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I am not cheating on any body!And I can never think of it even if something is hurting me. You are cheating with the husband of another woman. What don't you get about that? YOU are cheating HER. Simple math. Think about it. 1 + 1 = married couple. 1 + 1 + 1 = infidelity. There's only room for two people in a marriage. And your male friend IS MARRIED. You are NUMBER 2.
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I again had a conversation with him,I didn't picked up his phone all day and the end he asked me to meet him ,he wanted to talk about something I felt. BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T CHANGE YOUR NUMBER. AS I ADVISED YOU TO TWO DAYS AGO, when I really tried to believe that you were sincere. I'm done here. I won't deal with a woman who is playing us and trying to get us to accept her. You are the OTHER WOMAN. 
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I BROKED MY SIM...AND NOT HAVING ANY NUMBER RIGHT NOW...I'll buy another one. I WENT FOR AN INTERVIEW TODAY TOO,MAY BE I WOULD GET A CALL. I JUST WANT TO ASK HOW CAN I FULLFILL MY OWN EMOTIONAL NEED. SO THAT I WOULD NOT NEED ANY ONE OR WOULD NOT GO ON ANY OTHER WRONG TRACK AGAIN. JUST TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO TO OVERCOME ALL THIS AND HOW CAN I RECOVER.i AM GOING TO MY PARENTS PLACE FOR SOMETIME.aFTER A WEEK OR TWO,I will think what to do next and how to do. 
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What you should do is go to the married man's home and tell his wife what you have done to her. Then promise to never contact this scumbag again. NEVER take his calls again.
That is what you should do.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I JUST WANT TO ASK HOW CAN I FULLFILL MY OWN EMOTIONAL NEED. SO THAT I WOULD NOT NEED ANY ONE OR WOULD NOT GO ON ANY OTHER WRONG TRACK AGAIN. Date thirty people who AREN'T MARRIED and select the one who does the best job of meeting your emotional needs and marry that one. Don't have sex until you are married, because according to Dr. Harley, sex complicates your thinking and makes it difficult to make an intelligent decision. You can't fulfill your own emotional needs, but you need to pick someone to do it who will be devoted to you for life. People who are already married are already taken, so you need to pick someone who is not married. JUST TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO TO OVERCOME ALL THIS AND HOW CAN I RECOVER. Read everything on this site and follow every suggestion. Go up to the top and read through basic concepts, every page, then read every page under Q&A under the "how to survive infidelity" section. Then start working through the rest. Use this as your personal recovery program. You will not recover if you are so lazy that you are unwilling to educate yourself, or if you are so lazy that you are unwilling to follow the suggestions.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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I BROKED MY SIM...AND NOT HAVING ANY NUMBER RIGHT NOW...I'll buy another one. I WENT FOR AN INTERVIEW TODAY TOO,MAY BE I WOULD GET A CALL. I JUST WANT TO ASK HOW CAN I FULLFILL MY OWN EMOTIONAL NEED. SO THAT I WOULD NOT NEED ANY ONE OR WOULD NOT GO ON ANY OTHER WRONG TRACK AGAIN. JUST TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO TO OVERCOME ALL THIS AND HOW CAN I RECOVER.i AM GOING TO MY PARENTS PLACE FOR SOMETIME.aFTER A WEEK OR TWO,I will think what to do next and how to do.  Jais, stop posting in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS. We've already TOLD you what to do. Now, tell US what you have done. Have you contacted slimeball's wife to let her know that her husband is screwing around on her? Because I assure you, madam, that she will be very surprised to hear that. What have YOU done to get yourself out of this mess and escape with any self-respect? What have YOU done??
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I've only read the first two pages and all I can think of is "grow up". I seriously don't mean that to be derrogatory, I see that as your problem. You are needy, want someone else to be responsible for you, then wonder why you attract the wrong kind of person. You need to work on yourself if you want to attract a different kind of person. Read "Buyers, Renters, and Freeloaders". I found help with Christian Carter's "interviews with dating experts" as well. (I don't agree with all of them, but gleaned a lot, esp. from one named Paul, the rest I let go of.)
As others have stated, you need to work on establishing some better boundaries. Do NOT consider a married man! And when you are married, do not consider anyone outside of your marriage!
You need to work on living and surviving alone, and eventually work your way up to being independent and establishing enjoyable activities in your life. When you do eventually meet someone right for you, you will have something positive to bring to the equation.
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
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Okay, now I've caught up on the thread. And he said "blah blah blah blah." It doesn't matter what he said. He's a cheating lying husband to another woman and you are an accomplice to his bad deeds.
Stop excusing and participating in drama. Heed the good advice that has already been given you here. To do less is to waste everyone's time that they could be giving where it is listened to. Do you understand that? You are responsible for YOU and no one else is! Get a job, move away from him, change your number, make yourself inaccessible to him, and don't date for a while. Spend time working on yourself, learning. You say you don't want to hurt anyone but you have and continued to do so even after learning your error. You have to first have respect for yourself and establish boundaries before you can expect the same from anyone else! If you want to work on yourself and effect a change, there will be those of us here to help walk you through it. But don't placate and ignore us and waste our time. There is great material here, learn it!
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
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FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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U all are and were right that was me only,who was not believing on the things in front..My heart was not exepting. But thats two it was not execpting because,I am a selfish person thats true...I dont wanted those things to be true..
I was seeing things in front of me..But was not believing and wishing him to be true.All is my falt..
I deserve these [censored] things.Yes I do that is why all this happense to me. I go
I SERIOUSLY FEEL SORRY FROM DEEP OF MY HEARTB FOR YOU ALL AND TO MY OWN SELF AS WELL .. U all tried a lot to make me understand he is a very very big lier and a jerk.But Shameless me was not accept and wish it to be incorrect.I was listening to him.
