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Joined: Oct 2009
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Our Wedding Vows:

I Optimism, do solemnly swear to give you, Nature Girl, the promises of Care, Protection, Honesty, and Time.

I promise to do my best be your primary source of happiness at all times.
I promise to protect our love by doing my best to avoid being the source of your unhappiness.
I promise to be open and honest with you at all times.
I promise to take time to give you my undivided attention.

I promise to abide by the Policy of Joint Agreement.

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Originally Posted By: optimism
MBers,
I'd like to thank everyone for their support over the past years, taking me from the depths of hell during my exww's infidelity and now through some difficult tests in the dating world - utilizing MB methods to frame a loving relationship and navigating the pitfalls of plans and preparations for blending two lives/two separate families.

We all give the time we can to each other in an effort to give back some of what we have gained by sharing our stories and implementing the hard advice we often impart on each other. We do this without expectation, but because we're compelled and inspired by our belief in an approach that can ensure happiness between two people.

I can assure everyone who has contributed with their words to me that you have shaped my thinking and have given me a better understanding of the MB philosophy. In reading thread after thread and seeing the comments of the new to experienced posters, I have gained an understanding far beyond what I would have from just reading the material. My sincerest thanks to all for that!

Tomorrow Nature Girl and I will be married in a very small civil ceremony. I know she's the one for me. Not because she's beautiful and smart and kind and good to my kids. Not because she's sensitive and caring and sweet and thoughtful. Not because she shares my interests and ideals and also appreciates our differences. I know this love will last because of the way she has taught me to handle conflicts.

On many many occasions in the last two years that we have disagreed or otherwise come to an impasse, we have been able to calmly discuss our positions and use safe negotiating/communicating (and often POJA) to come to a mutually satisfying agreement.

I'm looking forward to spending the rest of my years with NG. She has shown an enthusiastic willingness to implement MB strategies and with that in our favor, I'm confident we will continue to experience a life and love that will grow... with Love Banks overflowing!

opt

As always opt, your words are wonderfully written. I enjoy reading and learning from your posts.

CONGRATULATIONS to you and Mrs. opt(NG). I for one, am very thankful for you both sharing your journey.

hurray dance2


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Congratulations to the both of you.


"Get busy living, or get busy dying"...... The Shawshank Redemption.
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Congratulations.
May God richly bless your marriage And new family

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Opt, you chose the right woman for the right reasons, so I know that you'll have a wonderful marriage. Enjoy smile.

AGG


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Congrats!

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Congrats to you and NG. Wishing you many blessed and happy years together. loveheart


BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Wonderful ... So amazing to hear great recovery stories. I hope to follow in your footsteps!!!

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Is this you guys?
Radio clip on Marriage


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Originally Posted By: BrainHurts
Is this you guys?
Radio clip on Marriage

Yup, that's in response to a question I sent re: vows. I didn't find anything on the site or specific things in the books. We wrote ours based on I Promise You and this radio clip. It worked very nicely. In fact it was great to say the words looking into my bride's eyes and truly believe what I was saying, where they came from, and how effective those promises are.

Thanks to all Well-Wishers here!! We had a very quaint wedding on the beach with a little mist in the air, but otherwise decently warm enough and overlooking a beautiful bay of the Atlantic. Just a few family members joined us including NG's daughter. We went to lunch with my MIL and FIL, then out to dinner later.

We will take a little honeymoon later and have been offered a "weekend away" by some very nice friends.

thanks again everyone!

opt


Me: 43 y.o. BFWH, D-day 11/11/09 (NC since 9/01)
Divorce from WW final 9/16/10.
Current Status: MB-based Marriage to Nature Girl 12/8/12 (first date on 12/11/10)
Mine: S(16), D(11)
NatureGirls: S(23), D(21)
Another EA Story
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Congratulations to both of you!


Me 40, OD 18 and YD 13
Married 15 years, Divorced 10/2010
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Hi Optimism, Ive been busy for a while, just checked in here, and youre married?!! Awesome!!!

Sounds like everything worked out perfectly for you. Congratulations to you and NG!

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Well holy moly! I step out for a short while (well okay, for about four months I guess) and look what happens: Opt gets himself hitched!

Congratulations, Opt. I followed your story right from the beginning and was very envious that you found someone in NG. Not resentful, mind you, but sort wishing that the same would happen for me. No such luck.

But this is your thread (maybe I'll go and update mine), and I'm delighted to read how integrated you and NG have become with Dr. Harley's program. I hope you will continue to present yourself here as the shining example of success with MB principles you are!

I love success stories!


Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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Wow - congratulations you guys!


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 17 years, who is a beautiful angel.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Thanks Fred, markos, KL, and NED!
Being a buyer suits me. smile

opt

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Hey Bro, congrats. I know I've come a little late to the party, but the well-wishes are heartfelt. What a wild ride we have both been on for the past 3+ year, eh? All the best to you and yours.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
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Originally Posted By: Scotland
Hey Bro, congrats. I know I've come a little late to the party, but the well-wishes are heartfelt. What a wild ride we have both been on for the past 3+ year, eh? All the best to you and yours.


Hey Scotty! I neglected to get back to you, but thanks for the well-wishes.
It's remarkable what can develop with patience and perseverance. I like how we all would consider ourselves in a better place than we were when we started our MB journeys; but mostly that we have, in one way or another, helped each other understand more thoroughly than we could have on our own.

It's hard to describe the inspiration one can draw from someone like yourself. Seeing you persevere with integrity and adherance to what is right is...encouraging. So much so that it transcends any particular situation. You are a credit to MB, Scotty, as well as the many folks whose lives you touch!

opt


Me: 43 y.o. BFWH, D-day 11/11/09 (NC since 9/01)
Divorce from WW final 9/16/10.
Current Status: MB-based Marriage to Nature Girl 12/8/12 (first date on 12/11/10)
Mine: S(16), D(11)
NatureGirls: S(23), D(21)
Another EA Story
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