I will listen to the clips. The earlier ones were helpful.

If he's away during the week, and then wants to play golf on the weekends without you, I think the problem is largely you don't have enough UA time together.

Things will not get better if you respond to his IB with IB of your own.

Back in Oct 2011, you posted that you were planning to move where he works. The time frame you gave should have you there now, what's happened with that.

What of his porn use, any relapse?

Seems you two are more like roommates on the weekends and have separate lives during the week. Would that be an accurate description?

I agree.

What are your plans for him to stop the traveling job? You've read what Dr. H says on this, correct? Traveling Jobs

He has decided that he isn't sure this is a job he wants long-term. He is very busy and fulfilled right now, but once things get up and running he says he'll be bored and will want to find something else, probably back home here. It's all very up in the air but when I pushed to find a house over there he wasn't enthusiastic.

As for porn use, he says he stays away from it now and I believe he does because he is not protective of his phone or computer anymore and also at this job he knows IT can see what websites he goes to so he refrains (he has housing provided on the grounds so the IT issues apply there as well).

I know my becoming more independent probably won't help, but since I don't see separation an option, I thought it would be better than trying so hard on my own and resenting him. But I know that's where we have left MB principles so I don't expect help with that part. Still just trying to learn to be the best wife I can be, but my Taker does come out so I'm quelling that somewhat with other interests.

On weekends we usually go out to dinner once and spend family time as well. Not quite at roommate status as we do have pretty good SF. We talk 45-60 min nightly on the days he is gone. And sometimes I go out there for a night mid-week.

You called Dr. H, correct? Or was it with Steve?

Do you remember the date of the show?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Dr. Harley suggest you to move there?

Yes he did. Dh isn't on board with moving the whole fam there. Don't know what else I can do.

Why wouldn't he want you there?

What was the date of your show?

I don't have the date of the show. I did talk with SH one time as well. That was mostly about the porn though.

He doesn't want us to move because both of our extended families are here. We lived away for 12 years and came back and he really doesn't want to leave again. I'm hurting again right now because he had one day off and came home for the 4th and spent half the day golfing. I just was RH again w him last night about how much his IB hurts me. Doesn't seem to matter. It really seems like an addiction to me.