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WH's attorney keeps sending the bills to the house, but not any of the other stuff, just the bills! Should I return to sender?

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Yep, they're not yours and WH doesn't live there.

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I returned the letter to sender yesterday. Hopefully he gets the point. Makes me wonder if he's doing it on purpose to see if I'll tamper with his mail? I don't think so buddy... you have nothing on me! I'm taking the high road!

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As many of you know, we work for the same company and he hasn't been emailing me at work, but I did receive an email today from him as I'm unable to block his email at work.

The email read:

I want to know if your willing to let me know what you want out of our divorce. I think we're adults enough to discuss this so that we don't have to go to mediation in September. Are you willing to give me a list so I can look it over?

WH

What's your take? By the way, I haven't responded!
I also have proof of money transferring to his personal accounts, which I'm making a list of and it's only for the past year and we've been married for 5 years!
Guess I'll forward the email to my attorney.
Our mediation is scheduled for Mid-September.

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Zip back at him.

Have your lawyer handle any legal stuff.







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Originally Posted by reading
Zip back at him.

Have your lawyer handle any legal stuff.

Reading:

What do you mean "Zip back at him?"

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Originally Posted by starfish75
Originally Posted by reading
Zip back at him.

Have your lawyer handle any legal stuff.

Reading:

What do you mean "Zip back at him?"
"zip" means nil, nada, nothing.

For what its worth, I think my WH has tried the same thing, just through his solicitor. Asking for my proposal about settlement. Another words, asking us betrayed to show our cards first.

My solicitor said no way. He has already shown he is not engaging in full dislcosure about marital assets. So it is now his responsibility to disclose, not mine.

Meanwhile, I am waiting. I hope this is working in my favour.


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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I think she means that you zip your lip and say nothing.

What do I think about his email? I think that he is showing, as ALL waywards, that he doesn't respect you or your wishes. You have stated clearly how he is to communicate with you, and he is taking advantage of you not being able to block him at work. Typical.

Are you still actively looking for a new job? My guess is, not.

You would do sooooooo much better if you didn't have to work with him. As much as you don't believe it, your workplace is a HUGE trigger. You already have your home as a trigger, so now you are constantly triggered.

Plan B isn't just about NC. It's a state of being. Without the NC, you can't begin to reap all of the benefits of a true Plan B.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
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Originally Posted by Caracal
Originally Posted by starfish75
Originally Posted by reading
Zip back at him.

Have your lawyer handle any legal stuff.

Reading:

What do you mean "Zip back at him?"
"zip" means nil, nada, nothing.

For what its worth, I think my WH has tried the same thing, just through his solicitor. Asking for my proposal about settlement. Another words, asking us betrayed to show our cards first.

My solicitor said no way. He has already shown he is not engaging in full dislcosure about marital assets. So it is now his responsibility to disclose, not mine.

Meanwhile, I am waiting. I hope this is working in my favour.

I hope it works out for you! Yes, I agree he is not being honest and why would I expect anything different him? He thinks I'm naive and I'm getting so much stronger. He has his financial paperwork to complete and as usual he thinks he can get out of this too! I don't think so Mr. Wayward! Funny how he's asking me about what I want out of the divorce, but never asked what I needed or wanted from him and our marriage. Laws, vows, promises, honesty and integrity mean nothing to him. He thinks he can continue to manipulate me and I won't allow it anymore!

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Originally Posted by Scotland
I think she means that you zip your lip and say nothing.

What do I think about his email? I think that he is showing, as ALL waywards, that he doesn't respect you or your wishes. You have stated clearly how he is to communicate with you, and he is taking advantage of you not being able to block him at work. Typical.

Are you still actively looking for a new job? My guess is, not.

You would do sooooooo much better if you didn't have to work with him. As much as you don't believe it, your workplace is a HUGE trigger. You already have your home as a trigger, so now you are constantly triggered.

Plan B isn't just about NC. It's a state of being. Without the NC, you can't begin to reap all of the benefits of a true Plan B.

I agree with you Scotland!
My workplace is a trigger for me at times, but I'm gaining strength and ignoring him... pretending he doesn't exist. I really wish I could find a job that pays what I'm currently making. I have friends who are currently job hunting with no luck, so it doesn't seem that it's a good time right now. I'm keeping my eyes and ears open though.

