What does he say when you ask him that you want him to stop drinking?

When you start this job, will you be able to put money aside?

Will you email the Harleys?

mama, listen to me. do not be misled that "this is the first time he's ever hit me." the first hit is not the last. they do not realise, with horror, what they've done. no. instead, it becomes easier and easier to be physically violent. please, mama, listen. i speak from your shoes. my xH hit me after several years together (in front on an audience no less), and only went on to do it more and more (not just one punch/slap/whatever), and more and more frequently. it turns out this is the SOP for abusers. once they've crossed that line, they only gets WORSE, not better. the fact that you are living in a country that supports the suppression of women only makes it seem more right to him.

i am very concerned because you *sound* like it's ok, it was a horrible accident, everything is going to be all right. *exactly* like an abused woman.

you need to get out. get out NOW. move heaven and earth and all places in between and get the hell out of dodge. please. for you. for your children. because if you think he won't hurt them, i will tell you: you are wrong. even if he doesn't physically strike them, what he does to YOU impacts them just as much. please, please, tell his mother and get OUT. go to your embassy, call whatever family you have, and leave this place.

He says that he can't, well actually that he doesn't want to but that he'll cut down and drink only on the weekends. I can put money aside once I start working. I would love to email them, can someone give me the email address?

I'm not going to leave him for slapping me, we have 18 years invested and its not right for me to just give up because of that. The other issues are way more important than that right now. Yesterday he only asked me again what I said to his friend in the text and if I texted him again, I said no and he said don't lie, I said I didn't, which I didn't. I said in all of this, the only thing you focus on is what I said to your friend?! He didn't go to work yesterday, was depressed and only stayed in bed.

He is more concerned with what you said to his friend then slapping you or his drinking or talking with these OW?

What is your plan?

You don't need money to email the show and here is the address.
Email your questions to Joyce Harley at mbradio@marriagebuilders.com.

Yes, it seems that right now he is focusing on that in order to avoid the bigger issues. I tried to email the Harleys but for some reason it was undeliverable. I really don't know what to do right now.

You must have got the address wrong, Mama. Sometime emails to them go into their spam folder, but those do not come back to you as undeliverable. Check the spelling of the address and send it to them again.

mbradio@marriagebuilders.com

Broken,

I have followed your thread since the start and I am so sorry your going through this. If you remember when I posted to you at the beginning I told you that I understand a lot of where you are coming from as far as the country your in and the customs there as I am half Arabic myself.

The answer to your statement above is that there is a lot you CAN do but my question back to you is what are you WILLING to do?

Slapping you is crossing the line big time and should you report it to the authorities. there is a good chance that they will not do anything to him but it will make him think twice before ever abusing you like that again. We live in London and my FWH works for the government and has a criminal records check regularly but when he hit me I did not hesitate for one second to contact the police and he now has a record for it and spent the night in jail. This was a scary step because he could have easily lost his job but a job is replaceable our marriage isn't and he needed to face the consequences of his actions no matter what they were or we could never have a happy marriage.

have you told his mum and relatives about his latest actions??
Have you considered the consequences to you if you carry on living like this?
Have you considered the consequences to your kids behaviour and life if you carry on living like this?

What are you WILLING to do to change things?

A good friend told me this today when I was having a good nag about work issue that keeps happening and I think it's a great quote so ill pass it on.

"For things to change you have to change"

c'mon, mama, you CAN do this!

where are you and what is happening? there are plenty of people here who can help you get a plan together and get rolling on it.

please tell me you reported his abuse.