Yes it's crazy talk

That's the focus of this thread right?

It has been revealed that what makes us laugh, is when something happens, that makes absolutely no sense

Our rational mind reacts with a realease of a sort of madness, laughter. We just can't believe this is happening, it defies all logical conclusion of a predetermined end.

So the saying that you either laugh or cry

I would rather laugh, but as serious as you take those crazy people and still love them, care for them, and then they do something as unthinkable as... You name it...We are still shocked because we dared to believe and were let down?

Yeah I hear ya, what kind of profession ? The oldest one is the world

"I'm very busy visiting my nephews." (Four - five times a week)

"You've taken away time I wanted to spend with my nephews."

I love my nephews and nieces too, but not that much.

Classic! On top of that, it was surely YOUR fault!

Driven2, you must be acquainted with my WH! How else would you know this?!?

WH said I was needling her into threatening my life.
I must be SO POWERFUL! ... Anyone need a jar opened?

"If we'd had kids, I wouldn't even be thinking about divorcing you."

I'm going to have a doozy tonight--got 2 1/2 hours of audio "evidence" to transcribe. The fogbabble was so thick, I could barely see what I was writing down.

Oh don't worry, it will allways be your fault. You can count on that, unless they have a moment of clarity
Which as you can see, you know what they will do with that moment, without guidance. They seek freedom from what has happened in life that has the potential for growing up, but they defer to having fun and running away
Just like a child who has not taken ownership of thier own life and given it over to some invisible magic power and feigns misunderstanding.

They really are lost, and by thier own doing, bought the lies that give them comfort.

But in the end all is known and revealed, allways

OM1 was her sort of boyfriend in 2004, before we met. She then had an EA with him in 2008 and again in 2009.

BH: "I hate to ask, but how far did you go [in 2004]?"
WW: "Some groping, and that's the extent of it, honestly. We slept in the same bed once, but nothing ever happened. It was purely because of the fact I couldn't get over the fact he was very obese."

We got marride in 2005. In 2006, "Our friendship was like any friendship--there was no emotional connection." (Other than the fact they'd slept in the same bed in 2004, and they had an EA in 2008!)

"One thing I want to tell you about OM1 is that he was way more into me than I was into him."

I have an hour and 45 minutes of audio to go through, and I've gotten through about 12 minutes. I've got plenty more of this coming.

"You are not the woman I want."
"She LIKES kids."
"She's a great woman. They're a great family."
"I might as well leave, now that your family knows."

-Those from D-day

I cried all night, tried to throw him out. He said "I understand that." when I told him he had to end it with her or not go to sleep in our house that night. He went to sleep in our house that night. I could've killed him. My son stopped me.
*****************************************************************
Then later:
"I couldn't tell you because I didn't want to hurt you."
"I'm with you just for tonight. Can't promise anything after that."
"The switch is hard to flick."
"I was going to try...with her." (Now he says "I wasn't really trying like I shoulda been, with you.)
"I need to talk to her with no one else around."
"I still love her."
"I committed my love to another woman." (Hearing that one hurt real hard.)
"I gave up on us"
"Just don't wanna fight anymore."
"Want to be with someone I've never hurt, that I've never said those thing to."

One of my favorites.

FWW: "You know, on D-Day, if you had said... You know what FWW, I get it and if you want to walk out the door right now, here�s the key. You have every right, every reason. And if you could have done that at least, maybe not that day, maybe, a few days or weeks after. Where you could have been like, you know what, bless you. ...then maybe I would have gone OK, he gets it. And maybe I would have been more interested."

In other words, if I had just been sincerely apologetic on D-day for everything I did that caused her to have an affair with a 19 year old, and had actually given her my blessing to leave the marriage and destroy our family -- then maybe she would have been more interested in trying to salvage our marriage.

How can you argue with logic like that?

Like my Gramps used to say, " Never argue with a crazy person"

And the good book says not to follow a fool into folly, or you become as foolish as they do

It's a waste of time trying to figure them out, and sadly, they stick to thier bull like they were right all along. What a tangled web, and they make it, then become entangled with it, and then others have to drag them out of it,

The best thing is to let them have their fantasy and fall flat on thier faces, and stay the heck away from thier twisted minds

It's allways the children who suffer if someone in thier life is not grounded

"My life is over." (After her mother found out about the affair)

"I'm never going to be able to do anything fun that I enjoy again." (regarding EPs)

"You hold in your hands the complete power to crush and destroy my life." (because I said I wasn't going to voluntarily support her for four more months)

You are hysterical! And you just beat me. By the way your WH sounds a lot like me despite the age difference!

"There have been a lot of problems with e-mail accounts getting hacked."

"These are really good passwords. I'd rather go and change them first, instead of telling you what they are, so I can use them after our relationship is over."

That's hysterical...

Qoheleth, just wanted to share that I found making and studying transcripts of wayward dialog when I was in the thick of it to be very therapeutic. This "wayward fog" phenomenon is not a trivial psychiatric condition: it's extremely serious. In my story it lasted nearly 15 months before FWW began to snap out of it. Keep the faith. The good news is -- she will snap out of it eventually, it's only a matter of time. Bad news is, nobody can tell you when...

Thanks. I've got hours of this stuff to analyse. And I'm doing FB exposure right now, which is slow and boring. (I lost my desire for revenge or to hurt anyone a while ago. It's now just a chore that needs to get done.)

My WW told me, "It was never about him. I thought about you when I was with him."

I think my mouth actually fell open.

Besides fogbabble do you think that this one is a real obstacle in their mind? I mean I could picture even my self thinking it.

My WH just said this the other day, and we are supposed to be in recovery....
"POSOW would have been a good friend to us both if we hadn't of done what we did."

Oh yeah that's a classic denial statement. "It's not my fault, boo-hoo, she is so nice you know"

Yeah it's the waywards fault, but they can't help themselves..

"Oh jeez I'm sorry, I thought I was married to someone who was responsible and accountable for thier actions, didn't know your brain was so soft, you shoulda warned me up front, that it all was conditional"
Hoping your recovery goes well, and that foggy thought process gets kicked to the curb ASAP

"I've heard that OM2 is very depressed these days" (post-exposure)

"My dad would NEVER sold you that car over a year ago for $1,500 if he knew you weren't going to let me keep it in the divorce!" (note: she ended up keeping the car and I never wanted it in the first place)

"I didn't tell you I applied for a job because I thought you'd be mad." (I'd encouraged her a week before to apply for a job at that place.)

"If [male friend's name] meets you he will get violent and want to beat you up. He's a hot-head."

"I just will feel too stressed if you meet any of my friends."

Best of all:

We had been separated 2 days earlier and our divorce would be final 29 days later. All of us (her, me, her therapist, her parents, etc.) agreed it would be best for her to wait until the divorce was final before hanging out with OM2 anymore.

I drove by her parents' house and observed OM2's car. I needed to call her about something else.

Me: "Hey, are you with OM2 right now?"

WW: "I'm not"

"Why is his car at your parents' house where you slept last night?"

"Oh, well, he just left."

"Okay, why did he come by?"

"My ukelele was in his car. He was just dropping it off."

"Are your parents aware he came to their house?"

"No."

[few more minutes of talking]

"I will stop seeing him. I need to do this for myself."

Ha!