1/17/12
Divorcing
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Posts: 10,179
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Children generally don't bother to chew. If they did, maybe they'd make better food critics.
Kudos to you for your honesty about peeking. When you're first in PB, it may feel like peeking doesn't do much damage. That's because with your chest ripped open, you don't notice at first that one of your fingernails got torn off. But if you want to heal your very best, there comes a point (now would be good), where you stop allowing new damage to occur, and focus on life patterns that will allow past damage to heal.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Neak describes it perfectly, looking at that account is like ripping off a nail.
I am more or less healed and for a few days recently, I had WHs wedding ring sat on a shelf.
Each time I walked past it I could feel it jab me. But a few months ago I wouldn't have noticed - because there were pictures and triggers everywhere. The pain from all sources merged into one big gloop.
Uninstall that eblaster! If you need it for finances checking have someone else do it and change the password.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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BTW, there was actually a man who had his chest ripped open, and a nail torn off. If I remember correctly, it was PJ Pretorius. (If I don't remember correctly, it wasn't, ha ha.) He was out hunting in Africa and got tossed way in the air by a rhino, back in the late 1800s or early 1900s. One of his nails had been ripped off, and was causing him terrible pain...until he looked down at his chest and found one gargantuan pectoral ripped away and dangling by a flap. Then he didn't notice his finger so much any more. Love Peter Hathaway Capstick stories! Fun to read, and you never know when one will come in handy for a gripping illustration. 
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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