My house is a trigger too, but I've removed all pictures, artwork, etc. the furniture triggers me at times, but I can't do anything about that right now. I originally thought I might want to keep the home, but I'm thinking a fresh start might be good for me? New things, new memories...

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Spoke with my attorney's office today. My attorney said that if we are able to get some things settled between us before court/mediation, it could be in our best interest. Not sure what to do... I feel that he is going to take advantage of me. I guess I could deal with the assets, but I'm not going to handle the money situation, retirement accounts, etc? Any advice?

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Get a financial advisor. Get recommendations from your attorney.
Then, decide whether to mediate or not...depending on the scenario you discover.

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Star. This is was what I found on the internet...along with the recommendation of speaking to a professional in the divorce field.

Quote
Don't Sign ANYTHING

Many people have made the mistake of signing papers or preliminary agreements which later caused the outcome of property and custody battles to be decided against them. You may be signing something that no attorney can modify later. Don't do it! If your spouse wants you to sign something, politely say you'll be glad to, but your attorney has "ordered you not to sign anything" before he or she has a look at it.



ME: BW
HIM: FWH
Married 18 yrs
DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008

Recovered

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Is anybody having problems listening to MB radio? It says it's playing, but there is no sound. I even deleted the app and reinstalled and still having issues. Just curious if anybody here is having the same issue?

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Originally Posted by starfish75
Is anybody having problems listening to MB radio? It says it's playing, but there is no sound. I even deleted the app and reinstalled and still having issues. Just curious if anybody here is having the same issue?
Try this.

Having Trouble listening to Radio clips: Try this


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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I have problems listening to it with the app on my droid. It will play for a few minutes and then stop. I don't know if that is what you are talking about. I don't have problems with it in my computer.

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I finally got the radio station to work later in the day.

I'm not going to sugar coat anything here, it's been a rough week!
WH has been emailing me numerous times this week and I haven't responded once! He told me that I have 1 month to find my own car insurance when our policy expires. He then tells me he's coming by the house "to see the dogs" on Wednesday, which he did, but he also went into the office. I put a keyed lock on my bedroom door so he can't go through my things anymore like he did last Friday. He went through everything... nightstand, my clothes closet, everything!
He emails me again yesterday requesting that I leave the iPod docking station or the alarm clock docking station for him on the kitchen counter for him to pick up on Friday at lunch. He said I have all of the stereo equipment and he has nothing! He said he needs something to listen too! Of course, I ignored him. He emails me again today and says since he hasn't received a response from me that he assumes that I'll leave the iPod docking station out for him tomorrow. Again, no response. I'm taking a 1/2 day tomorrow and praying that he doesn't come over.

Saw him driving down the street tonight and turned down OW#3/whore/co-worker's street, so I'm sure he went to her house this evening.

I'm proud of myself for not responding to anything! Our mediation is scheduled for Mid-September. I'm not giving him anything until then! I'm not sure what to do if he comes by tomorrow. He's such a coward/conflict avoider, so I doubt he will come in if he sees my car, but I'm trying to plan in case he does. Why is he doing this crap? Why can't he just walk away and wait patiently until our mediation? Why all the demands?

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He's trying to find the path to opening a conversation with you.
He wants to push your buttons, but he can't find them. So he will keep trying.

Thats why email through work has to cease.
Would your boss support some type of IT solution? Blocking him from emailing you? He has no business purpose, and if you told them he's trying to conduct personal business through company email they may work with you to end it.
Then you could be in a proper plan B.

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Star why does he have access to your house!!!!!!

Don't put a lock on the BEDROOM door. Put one on all of them!!!!

This is exactly what he's been after the whole time. Access to a fix of home.

And tell his supervisor he is harrassing you at work!


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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Star, breaks in Plan B are painful.

But there seems to be ways that you can avoid these breaks. Others have posted what steps you could take.

I think Lexxxy has your WH pinned about why he tries to contact you. And look at what it has done for you and your healing...

I am interested to know why do you want to expose yourself to this pain?

And when will you putty up all of the cracks in Plan B?


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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