That would be me BH.

I think she got a hold of one of my earlier emails but they were still able to answer my question.

Just sent the Harley's my mailing address.

I listened to it before and will need some time to listen again.

So what did they say? Do they know she's moved out?

Ok so I listened.

So what do you think? Pretty much what we've been saying don't you think?

So did.you write her the letter like they suggested?

Yes, he said basically everything ya'll said. I think the only thing new was the information about the WW possibly never feeling remorse for what she has done. I guess I kept reading a lot of post where the WS had remorse and said they were sorry for what they done and I think it really made me expect mine to do the same.

I need to suck up my pride and anger and resentment towards WW and start meeting her needs.

Working on the letter, will post soon to get your opinion.

Sorry BH for being gone for 11 days but had to get some things worked out. She has now left me with paying for the mortgage on the house so I had to take time to figure out how to do that.

Also took this time to listen to Dr. Harley over and over again. I have finally realized that she will probably never show regret for what she has done and I just have to get past that if I'm going to save this marriage.

I will get back to work on the letter that I began to write before I had to stop and handle the money issues. I also will start to read Love Budgets, the book the Harley's sent me.

I think there may be a chance still because of what she said in her last email to me after I exposed to her friends.

How long until you get the letter written?

Here is the letter I have written BH. Please let me know if there is anything I need to add or take out.

Dear WW,

I want to apologize to you for my part in creating an environment that helped make what happened possible.

I foolishly pursued my own choices without understanding my responsibility to meet your most important emotional needs. I was not there for you when you needed me the most, and we are now both suffering for my mistake.

I am willing to avoid the mistakes I've made in the past and create a new life for both of us that will meet your needs.

I have thought about it for the past couple of months and not talking to you has made me miss you even more. I miss you and everything we had. I loved the way you smile and laugh at the things I done and said. I miss cuddling with you and playing with your hair. I miss the way you would listen to anything I had to say. I'm speaking from the heart when I.say I miss everything about you.

I would like to know what I can do to be a better husband and father. I would like to know what my mistakes were so that I can fix them to create the marriage we deserve, the marriage you deserve, the marriage I promised you seven years ago. What can we do to create a loving marriage that we both will love to be in and our kids will be proud of and learn from.

I have already started to work on some of my mistakes and the others I would love to fix if you let me. I will need a chance and my loving wife by my side to be able to work on some of these problems. I hope and pray that I get this chance and that you understand that these mistakes that I made are ones that I can correct with the help of my loving wife.

I want to once again apologize for my mistakes in the marriage and foolishly wasting time on things when that time should have been spent on you.

I loved you when we married and I continue to love you and will always love. Those are the vows I took and I will honor them with all my heart.

With all my Love,
T2C

Looks good. Send it.

How are you doing on your conversation with her? Are you sending daily texts? IC is one of her top EN. So what's your plan to meet this.

Sent email, waiting on response. Sent her flowers today, no response though. Maybe I will get more out of email.

Let me know what you think BH of her response.

If I need to tell you your mistakes, then you obviously have not been listening to me when we have talked. I have told you repeatedly what the problems were. I should not have to tell you again. Our marriage is over. You cannot trust me. You have said it several times. I cannot trust you. I have said this multiple times. You sent random facebook messages to people broadcasting our situation saying that you want to reconcile, but your actions and words do not match up. I cannot work on this marriage with you becuase 1. I don't love you any more. 2. If I did, you are paying attention to what I am saying to you. You don't respond to my emails or texts about the children. You miss having a woman take care of you. You can find that again, eventually, but it won't be with me again.

I need some strong hard advice, I fixing to go off the deep end and make her pay for everything she has done.

Honestly,t2c, I would hang it up. I'm not trying to embarrass you by saying this, but this thread could be used as an abject lesson on how NOT to do things.

Seriously, you've been told what to do and when to do it, and then you wait weeks to implement what you've been told? I don't know what you were thinking by not taking the advice given, but that thought process has led you to where you are now. You have trickled this out for months now, and you have caused nothing but what I feel is irreparable harm to your marriage because of it. We tried to tell you.

Please, don't do anything stupid. It's not worth it. As it's been said before, the best revenge is living well.

Concentrate on that.

What do you mean by "making her pay" ?

Not to be offensive Viper but I have read where people have done it the right and the marriage fail, I have read where people have done it the wrong way and the marriage fail, I have read where people have done it the right way and marriage recovered and I have read where people have done it the wrong way and marriage recovered. My opinion is that I think it is up to what the WS wants to do. No matter what you do if the WS doesn't want to try and recover then the marriage will fail no matter if you do it right or not.

And New Path I am not talking about hurting her unless you count her losing her job as hurting her if what I am researching right ends up being true.

Ok then. May I ask what is it that you are trying to do? The only person you control is yourself and how you respond to her nonsense. My WW told me all kinds of hurtful things for 6 months and then one day she was normal again but it was short lived. Point being is you have been given a plan to follow and that's all you can do.

I am trying to recover my marriage but I can't break through her foggy nonsense. She has brought great pain to me and our kids. She doesn't have to listen to my youngest say I don't want to leave Everytime it is time for them to go back to her.

MARCH 23 2012



T2C

Sorry to be blunt. This has been dragged out so long I can't even follow you any more.

Your wifes LB$ has been closed since late March and still is today from the return text you posted earlier. Very hard to get a LB$ account open after that much time and lack of action on your part has passed.

Sorry.

nESRE

Have you been back in contact with your lawyer?

I would proceed with D. She has been stringing you on long enough.