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Please don't feel guilty. The loss of a good man to death is a tragedy, but we can have faith that it isn't forever. The loss of a good man to a bad man is more devastating, because left unchecked, the loss of that will last forever. So really, it's because of your faith that these two losses have hit you differently. You have an understanding of the deeper issue involved, of dying with Christ vs. living without Him. I'm so sorry about your dad, and thankful that you'll see him again.  Neak, I think you hit it right on the head. I also told my mom that it's a lot harder for her to deal with my father's passing because he was a part of her everyday life, where he wasn't like that for me. Bampot was a part of my everyday, so removing him from that seemed to bring up many more triggers than my father's passing. I'm not my usual self, but I'm not as bad off as I was last week. Progress not perfection.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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{{{{{{{{{Scotty}}}}}}}}}}}
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I am so sorry Scotty. (((Scotty)))
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(((((Scotty)))) You, your boys and family are in my thoughts and prayers. You are an amazing mother and I know you will do everything to help your boys come to terms with and grieve the loss of their grandfather. Their love will also give you the strength you will need during the coming days and months ahead. I think Neak summed it up nicely. It is a different type loss and the way we grieve and our emotions can be different. Be gentle on yourself .... although I understand to well how you feel. Isildur's current actions overshadow my grieving procees for my mother. Thank you for sharing your mother's thoughts and feelings, it helps having this perspective. 
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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Me - 30 (FWW)
H - 30 (BH)
DSx2
D-day: 2008
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Sorry for your loss, Scotty.
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Scotty, I'm so sorry to read about your loss.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I am very sorry for your loss.
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What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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I'm so sorry for your loss. My prayers go out for you and your family.
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I just read your thread and wanted express how sorry i am for the loss of your father. Your family is in my prayers
Truth can stand on it's own two feet....A lie needs support....FRM
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 Happy Birthday Scotty, I hope you have a great day (hope I've got the time zone right) and some pampering time.
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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Happy Birthday and Merry Christmas, Scotty!
You are obviously a very special woman with a heart of gold.
Peace be with you.
Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Scotty!!
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Happy b'day Scotty!!! You truly are priceless. I miss you Mama B(ear) 
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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Scotty Happy Birthday and have a truly loving family Christmas with your children and Mum, friends and other family.
I have just caught up with a bit of MB today and wish to extend my and Aussies sincere sympathy for your Dads passing.
Lots of love from both of us
Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.
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Happy Birthday Scotty! 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Thank you all for the birthday wishes. First birthday without my dad, and it was hard, as I expected. There were some bright moments, and I got to spend time with the close family that I have left. Christmas is going to be hard as well.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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catching up on threads, and am sorry to see i have to wish you good birthday tidings at the same time as expressing sorrow for your loss, scotty. i'm so sorry.
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