I stopped mc too, but the counselor we had was not buying the fog and the blaming and the finger pointing. He was on my side (not that he chose sides, but he did say I did nothing to deserve this and wouldn't buy fog excuses). He even refused to see WH again as long as he was still seeing OW in anyway, even in passing. He said she needs to be 100 percent gone before he would even consider working with WH again. So not all counselors are going to be a bad idea but I can see how some might be.

BW: Me, 42
WH: Him, 41
ILYBNILWY: Sept 2011, he moved out
DDay1: Dec 2011, ongoing since at least April 2011 if not longer
WH moves back we try FR 1/12
DDay2: Feb 2012
DDay3: April 2012, WH moves back out to "find himself"
Many attempts at FR, he can't make a decision
5/2013: WH states he wants a Divorce. POSOW is insisting.
8/2013: He files for D. She got hers, where's his?
Current: nothing is progressing, we do not speak