The day after our daughter's sixth birthday, last year:

"Hi Reception,
I telephoned this morning to request that [ref no. and WS's name] (which is my booking) that I be moved away from the rest of the group.

Can you leave a key at reception for [OM] for my room?

Please confirm this is all ok?"

What can I say, MBers? How Sweet It Is To Be Loved By [Her].

Are you exposing now?

Exposure is going to be tough, VERY tough, so you use whatever resource you can draw from within to get it done. Whatever resource! It doesn't matter what motivates you to get it rolling, just don't lose sight of the real reason why you are exposing, and that is because you love your wife and want to make every effort to recover your marriage. No guarantees. No expectations.

One of your most important jobs as her husband is to protect her. You not exposing this right now is you failing to protect her from her own worst enemy.

Herself

What are you saying here?

I would suggest that one's motivation is not relevant. The need to expose the affair supercedes any motivation, so I wouldn't even give it a seconds thought!

igii, she is a serial cheater, isn't she? She leads a completely secret second life and has for a long time.

ARe you sending out those exposure letters now?

Intended Facebook Exposure PM (sadly, to limited audience -- see below):
----
Dear friend of OM,
It grieves me to write this letter but I believe all of OM�s friends should know the kind of person he really is. OM has been having an affair with my wife, WS, for 18 months or so. I believe that his friends should know this, so you can protect your marriage from him. My wife and I have a small daughter and a young son, and this affair has almost wrecked our marriage and almost broken up our family.

I would be happy to provide the evidence to anyone who asks.

I would appreciate it if someone would notify OM�s parents as well as the mother of his recent child, and invite them to contact me on [my real phone number] or at [my real e-mail address].

Thank you,
BH
----

The most prominent (ie prolific!) poster to OM's Facebook page is my WS herself! I saw nothing that identified any of the other 60+ posters as family members. Does that devalue the Fb Exposure? I would LOVE to have had his GF's details -- but there's little prospect of my finding that now, and surely no point delaying in the vague hope that I will somehow stumble upon it..?

(It just seems a weak Exposure that the audience is made up largely of DJ groupies and fellow DJs who probably see bed-hopping as a sport...)

I added one line above. It is a good idea to ask for their help, that seems to movtivate some to take up your cause.


You may be stumbling across the GF and his family, ya just never know! You might hit paydirt.

Thanks, Mel. Checking: my real 'phone no. and e-mail address?

Yep, you got it!

So you sending the exposure now?

Oh, and do you cc:WS when e-mailing WS contacts/friends/family? (Instinct tells me NOT! Ie don't cc: WW)

No you don't tell WW anything about exposure. She finds out from the fallout.

maritalbliss, the above (object of your question) is a cut-and-paste from e-mail my WS sent...

OK. And is plain mean/vindictive to add to the WS Exposure contact list a couple of (male) recruitment agents with whom she has been friendly over the years? (I doubt there's been any impropriety there -- but then again, I am the world's best judge of that sort of thing, aren't I?!)

I meant IS IT plain mean/vindictive to add to the WS Exposure contact list a couple of (male) recruitment agents with whom she has been friendly over the years? (I doubt there's been any impropriety there -- but then again, I am the world's best judge of that sort of thing, aren't I?!)

I would most definitely include them. She might be having an affair with them and you never know who will have influence over her.

Thanx again, Mel. I am sure she hasn't had an affair with either of the recruiters. (Without speaking too bluntly, there's a race angle there, as well.) My cc:ing them as well would be partly out of anger, but also/only partly out of the fact that they might want to know the kind of person they might be recruiting into jobs...

(Hence my earlier question about motivation, ref anger/retribution/etc...)

Email: I've written the email, but I'm sleeping on the recruiters question.

Facebook: Found also that some of the contacts don't accept messages from all and sundry etc.

I would send it to the recruiters also.