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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 129
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 129 |
This is too all of you who said I should take my husbands effort of an apology and be thankful he was still at home.<BR>He said he couldn't be sorry because we wouldn't be where we were if it hadn't happened.<BR>We are in the same place! He can't be sorry because he's not willing to change or admit fault or attempt to meet any of my needs, yet it's all about how he feels.<BR>This is short, but I am through! I don't think I will be back. I just want any betrayed who's spouse won't admit guilt or remorse to know it's because they are not ready for it to be over. They won't aplogize because they won't stop!<BR>M<P>------------------<BR>Mater<P>
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 290
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 290 |
Mater:<P>I know exactly how you feel. My h said to me that he was sorry I was hurt, but that's not the same as saying he's sorry he hurt me, or that he regretted having an affair. Totally different meanings, don't you agree? <P>He's never shown remorse because as I have always felt, he still wants to be with her.<P>Sorry about how you are feeling. It's truely the pits!
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Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 484
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Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 484 |
I really feel for you and understand the pain and frustration. My H said the same...and told me that he was not with OW (a lie anyway)but if i was not good enough to him, she was waiting for him, but if not her, there would always be someone else (young, no responsibilities i.e. children etc).<BR>Until there is a sense of true remorse then it is still in limbo unless you decide to do something. I read somewhere there can be no forgiveness in the true sense unless the "apology" is given properly (i.e. actions speak louder than words) It is so convoluted and bizarre behaviour.<BR>It is all about themselves
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 3,045
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 3,045 |
hello m and tl, my h said that he was sorry that he hurt me. Nothing initially about being sorry for the affairs. It took a while, but the remorse did come. I know it is hard to do, but if you can find some compassion and patience it may be the time it is needed. Hang in there. (((hugs)))
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Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 1,050
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Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 1,050 |
Even if you don't want to be with him right now (maybe you need a Plan B to help you keep what love you have left), please stay on the board for support. If you do decide for Plan B, you have no idea of the pain you are about to have. You really do need the support of the MB family.
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