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Joined: Jan 2011
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Kirby Offline OP
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Time to revive my thread.

Help.

I'm the social secretary for my divorce group. I keep an email list and send out reminders and pass along prayer requests, etc. I'm the keeper of the birthday list and organize going out for coffee or dinner after our meetings.

Tonight I got an email from a man in the divorce group. He wanted to let me know that he thinks of me often. He felt he needed to "say his peace."

This poor guy is not for me. I need to let him down gently. Any advice?


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
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Matter of fact and to the point.

Ugh. It is hard I know.

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Kirby Offline OP
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Done. Gentle, but direct. I hope he'll be okay. And I hope he will see that I'm not the right person for him.


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
K
Kirby Offline OP
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Posts: 651
Time to update my thread.

So, there was a guy in my divorce group that I was somewhat interested in, and he was giving off some indicators of interest--eye contact, one-on-one conversations, etc. But a week and a half ago at divorce group he said some MORE stuff that showed me he has a lack of integrity. I am probably overly sensitive to skirting the truth since WXH was a liar/cheater, etc. Either way, I have totally lost interest.

My divorce will have been final for a year in less than two weeks. I joined ChristianMingle, but didn't put up any pictures as a way to see what's out there. They keep recommending people that I find totally wrong for me. Feel free to call me a snob, but I would have a hard time dating someone who hasn't been to college.

A long time ago, I did a profile on match without putting up pictures or paying any money. They send out regular emails and I got one with a picture that I recognized. It's my WXH. He says that he's been divorced for 2 years. MrRollieEyes His profile also says that he is 5'6" which is an inch shorter than he always claimed. I think his height will make it hard for him to find someone.

And I actually spoke to WXH recently. My boys' school had a fund-raiser and I was there with my parents and a bunch of female friends. I was wearing my 4" heels. WXH came over and complimented my hair. (I've added highlights since we divorced). I looked down at him and thanked him. <snicker> The whole thing felt odd. For awhile, I was so afraid that he was going to keep using the legal system to harass me. His last frivolous motion was in August, and the most recent harassing letter from his lawyer to mine was in September. When I looked at WXH I realized that I am no longer afraid of him. I don't hate him. I mostly feel sorry for him.


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,463
K
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Posts: 1,463
How interesting! It must feel weird to run across XWH on a dating site!


Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
Joined: Jan 2011
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Kirby Offline OP
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Hi, y'all. Today is the one-year anniversary of my divorce.

Thanks for all the advice and support you have given me. I probably won't be around much any more.


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,094
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Originally Posted by Kirby
Hi, y'all. Today is the one-year anniversary of my divorce.

Thanks for all the advice and support you have given me. I probably won't be around much any more.

Congrats Kirb! A year of water under the bridge.
I'll miss you. Thanks for all your help. Hope you at least check in and also keep us posted.

opt


Me: 43 y.o. BFWH, D-day 11/11/09 (NC since 9/01)
Divorce from WW final 9/16/10.
Current Status: MB-based Marriage to Nature Girl 12/8/12 (first date on 12/11/10)
Mine: S(16), D(11)
NatureGirls: S(23), D(21)
Another EA Story
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