Looking for advice on how to stop my wife nagging me. Yesterday while she was sleeping alone in the house,she does night work, I went out and left the door unlocked. Ok, so it's not the first time, but this time all hell broke out. She just wouldn't let it go. She said I always make excuses when I apologize to her and it doesn't come over as sincere. It is sincere, but she uses the fact that she has been raped 3 times in her life as an excuse to try and tell me she's scared to sleep with the door unlocked.

I did apologize after a long time but I'll be damned if I give her what she needs when she needs it.


Her Mother died 14 months ago and just before that happened my wife caught me watching teen porn which she says was frightening to see the age difference between them and me and that if I had to do that why not adults. I'm only 64. They were 18, or so the place said, my wife said she did not think so.
Anyway, I swore and promised to stop it and blamed her for it at first. I still carried on doing it and had no idea she knew. I handed her my ipad for something, which she gave me last anniversary as a gift, and when she opened it she was just in shock at the video confronting her, but I blamed her and yet two weeks later she still crie about it balling on and on about how I betrayed her trust and did all this while she was sleeping or working. She said she read my body language and that I no longer gave her any affection and thats how she knew. She talks such utter garbage that I tell her I hate her guts and just want to get the h*ll out of here.

She says she cannot grieve her mother while she feels she has lost her marriage. I finally agreed to give up the porn, but I told her last night that I can get it anywhere I want as I'm smart. She talks a lot obout not wanting her life anymore, not seeing any point in living so I asked her what kind of grave she would like. lol. I was joking.

Anyway, I'm sick of her nagging and carrying on with her crying and sobbing. How can I manage her? How can I shut her up?

She doesn't sleep much and when I ask why she says she's having nightmares.

I do admit I called her a F****B F****C F**** mad woman and what not, but I do that now and then and always apologize later, but she deserved what she got.

I would like some good advice on how to control her emotions.

Thanks,
David

David,

Are you sure you aren't a bored 18 year old? Because this post is not real and it is too over-the-top to stir up a good troll debate. Why give away your game with the first hand? Scale it back and try again.

My post is real. I am offended to be told it is not real.

Then you need anger management counseling because you are an abuser.

My wife says that, but it isn't true. She pushes my buttons and makes me angry. I can't put a foot right or please her. I don't know what is wrong.

Why can't she just let things go and realize they are past? Why keep bringing up two week old issues and crying over them?

1st sign........she made me do it, she makes me angry....ie it is her fault.

Domestic violence studies/workers/counselors/therapists would state otherwise. You are an abuser, and that is just the parts you wish to share with us.

You don't understand. I crack after hours of her crying and sobbing. I don't crack straight away. I have done sometimes, but no, not often.

Once she gets onto something she won't let it go until she hears what she wants.

She says she wants me to know I am an emotional abuser inside myself and then we can work on our marriage from there, but unless I can see it there is no hope.

Is that not her abusing me?

What is wrong is that you are a jerk. It is upsetting her. What should she do about that?

Can you work on not being a jerk?

But mommy......she started it....

Wow. what a crowd pleaser! I bet you have the women lined up at the door for some of that action!

Do you think anyone would want to marry a creep who acted like that? Would anyone want to marry some pervert who gawked at teen porn?

Then how do you think you can keep a wife and behave like a CREEP? YUCK!!

Where am I being a jerk if all she goes is go on and on? I was joking with her about the grave thing, but she took it wrong. She then said it was passive aggression and not funny as she is diagnosed with depression. She uses anything.

Are you also a salami slapper?

Sorry, but what's that?

What do you do with your right hand while your left hand is clicking on links or turning the pages of the magazine?

(Or vice versa as appropriate. I wouldn't want to discriminate against left-handers.)

If you want her to stop going on, then stop being a dirtbag. When you upset her, tell her you are sorry and comfort her. Start remembering to lock the door and don't forget again.

Stop being a creepo and looking at porn.. Stop abusing her. Stop calling her names like you are some punk juvenile delinquent.

Real simple. Stop abusing your wife before she dumps you.

So you're saying its true that the porn thing is still hurting her? She says the worst part was because I demand a monogamous relationship from her and she sees it as a double standard, and that what I did it on on the ipad she gave me as an engraved gift from her hurt her deeply.

Would that hurt that much? That it was a special gift from her?

@Sugar, no, I don't!

Why are you asking US? Ask your wife. WE are not married to you. If I were married to you, you would be frog marched to the front door at the point of my gun.

I came here for help, even if I am wrong. Not for judgement or lectures. You are sitting like a judge and jury.