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Joined: Oct 2005
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Just a quick comment...

Maybe you could boot the cars? I wonder if he could show up on the property with a tow truck and remove a car (or two or three). Absent a filing, seems he can enter the property and will and tow "his" cars wherever he pleases. But maybe not if they are booted.

In the alternative, get some of those "Clubs", and put them on the steering wheels of the cars he's most likely to try to take. That should stop him from driving one off the property in the middle of the night himself.


Sorry you are going through this.

Mr. W


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
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lew, i don't know how you are financially off, but can you put the vehicles in a storage shed (you know, like a warehouse)?

and you're not waiting. let him be angry. keep up that plan a for now.

is it pep's line? "how was your day honey? i'd be happy to discuss our M when you have ended your a. want a cookie?"


fBW 49
xWH 55
DD 22
DDay 6/07
D 8/15
Letting Go
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Well, he will text me or email me from time to time wanting something out of the house, but refuses to see me in person or talk on the phone. I left a letter in his stuff he came and got a few days ago outlining what he would have to do to come back. He just doesn't want to come back, at least not yet. He says he's going to come get 3 of the cars this week. I really can't stop him, he already has the keys, and I can't afford to do much with my surgery in a few weeks (I have to pay up front since it's elective) and attorney fees. If he screws me over, I will be ok, and he will have to deal with his own conscience-assuming he still has one. I assume that's why he refuses to meet me in person or talk on the phone. He's trying to avoid the guilt.

Last edited by LewSully; 08/20/12 05:25 AM.
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What sort of surgery?

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Originally Posted by LewSully
I left a letter in his stuff he came and got a few days ago outlining what he would have to do to come back. He just doesn't want to come back, at least not yet.

Was the "at least not yet" was in his response?

You'll need to dissuade him of the thinking that you'll always be there waiting to take him back. Know what I mean?


Me (BH)
FWW
Married 2000, DS 8, DD 6, DD 2

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There was nothing preventing my estranged WH from just taking my pickup (which was mine before we married and I paid for it) so my son installed a hidden kill switch on it...worked like a charm!


Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
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Remember you aren't waiting, you are just working your three week Plan A like a rockstar. It is YOUR plan to give it three weeks.

If he's too dishonest and uncommitted to man up for his marriage in that timescale = his problem.

He still gets a chance to turn it around in Plan B, but it will heal you no matter what.

Protect those cars!


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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Originally Posted by Pepperband
What sort of surgery?

LapBand. I was trying to loose weight before I knew or marriage was on the rocks because I knew it bothered him. It may have been too late to benefit him, but it will still benefit me!!!

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Originally Posted by Northwood8900
[quote=LewSully] I left a letter in his stuff he came and got a few days ago outlining what he would have to do to come back. He just doesn't want to come back, at least not yet.

Was the "at least not yet" was in his response?

You'll need to dissuade him of the thinking that you'll always be there waiting to take him back. Know what I mean? [/quote

No, he said "divorce is what's best". I'm just hoping, I guess.

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Yeah divorce is not as easy as he might think, giving up is never easy.

He isn't quitting a bad job, or even just a habit.

He will have a chance to turn around in plan b

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lew, can you keep the pink slips?


fBW 49
xWH 55
DD 22
DDay 6/07
D 8/15
Letting Go
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