I finally (after 7 months of separation and trying to do Plan B) wrote the Plan B letter and sent it...<P>What I need to know is if you always send the letter to both the S and OP as in the book it was done?????<P>I got a "Thank You" back for the nice letter, in reference to the Plan B message. I guess it was the affirmations of love and the fact that Im waiting for a good outcome in this mess... I really don't know.... <P>Anyway, If any of you are putting off the plan B letter, maybe this will give you the incouragement you need to finally just DO IT.. I put it off far too long and have hurt myself in doing so.<P>Thanks for any and all responses!<P>cozy

I surely missed something.<P>You sent off the plan B letter to H, and got a thank you back for it? Can you elaborate?<P>TNT

you would have to see the full event of the last week I suppose... H was across the border with OW, and that was when we had the volley-battle of the e-mails.... Anyway, I instead of retaliating to his nasty (I posted some of it) e-mail, apologised for I know I set myself up for getting hurt by expecting something positive when I had gone to MIL's. Anyway, I left it at that, and said that we need not talk again, I am far too devastated and I hope he enjoys his life...<P> I also have to admit that I have been very stingy on the "I love you's" for this last 7 months, and trying to maintain a distance from him and not allowing too much contact, he felt very uncared about... <P> He had a fuss again with OW because he wont move in with her, and she of course accused various things...Love busters... H in turn started thinking about me...(Always looks greener on the other side of the fence) and sent me a virtual -----/-----\---<@ red rose and told me he knew we had a spiritual bond and with OW it was just a emotional one and that he was being greedy and not thinking of anything but the present, and forgeting what the most important, long lasting reality was.... But didn't finalize still with OW...<P>So I sent a plan B letter in the body of a Love (I remember our first kiss 10 years ago) letter, with a note at the end that I would respond to his email.... BUT I really needed him to abide by the e-mail I sent please!<P>If you read the plan B letter, and you have been trying to implement it just by applying a cold shoulder, the letter comes off quite poetic and mushy.... Weird huh?<P>Sooooo, H will probably try and call, and instead of just hanging up or ignoring the phone, I am going to say.. Hello, I love you, have you finally ended your affair..... If the answer is no I will say, Im sorry then, I can't talk to you..... If its yes, I'll say, Where are we meeting..... <P>I'll send the e's that lead to this to anyone who would like to see this strange metamorphisis, just give your e address... You guys would never believe that the first could lead to this present situation....<P>cozy<p>[This message has been edited by used2Bcozy (edited November 03, 1999).]

mncon99@yahoo.com<P>

tnt its all sent.... you may have gotten more than you expected....hehehee<P>Now I need to know if the plan B letter is sent to both parties in the affair????<P>Someone let me know please!!!<P>cozy

I'm not sure - but I think the plan B goes to just the spouse, and the "end contact" letter goes to the OW.<P>I read the email you sent. Wow, this guy still loves you and wants you.<P>It sounds like you need to work on being predictable and consistent in what you say to him.<P>He wants to please you, he wants you to be happy with him, but he's lost confidence.<P>Your plan B letter was soooo touching. I understand now, why he would send you a thank you.<P>He's starving for you, Cozy! <P>Have you found a counselor? Maybe call your pastor and start some counseling with him. I think this marriage has great potential.<P>Keep your eyes on the Lord, and you will be able to be consistent and protect the relationship.<P>God Bless You. <BR>TNT