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#2674503 10/16/12 10:59 AM
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I think my wife and I need some me time just me and her no worries no issues for about a week hell maybe two but with bills and 3 kids it is rough. I just felt like sharing this thought.

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How has your progress in on discovering an affair? Have you found anything and have you exposed?

You are correct that "UA time" (no worries, no issues, just me and her time) is critical to marriage recovery, it is a very basic principle of MB, but she will not be receptive to this when active in an affair (and then it will be a work in progress).

alis #2674516 10/16/12 11:40 AM
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i have no new intel phone records clean recordings are empty maybe i was just being paranoid so for now i guess no news is good news lol.

we did talk this weekend and i did mention we need some alone time and she was rather excited and she said she would love that

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Do you know about UA time? What it is, what it means? MB says that 20+ hours per WEEK is required to build & maintain romantic love in a marriage that is struggling

alis #2674520 10/16/12 11:48 AM
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No i dont know what it means i was about to look it up. Whoa ! 20 hours a week not sure i sleep that much in a week lol

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Originally Posted by Acheron9719
i have no new intel phone records clean recordings are empty maybe i was just being paranoid so for now i guess no news is good news lol.
"lol"?

She had secret a meeting with a "childhood crush". What happened there? Why are you so confident that this had nothing to do with an affair?


BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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I am just trying to think on the bright side.

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Originally Posted by Acheron9719
I am just trying to think on the bright side.

But that's not a helpful strategy. Are you inventing your own plan here, or are you here to learn a plan that will work?


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
markos #2674579 10/16/12 01:54 PM
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Show of hands: how many here just about lost their marriage due to "trying to think on the bright side"?


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
markos #2674584 10/16/12 02:06 PM
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I am not inventing anything. The advice i was given I am using I brought a var and I tapped the computer just nothing happened this weekend so....

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Originally Posted by Acheron9719
I am not inventing anything. The advice i was given I am using I brought a var and I tapped the computer just nothing happened this weekend so....
What is your plan to get UA time?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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IDK trying to figure that out now


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