And see what i became.I lost my self respect,my dignity.
I want to show him on his face that he is a lier a big lier. He deserves a big tight slap on his face.Such a jerk. Now I understand after analySing everything and after listening to u all.He is an snake,double faces snake?dual personality.
What ever he told me,if any single bit of it would have been true,his wife would have left him lot many years ago.
I am sorry for behaving like this with you all. I dont know,U all will help me now or not,that up to you.
Yes alis,u were right,I was hearting his wife his parents and my own self.I m the worst person in this word.I was doing this because i was wishing him to be true,but he was never.
He is a cheating husband and a cheater.My god says he is a lier. And a truthfull person never hides anythings...
Well I dont know where his wife is,I am just trying to find her out to tell her the truth on his face.Like a tight slap on his face then only I'll be able to calm down.
Now i understand I have to care care of my own self other wise i'll keep on meeting such vultures.
I sorry Friends.For ignoring you,if i did.I was not able to accept because believed that god can never do this again with me.but..
I AM SORRY TO YOU ALL,REALLY I AM AND TO MY OWN SELF TOO
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will Comeover this MESS soon. All these 10 12 days since 1st oct(when i got to know all these things till now, made me mad and crazy.It was my birthday huh.  and will be buyer only.Will not take any help from any one,as i was before when I came here. well guys all is my fault
Last edited by Jais; 10/12/12 02:36 AM.
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I already have answers how to do it,in the previous posts. thanks for guiding me right way
thanks for stillbeing with me
Last edited by Jais; 10/12/12 02:37 AM.
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U all are and were right that was me only,who was not believing on the things in front..My heart was not exepting. But thats two it was not execpting because,I am a selfish person thats true...I dont wanted those things to be true..
I was seeing things in front of me..But was not believing and wishing him to be true.All is my falt..
I deserve these [censored] things.Yes I do that is why all this happense to me. I go
I SERIOUSLY FEEL SORRY FROM DEEP OF MY HEARTB FOR YOU ALL AND TO MY OWN SELF AS WELL .. U all tried a lot to make me understand he is a very very big lier and a jerk.But Shameless me was not accept and wish it to be incorrect.I was listening to him.
And see what i became.I lost my self respect,my dignity.
I want to show him on his face that he is a lier a big lier. He deserves a big tight slap on his face.Such a jerk. Now I understand after analySing everything and after listening to u all.He is an snake,double faces snake?dual personality.
What ever he told me,if any single bit of it would have been true,his wife would have left him lot many years ago.
I am sorry for behaving like this with you all. I dont know,U all will help me now or not,that up to you.
Yes alis,u were right,I was hearting his wife his parents and my own self.I m the worst person in this word.I was doing this because i was wishing him to be true,but he was never.
He is a cheating husband and a cheater.My god says he is a lier. And a truthfull person never hides anythings...
Well I dont know where his wife is,I am just trying to find her out to tell her the truth on his face.Like a tight slap on his face then only I'll be able to calm down.
Now i understand I have to care care of my own self other wise i'll keep on meeting such vultures.
I sorry Friends.For ignoring you,if i did.I was not able to accept because believed that god can never do this again with me.but..
I AM SORRY TO YOU ALL,REALLY I AM AND TO MY OWN SELF TOO
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Joined: Jun 2011
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What you should do is go to the married man's home and tell his wife what you have done to her. Then promise to never contact this scumbag again. NEVER take his calls again.
That is what you should do.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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As I have changed my nbr,He called on my roommates nbr and wanted to talk to me.I denied,again he call 5 to 6 times and begging to talk to me,When i took the call.he said he want me to meet his wife to clear all the doubts.!!!!!!!???
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As I have changed my nbr,He called on my roommates nbr and wanted to talk to me.I denied,again he call 5 to 6 times and begging to talk to me,When i took the call.he said he want me to meet his wife to clear all the doubts.!!!!!!!??? This man is married. It does not matter what he says to justify having a relationship with you. You should cut off all contact and leave him alone. This isn't a difficult concept and you're making this worse by accepting his calls after he begs. Nothing good will come of this and the sooner you realize that, the better.
Age - 35 Divorce Final - 3/5/12
S - 13 S - 10 D - 8
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again he call 5 to 6 times and begging to talk to me,When i took the call. Oops, you didn't follow the advice. It said "Never talk to him again."
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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As I have changed my nbr,He called on my roommates nbr and wanted to talk to me.I denied,again he call 5 to 6 times and begging to talk to me,When i took the call.he said he want me to meet his wife to clear all the doubts.!!!!!!!??? 'Click' is the only answer he needs to hear. Then you walk over to the mirror and smile at your reflection: "How DARE some lying married man ask me to meet his wife? I will never meet any boyfriends WIFE because I WOULD NEVER DATE A MARRIED MAN. He lied to you!!!! So just remember 'click'. People who want to be free to date GET DIVORCED. And don't give another date to anyone who ever tells you a big lie of any kind. You had the right to avoid dating and developing feelings for someone who was married. But he didn't care about your choice, so he just lied you into bed.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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He is playing you and you are allowing him to do so.
No man is worth being the other woman......not even IF his wife didn't care.
Really.
You have such small regard for yourself.
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As I have changed my nbr,He called on my roommates nbr and wanted to talk to me.I denied,again he call 5 to 6 times and begging to talk to me,When i took the call.he said he want me to meet his wife to clear all the doubts.!!!!!!!??? Oh, for crying out loud. What do you not get, here, Jais? Look at this! Your boyfriend wants you to talk to HIS WIFE! WHAT????? If I were in your shoes and some guy said that to me, all he would hear is the sound of my feet, beating a path to the nearest far-away place. He wants you to TALK TO HIS WIFE??? 
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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