Tonight I asked if we could calmly talk about what has been going on. He said ok.

I then told him that I was not feeling loved from him and that he was really hurting me with his behavior. I said that we really need to work on this and that he needs to stop going on Craigs List and other Web sights soon or he is going to have to move out because, I can't do it anymore. I can't let him cheat on me anymore. He started yelling at me and saying its not cheating you F...... B... I calmly said it is cheating in my opinion and it is unacceptable to me. You have told me that you didn't follow through meeting up with these people and even if you didn't and Im not sure that I believe that; it is still cheating to talk to someone else about sex and look at pictures of them.

Then I asked about the guy he had emialed about meeting and if he had really had oral sex with men. He said he is not gay and that if I asked him about it ever again that he would hurt me and he got up in my face like almost touching me and I put my hands up just to keep him from coming closer he grabbed them hard and threw them against the wall and said dont touch me. I wasn't touching him until he pushed against my hands. I was protecting my self It was really scary he was right in my face and screaming and he pushed me. He is 6 ft and Im only 5'5". He hasn't been physically violent before. He refused to even talk about it or admit anything.

I said, Can you agree to stop this behavior or not? He wouldn't answer me. If you don't stop this behavior you are going to have to leave because, it is not fair to me. We both have to want this. He said if he leaves he is talking all the money and I won't get anything. I said you would really do that to our kids. He said ya so you couldn't have it. I told him the state web page said he would be required to pay 952 a month in CS. He said I'll quit my job before I give you that. I said the judge would side against him if he did that durring a divorce or sepetation and he would not get joint custody anymore. He said he didn't care he didn't have rights anyway. He stormed out of the house and went to work early.

Wow what a disaster tonight was I just wanted to talk calmly about this and tell him my expectations and he yells and gets up in my face to intimidate me. Says he is not going to give me one red sent if I leave him and he will quit his job so I wont get any help from him. WTH

Empty threats due to fogbabble IMO I'm sure the vets would agree. Not sure if you exposed yet. Remember it will make him furious. It's the weekend wait till the vets chime in. My wife told me that she hated me and wish our son was never born. That I did this to embarrass her after I exposed and promised to tell my job that I beat her up when it wasn't true. It never happened of course. So expose watch him get angry and bait you to argue stay calm and tell him I have a plan to create a loving marriage where both of our needs are met.

Get a restraining order, including your kids, get him ordered out of the house and require that he get a psychosexual eval before having anything other than unsupervised. He was sexually abused as a child, you were too, and he does not have a healthy view of sex. How can you feel your children are safe around him? Do you feel safe around him?

Has he ever forced you to do anything sexually that you didnt want to?

If you don't handle the threats from him in a way that protects your kids, it could impact YOUR custody of your own children down the road.

Why did you say he was "hurting you" with his behavior? I don't understand why you would use such soft, minimizing language to describe the hell he has been putting you through. You also wrote "we really need to work on this" as if you shared the responsibility. Why? He is 100% responsible for his behavior and he is the only one who can change it. You said he needs to stop cheating "soon" or else he will have to move out. Why did you say "soon" instead of "immediately"? You also said "it is cheating in my opinion." Why did you qualify that statement with "in my opinion"? His cheating is not a matter of opinion; it is an objective fact.

Please understand that he cannot simply quit his job to avoid paying alimony and child support, and he cannot walk away with all the money, leaving you and the kids destitute. I recommend that you go to the bank and withdrawal money. Then go to another bank, open an account in your name only, and deposit the money. (If your kids have bank accounts and you are the sole guardian on those accounts, then you could simply move money into your kids' accounts.) Next, call your local Domestic Relations office and explain that he has threatened you; you are afraid of him; and you need legal counsel and a restraining order. If you give Domestic Relations his social security number, they will be able to attach (garnish) his wages. If you don't get a restraining order immediately, take your kids and get out of that house. He has been abusive with you and shown reckless disregard for your kids' welfare.

Your kids need you to fight back. Do it.

You are not safe. It doesn't matter that he's never been physically abusive before; now he has.

You need to get yourself and your kids to safety, and then sort out the rest.