It's never too late.
Especially in your case.

I should have done this years ago. Heck the one attorney that she was involved with is now a judge. The "Honorable".....what a joke. I probably could have gotten him in a lot of trouble.

Six yrs of inaction..my God...how are you mentally stable?

Personally I think you should just rid yourself of her.
But if you want to have a good marriage you need to follow the program and exposure is needed. Treat the judge as anyone else. Expos� to his wife and family

He's not healthy. The sick ways of others will affect those around them and we betrayed spouses actually become sick when we start enabling the behaviors by protecting them from natural consequences

Oh teacher.. Me! Me!

We just keep plugging. That's what real men do..They just keep loving the unlovable

Oh it's notover yet Rock, you have a long way to go. Dr Harley talks about the difference between men and women and How men can last longer in these kind of situations than women, bit there is still damage done, that you will have to work out, internally and emotionally

You seeing a therapist buddy?

Rock,

How long should it be before you probably shouldn't expose anymore?

Most BSs would appreciate someone, anyone, coming forth with the truth about their marriage. Since you WW likely picked other serial cheater OMs they are likely still at it, so please do their wronged spouses a favor.

If only one of the witnesses in the know had come forth to you when your WW had her first affair you might have avoided a great deal of this pain.

God Bless
Gamma

I am going to try and talk to someone. I definately need some help.

One thing to consider.
You could file for divorce and explain you will be getting full custody.
If she fights it you will issue court summons to every one of her affair partners as witnesses of adultery.

Talk to the Harleys! They'll give you the only help you need. Send an email using the link to "Coaching centre" at the top of every page here.

Email your questions to Joyce Harley at mbradio@marriagebuilders.com. When your email question is chosen to be answered on the radio show, you will be notified by email directing you to listen to the rebroadcast. If you would like to consider being a caller, include your telephone number. You will be called by us to explain the procedure to you. Every caller will receive a complementary book by Dr. Harley that addresses their question.

Ok. So what do I do now?

Rock, have you told anyone at all about any of this? Anyone? Are you seriously telling me that you have completely let her off the hook for acting like a trollop all these years?

Nothing?

I have no idea why you refuse to stop abusing yourself in this manner. It's very difficult to have sympathy for someone that continuously allows someone so callous, indifferent, and uncaring to keep on destroying them in the fashion that she has done. Hell, no wonder she continues to engage in the behavior she does. What reason does she have/had to quit? It's been what, 6 years, and here you are, right where you were when you started. You said it yourself.....


And how did that work for you? Women do NOT respect men that allow them to walk all over them, and that my friend, is you.

Okay, back to your original question:


Stop being a doormat and start manning up. You have been rolled from the beginning until now, and it won't end until you grow a pair and fight for your dignity. Your marriage is all but done (actually, forget the but in that sentence), so I would focus my efforts on what you can recover.

Your self respect.

File for divorce on grounds of adultery, expose this crap to EVERYONE for what it is, and let the chips fall where they may. Let her wallow in her adultery publicly, not retain happy memories of her little illicit liaisons.

X2 for now, more manly, and that's not a wisecracks either Viper, beatings when I get to my PC so I can quote

Your self respect is all you got left, she flushed that down the crapper, is not gonna fight for you, so you have to do that

Believe me I know how slippery and tricky the snake can be, but rock they will feed off you as long as you let them, and freedom is your choice, and it is also there, when you take it

Feel like I'm talking to the king who was possesed in LOTR.

Time to get a hold of yourself Rock

1thing at a time Rock
Expose to everyone

Rip off the crappy bandages covering this travesty to marriage, to descent human behavior and respect, stand up for yourself and say no more

Do that first, and do it completly, and leave no stone unturned.

That's the first thing Sir.

One thing at a time, kill the proverbial snake, and if nessesary, get a lawyer who can protect you in the process, find one who hates snakes too, and knows how to protect you

Read all over this forum on how to expose, nevermind the parts about future recovery of the marriage, I think that ship has sailed, now you have to worry about your recovery Sir

Thanks for all your advice. I see that everyone thinks that I should get a divorce.

You are getting melodramatic. Not everyone thinks you should divorce. Plenty of people have directed to you Dr H but ALL are in agreement that you should do something. If you don't then why bother to complain? And yes that is a serious question.

After six yrs as a registered poster, I think most/all people expect you to make decisions and have some understanding of what to do. No?

8-26-12




Still my advise today. You make the choice. Not me.

Another poster asked what you get from the M and I never saw an answer. Care to answer now?
nESRE

I'm not trying to be melodramatic.
I know that I didn't follow any type of plan here for years now. How I wish that I had done things differently back in 2006. But I was stupid, naive, in denial. I believed her time and time and time again that she was done. I remember her coming here and someone even asked her who she was doing. She again denied everything.

So for years I looked the other way. Hoping that she was done. There were red flags everywhere. I knew that someday I would need the truth if I really wanted to move forward somehow. So I finally laid it out there and asked her. I was surprised that she had been involved with 11. 9 being PAs.
I've still been walking around in a haze lately.
She claims, yet again, that she is done having affairs. I'm at a loss.

Ok, sorry about the babbling. What do I get from the marriage?
Well, in the last few years, heartache. There is a constant pain in my chest. I can break down and cry, and do, at any particular moment.

She doesn't want a divorce. What keeps me is probably our long history together. I wanted to make this marriage work so bad. Also the fact that she used to love me. I hang on to the past.
I'll stop for now.

This is my personal opinion.
You are in a TOXIC relationship.
I encourage you to visit a counselor.

You cling to a toxic relationship.you need help seeing that and getting away from the sewage that you live in