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She's at our house with our 3 kids. 16, 15, 12.
Please be patient with my slow post. I'm at work on my phone.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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She's at our house with our 3 kids. 16, 15, 12.
Please be patient with my slow post. I'm at work on my phone. Ok and you're staying where? Do your kids now why you're gone? Did your wife give you any conditions?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I'm staying at a co workers. I have no family close. The kids know were taking a break. The only condition is I don't initiate contact. I'm supposed to go to the house on Saturday to evaluate where we are. I'm scared to death she's going to say she wants a divorce. I'm not going to try to get her to let me stay because I need more counseling for my controlling behavior. I need to make sure I'm ready
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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Joined: Nov 2010
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I'm staying at a co workers. I have no family close. The kids know were taking a break. The only condition is I don't initiate contact. I'm supposed to go to the house on Saturday to evaluate where we are. I'm scared to death she's going to say she wants a divorce. I'm not going to try to get her to let me stay because I need more counseling for my controlling behavior. I need to make sure I'm ready Do you talk or see your children? One huge action would be to sit your kids down and tell them the truth. Take responsibility to them. Do you have AOs? What love busters are you guilty of? What were her complaints of you before this? This OW was she married? Did you tell her husband?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Excellent radio clip where Dr. H talks about what a WH should do for his wife to give him another try after his affairs. He explains it like an addict. Radio Clip on a WH on what to do to get back with his wife 3:50 mark
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I text my kids all the time and my wife is adamant about not telling them about the ow. I'm guilty of every love buster. Her big complaint were the angry outbursts
Not sure what ao's are
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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Yes the ow is married but I've no way of getting hold of him.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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Joined: Jun 2008
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Even worse, 2 yrs ago we found out our oldest daughter was being molested by a friend. My wife says I abandoned them by losing myself in work. That's all I did was work. I let her deal with everything.
We've only been separated a few days and I'm having a hard time not finding out how she is or what she's doing.she keeps getting more and more upset with me. Do I stand a chance? Or is it hopeless? I go to the doc for meds tomorrow and later the counselor Your situation is not hopeless but pushing your wife is not going to help you. You have been having a hard time for a few days....she's been having a hard time for YEARS. Get yourself together and DO things that your wife can SEE which may give her reason to re-consider divorcing you. Words are cheap. Hounding her is not going to win her back, so stop it.
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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I text my kids all the time and my wife is adamant about not telling them about the ow. I'm guilty of every love buster. Her big complaint were the angry outbursts
Not sure what ao's are AO=angry outbursts Are you in an anger management program for this? Read these. What to do with An Angry Husband Anger Mgmt 101 What are your wife's top emotional needs?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I would say affection and conversation
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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When can you listen to this?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I listened to it, but my wife seems focused much more on the angry outbursts than the affair. And I'm not sure how to get her to give me another last chance.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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I know I have no right to ask for it, but I pray she can find the energy to try again. And I need to find a way to make permanent changes.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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I know I have no right to ask for it, but I pray she can find the energy to try again. And I need to find a way to make permanent changes. Have you signed up for an angerbusters program? Do it, if you really want to show her. Did you listen to the anger mgmt radio clips from Dr. Harley I posted? Have you read these? Angry Outbursts #1 Angry Outbursts #2
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Yes I did and I am also in counseling. I can do great for a couple of months then I just slip back into old habits. She has no reason to believe I can change.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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When she decides she wants to discuss us, how can I get her to give me a chance.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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Yes I did and I am also in counseling. I can do great for a couple of months then I just slip back into old habits. She has no reason to believe I can change. So what's different this time? Why should she believe you this time?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I know my actions do that, but I'm scared to death I won't get that chance.
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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Posts: 20,479 Likes: 6
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When she decides she wants to discuss us, how can I get her to give me a chance. You can't. You can only control you. You have to show her that these changes you're making are for real. If she decides to divorce you, you need to respect her and continue to work on yourself. If you are for real and are finally making the changes for yourself they will stick. You have to do this for yourself and to teach your kids. Are you?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Living without her and my kids is definitely an eye opener. I miss them all a lot. I always thought I was strong enough to change on my own. Now I know I'm not. I'm going to counseling and although she is pissed that I ordered the books love busters and his needs her needs i would like to implement them into our marriage.o
I wish I could turn back time....
Cher
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