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I don't care what questions they ask. what ever rocketqueen has chosen. Witch I believe she already has.

KISS


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Neak,

how are they polar opposites? Luvsdavid asked me about my actions in court today and I thought I was answering the question. I believe that she was recurring to me being defensive and argumental. I Was trying to relay how I would be . I will be more careful answering questions.

please let me know what you mean because I'm confused

KISS

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I have listened to yesterdays marriage builders radio Broadway twice. I have missed pieces her and their though. I will promise to listen everyday

KISS

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Originally Posted by kiss
I have listened to yesterdays marriage builders radio Broadway twice. I have missed pieces her and their though. I will promise to listen everyday

KISS

That's a good step.

Don't expect to become an expert without spending a lot of time in class!


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Brainhurts,

1 I'm going to take the lie detector test
2 post constantly
3 set up my check to be direct deposit into our joint account
4 continue to apologies to our friends and family
5 give her the time she needs to heal
6 do anything else that rocketqueen asks
7 also anything that is asked of me through my thread

KISS

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Markos,

I have spent probably 12-15 hours here the last three day.

kiss

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Originally Posted by kiss
I will give her what ever she wants. (As long as it isn't a divorce)

And once again, you miss the boat...


BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Originally Posted by kiss
Brainhurts,

1 I'm going to take the lie detector test
2 post constantly
3 set up my check to be direct deposit into our joint account
4 continue to apologies to our friends and family
5 give her the time she needs to heal
6 do anything else that rocketqueen asks
7 also anything that is asked of me through my thread

KISS
1. When is the poly?
2. Posting=check
3. When?
4. Why do you need to keep doing this if your actions are showing?
5. How much?
6. What has she asked? What were her conditions to you?
7. Ok

What Extraordinary precautions have you set up? Are you still texting opposite sex?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Brainhurts,

1 lie detector test can be time in a week. I just spoke with the guy doing it. its $575. I need to get money back from my parents as rocketqueen told me it was $200. I have less then $500 in my account and I will need it for a room.for the next week and a half till pay day. I van also draw the rest of the money from my 401k in about a week.

3 It will be active probably November 23. I get paid bi weekly

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When thinking of court, what is on your mind is not the heartbreak your betrayed wife feels at being brought to the place where she must separate for her own safety and sanity. It's all about you...YOUR sad feelings, how YOU might break down, how YOU might look silly.

This isn't about you being more careful how you answer questions - that wouldn't be honest, would it? This is about changing the wrong thought patterns that are spilling over into your words. Being more careful how you answer isn't the solution. Being more careful of how you think is a start.

As is setting aside your own pain, in favor of what is best for the family that you have destroyed. Instead of the "poor me" mentality that will continue to come through no matter how you try to hide it, remember "poor them", and do what is best for them no matter what you want for yourself.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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5 What ever she needs.

6 no just the lie detector test is all she asked besides her original plan b letter

KISS

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Originally Posted by kiss
1 lie detector test can be time in a week. I just spoke with the guy doing it. its $575. I need to get money back from my parents as rocketqueen told me it was $200. I have less then $500 in my account and I will need it for a room.for the next week and a half till pay day. I van also draw the rest of the money from my 401k in about a week.

This is the type of thinking that will cause your marriage to fail....


You need to schedule the poly now!

Your parents can transfer/wire the money to you in less than an hour to anywhere in the country. You just need to get it done and look for immediate solutions not excuses for delay.


Your marriage cannot survive more delays.....

or is there more information you need to come clean about prior to the poly? Is that why you are delaying??

Last edited by HerPapaBear; 10/31/12 01:11 PM.




Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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Kiss, OK I am seeing some action which is great.

I would respectfully tweak your attitude regarding where you said 'I will give her anything she wants (except a divorce)'

This is thinking about yourself again. Its great to want your marriage, its great to OFFER a recovered marriage, (and we all hope it happens) but you can't DEMAND she stay in it. Refusing her a choice is not just a pressure tactic and turn-off, its wrong. She's entitled to a divorce after all she's been through. At this stage you should care that she gets whatever makes her happiest, even if its divorce.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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Kiss,

I'm posting a link to another recent waywards thread. He disappeared and doesn't want to discuss the questions I asked him.

His requirements were, I believe, the same as yours.

So read it and lets start discussing those same things I've asked him, OK!

Click here for link





Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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Just left court rocketqueen want to keep.perusing the order of protection. so the judge asked if we each wanted attorneys. Rocketqueen said yes. I declined. the judge told me how foolish that is on my part. he advised me probably 7-8 more times to seek representation. I still dexlined. Then rocketqueen told me don't be stupid get a lawyer. I still declined. THen judge asked if I had any experience in a court room because he will be looking for witnesses. I said no. Then he made some comment about me screwing it up. I replied I have screwed up for a year now!! I told her that I will give her what ever she wants. now he set a return on January 7th.



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You sir are an idiot if you chose to not have an attorney.
I wish we could represent ourselves, but you are going to get killed, unless you have experience yourself.
I believe you have to make amends, but that does not mean rolling over and taking it the hard way.

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I fully support giving her whatever she wants. However, I also have to recommend an attorney. The forms are a maze to negotiate, and you need someone who knows what they're doing. You'll just need to make it very clear to whomever you hire, that they work for you, and are there to help you see that your wife is taken care of fairly.

But please, get a lawyer.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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**EDIT**

Last edited by CicadaMB; 10/31/12 07:51 PM. Reason: TOS: Please familiarize yourself with Marriage Builders concepts
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Originally Posted by Neak
I fully support giving her whatever she wants. However, I also have to recommend an attorney. The forms are a maze to negotiate, and you need someone who knows what they're doing. You'll just need to make it very clear to whomever you hire, that they work for you, and are there to help you see that your wife is taken care of fairly.

But please, get a lawyer.
I agree.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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She is using it as a tactic. I agree 100 percent. if inflicting pain on me helps her heal or give us a glimmer of a chance. I'm willing to take the risk.

KISS

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