She is not married. I know her first and last name and the city she lives.
He tells me he doesn't have her phone number, because he deleted it. Said he never talked to her on the phone. Texted her through Facebook.

His answers are awful!

1). Have you ever, at any time, in any place, during the entire course of your marital relationship, touched another woman's body in a manner that your wife would object to if she were to have caught you doing it?

Answer: Yes, OW#2 put my hand in her lap. I felt her breasts and crotch area.

2). Has your mouth ever sexually touched any part of another woman's body during your marriage?

Answer: Mouth and crotch. I kissed and went down on OW#2

3). Has your penis ever touched any part of another woman's body during your marriage?

Answer: OW#2 grabbed my penis. She was trying to put it in her when an employee opened the door.

4). Has another woman's mouth ever sexually touched any part of your body during your marriage?

Answer: My mouth. OW #2 kissed me but did not go down on me.

I told him that these are not details and I need to know everything, so I gave him a stack of 20 blank pages and told him to get busy writing.

Thats a good start! He needs to write you a story. And when he is finished let him know the polygraph is still waiting.

Ask for the name of the employee who busted in on them. I still have a feeling he is covering up for the OW.

Can you find her number and call her?

I'm going to try!

Starfish, I really admire how strong and decisive you're being. Keep your standards high.

I came home and he had a blow-up mattress in our office already. I guess he knew that I would ask him to sleep in the other room. I asked him if he wrote me the details and he said no and he didn't know what it would help. I told him that it's THE LEAST THING HE COULD DO FOR ME AND OUR MARRIAGE! I told him that I deserved the truth... I wouldn't back down! I told him that he needed to do this TONIGHT!!!!! NO EXCEPTIONS!!!!
I'm in SHOCK right now... The pain will be coming, but I truly hate him right now! Can I please wake up from this nightmare already?

*hugs*

It will help him save his marriage. If he is serious about saving his marriage he had better start telling the truth.

Please do your best to calm down, starfish. What is happening is what usually happens when you hold their feet the fire. There is a big confession with lots of new information. I told you to expect this. I know this is so very hard. So just stay CALM and be firm. And here is a big hug to you, friend.

Thank you so much.... I'm trying to be strong, but this is so HARD!!!! I'm watching him write through the window and he keeps looking to the left and rubbing his head and having a very difficult time with this. I don't know what to do here.... I need the truth. An I finally going to get the truth???
How will I know when I finally have the FULL TRUTH?

How do I take time off from work? I need time to take care of me right now!

I got his story... not sure what to believe. He contested the poly, but in the end said ok he would go!

What should I ask her or say to her... OW#2?

I'm so angry right now!!!! I don't know what to do!!!

He deleted his fb, but never deleted OW #2, he only deleted OW#1. I logged back in on his fb account and changed his password so he can't access it. I sent OW#2 a message pretending to be him. Please don't scold me for this... I'm desperate to get the truth and don't know what else to do right now!!! OW#2 is 6 years younger than me and I'm not going to lie, she is a very pretty girl/woman. She is blonde like me... thank God she lives out of state! What is wrong with him and these women that are out of state? I cannot fathom what he was thinking! We have been trying to conceive and he could've given me an STD! I'm furious!!! I'm venting here... Not to him right now, but I seriously want to strangle him!!!

He got Salesman of the Year at work, but certainly no Husband of the Year! He is a lousy husband and I hate him right now!

I'm going to burn all of his ski clothes tomorrow and take his snowboard to the dump! He makes me so ANGRY!!!!

You all were right and I do believe that he did have sex with her after he gave me his story. He said she was trying to put his p inside of her in a storage closet of all places and an employee walked in on them do they couldn't finish! Are you serious???? What perfect timing, right???? ARRRRRGGGHHH!

I'm going to try to get in touch with his friend's wife tomorrow (the one he went on his trip with) to tell his wife. This story is not adding up!!!

Get the facts...push for the poly...you ate doing great!

I haven't read your entire thread Starfish, but just wanted to let you know someone is listening!

Starfish, hugs to you!!! What you are hearing is traumatic, and your WH is trickle truthing you, which is awful. As soon as you try to get your head around one blow, another awful blow comes.

This needs to stop.

Book the poly. Tell him the date. And tell him your marriage rests on his doing it, as a step towards earning your trust back as you will not continue with this traumatic trickle truth...

No ifs, buts or maybes. As the poly nears your WH will likely spill the beans or back out. You must stay strong in your resolve. As you do not want a WH, you want a committed FWH working on recovery. And that cannot happen without the truth.

When he passes the poly.

You NEED the poly because he has trickle truthed you. You will always doubt him unless he passes the poly. You can not fully recover your marriage if you continue to be trickle truthed.

As for OW#2, I am certainly not going to scold you for trying to get the truth! As his wife, you have a right to the truth!

Personally, I wouldn't contact OW#2. There is no purpose, she has shown she has no morals (hon, they always affair down just on that basis, pretty or not). Can you copy her friend list? This is really important. Copy it so you can expose to her side. We can help with FB exposure. And copy any incriminating messages between WH and OW#2 to use as evidence if needed. Save it somewhere safe and send copies to an account WH cannot access. You may need it later...

And as ML said, you need to stay as calm as you can... I know, easier said than done. Breath, eat, sleep. Be nice to yourself. You are in shock.

Good for keeping his feet to the fire ... youre doing BRILIANTLY.

Dont get angry with him and burn stuff though, he needs to see a firm unflappable DANGEROUSLY quiet wife... like an FBI agent, kwim? Angry outbursts show weakness, so punch a pillow or vent some other way if you have to, but keep your game face on.

Hugs hugs hugs.