My goodness, Yuki, you and your MIL are infantilizing your wife terribly, it's shocking. I actually feel quite indignant on her behalf! As Nesre said, she's adult enough and healthy enough to have not one but two affairs. She's compos mentis and fully responsible for all of her actions.

MelodyLane is right: if you do not expose, you condemn your wife to suffer even more depression and stress. That she is very stressed already is evidenced by this:


Your poor wife. Be her knight in shining armor, Yuki. Expose TODAY! Don't think about it. Send those letters TODAY. Your wife will thank you for it one day.

Yuki

There are a lot of natural brain chemicals that are released when a person gets involved in an A. Those chemical scramble the brain much like an addict using drugs.

Do a search on pea brain chemicals.

Your wife is much like a drunk/addict right now. She is getting her high off of another man (possibly 2?) and these natural chemicals flood the brain. This is why waywards in general act so crazy and seem to loose all common sense. Why long term men 50 something years old M'd many years end up with a 22 year. Why woman leave a secure long term M to be with a scumbag loser who really has nothing to offer in comparison to their long term H. Neither of these make sense. The chemicals scramble their brains just like an addict.

Now just imagine you 2 are out for a night on the town. W has too much to drink and insists on driving. You only had a couple of drinks and are OK to drive. Against your best judgement you let her drive. You start out and you see this isn't good. Weaving back and forth on the road. Totally misses a stop sign and drives right through. Hits the shoulder of the road a couple of times.

Do you debate with her about her driving abitilty at this point?

Or Do you sit on your hands just closing your eyes praying you will get home safely?

Or Do you sit and worry that she will be upset with you if you DEMAND that she stop the car and you drive.

What if WE crash? What will happen to US?

Or Do you stop the car. Take the keys and drive so you will have the best possible chance to arrive home safely?

Which would be the most loving solution?

Your best chance to arrive home safely is evident.

Your best chance to save this M is also evident in the solid MB's advice you were given.

I truely hope you to take the keys away (expose-follow MB program) from your WW and drive. Use the best choice presented here and stop worrying if she will be upset/angry/do something crazy. She already is. She will be upset/angry/crazy regardless even if you do nothing. If you do nothing she will alsoremember you did not care enough to even try to stop her. She already has a scrambeled brain as evidenced by the phone call to MIL. Trying to make sense out of her fogbabble is useless since she is drunk off the A at this point. Busting up the A is the first step so the chemicals quit flooding her brain.

Expose. It is your best choice and chance to keep this M "on the road and safe in the long run"

nESRE

Genius!

What will not win her heart back is her lack of respect for you and being a doormat for her.

Guarantee that 100%.

Not trying to be harsh, walked in your shoes. I know how it feels.


Exposure and standing up for yourself including showing her you have self-respect and boundaries is your best chance my friend.

MB only works when you follow every single step.

Please listen to the vets and the advice being given. It works.

Il give you another take on this.
From what you have been telling us about your wife.Not many people would put up with her lines and so on.

Let OM1 And OM 2 have her for now. The wont put up with here crazy [censored] for long.
Vacation over.She will bang on your door..Make no mistake she will

Please read.
This darn MB plan sucks!....It failed

Yuki

Following MB's plans is way better than this................

Is this better?

nESRE

Yuki,
I can see you haven't posted since everyone responded. They are right, you know, you are rendering yourself ineffectual, which isn't an attractive quality to a wife. She needs someone who stands up for her enough to believe in her, not enable her bad behavior. Someone who can say "I know you are better than this and we have a marriage worth fighting for!" She has her ways to cave you in so that you won't affect change. Do something about it! Fight for your wife, for your marriage!