Has anyone gone through a divorce and after some time reconciled with their former spouse and remarried? Do you know a couple that has? Please share!

Welcome to MB.

Yes there are some. Would you like to share your story?

Have you read these?
Should I Remarry my Ex-spouse? #1
Should I Remarry my Ex-spouse? #2

Thx for sharing the links BrainHurts. I'm just starting on this road, divorce is about 6 months old. Living together for 6 years, married for 3. I'll be happy to share the specifics if anyone is interested. But let's just say the love is still there and while I go down this path of finding myself I have hope...I'd love to hear stories from others that have gone through this and ended up reconciled successfully. It's not the be all and end all but it is something I hope for...

Any children?

Was there an affair? Are you the exwife or exhusband?

Are you still in contact with your EX?

Are you doing research - for a book or TV programme?

4311, why did you get divorced if the love is still there? What happened?

No, I'm not doing research. Well, then again, I guess I am but this is for ME.

We don't have any children and I am the ex-husband. No, not really still in contact. We live in the same area, go to the same gym, etc, so we see each other in daily life and say hi her and there but nothing much. The divorce is still pretty raw. I guess I'll share it all:
We met 20+ years ago and were high school sweethearts. Met in 7th grad, that's when I fell in love with her. We became an item in 9th grade and you couldn't take us apart right through high school. After graduation we ended up going to different colleges and broke up first year - the long distance relationship was too hard for two young kids started a whole new life so far apart from each other.
Fast forward 20 years. She was the one that reached out. I was the one who got the "is this you?" email in his inbox. At that point we both had already been married and divorced, she had a child. I was in Canada, she in Texas. After the email, we went back and forth via email for a couple weeks, then the phone conversations started then meeting in the second city. After the meet we knew what we were going to do and did it. I moved to Texas, we got married after living together for a couple years and it was bliss for about 5 yrs. Then the trouble started. I think it follows the standard divorce story. I was stressed with work, wasn't really "living" my life and trying to expand on things. She dropped hints her and there but never came out and actually told me that she needed me to get more involved in life or she would become unhappy and then one day she dropped the bomb. And here I am.
We have always seen each other as soul mates. Something I've learned through all this is that being a soul mate is awesome and amazing. The connection we have is beyond anything I've ever felt. It started in 7th grade and never stopped. and what I learned was, that's not enough.
If you think about it there are two words that always get put together as the two most important things: Love and Life. I had the Love thing down. I didn't realize it but I was not living my life to anywhere near a full degree. That's what broke things down.
To sum up, my problem was not seeing that I wasn't living life enough and not seeing that she was unhappy with that. Her problem was communication - she didn't share her feelings about it and if she did things would have had the potential to change.
So, now I'm about 5 months into a divorce, working on myself, not dwelling on it, but have hope that we can reconnect again - even after we go though other relationships as I'm sure we will.
I'm looking for others stories that have gone through this and ended up together again.
Those links you send me were interesting but too far off from what my life is like. We didn't have and cheating, drugs, fights, name calling, walk aways, or anything like that. The divorce was a peaceful as it could have been. a lawyer was used only to do the formal paperwork, no fighting about money, no house to deal with so that made it easier, and no kids between us. We "smile" and have a little wave when we see each other but the chance of getting back together is far off, if at all. I know that chance is slim, but I know it happens and while I am continuing with my life, dating a bit, I am also looking to hear if it has happened to others and want to her their story...

Is she dating?

Have you read this?
A Summary of Dr. Harley's Basic Concepts

Yes, she is. No, I have read it.

Would you say you were a buyer in your M?

Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders

I meant I haven't read it...

Yes, I would say I was a buyer. Except, you need to know what changes need to be made, or even that changes are needed. That is what I didn't know, that us what I didn't hear. I am making those permanent life changes now, but it's too late to save the marriage, we are already divorced. That said, it may not be too late to try again. That's what I'm wondering if normal everyday people have done this and how did it turn out?

See here:

http://www.iamsecond.com/seconds/the-scruggs/

Google Jeff and Cheryl Scruggs....I believe they were apart 7 years b/c of her affair. They later remarried.

Wrote a book called "I Still Do"

OTHER people do lots of things. For a lot of different reasons.
This program, the information you will read here, and Dr. Harley's philosophy of marriage will give you an entirely new perspective on how to proceed with your life. Dating, meeting other women, and getting to know yourself through introspection and applying the principles here would be a better place to start than pondering if other people have reconciled. See, there's no substance that's relevant to that line of thinking. There is relevant substance to MB. I hope you'll take the time to avail yourself to the information here. You are in very good place to do so.

optimism

optimism, please expand. Are you saying that there is no good reason to consider reconciliation with a former spouse at any point in life? I hope we are all here to learn and expand upon our former selves yet that expansion needs goals. Goals to live life in a different way, to understand, truly understand at a meaningful level, what it is we want from life and what actions to take based on those wants. All these are valid, necessary actions to take. If I had to guess, I would assume your point is not to dwell. Not to allow any one potential goal, whatever it may be, to hinder an overall push forward. Would I be correct in that assumption? Or is the topic of reconciliation out of bounds and not a healthy consideration in life even if other true life changes have been made?

Please expand...

Dr Harley has personally counseled many couples that have divorced and later reconciled and remarried.
In fact he often encourages spouses to continue plan A for months or even years after a divorce.

43,
I will be happy to elaborate. Can't right now, but suffice it to say that JK above is absolutely right. I read something from Dr. H a couple years ago where he was encouraging a man to essentially not give up on reconciliation until the ex got married again. He also outlines a plan and set of behaviors that lead to romantic love. The more you know about his basic concepts the more you'll understand the philosophy of reconciliation with any past relationship, or even creating successful new relationship.
opt

Jedi, what is Plan A?

Optimism, that sounds cool. Please elaborate when you can. What's the best way to learn about the behaviors you mention? About the concepts and philosophy you mention?
4311

What bomb?
By "soulmates", do you mean that you were able to meet each others emotional needs, almost effortlessly. That I believe is probably due to your growing up in the same environment/culture.
just so you know, we need to hear some specifics on what it means: "working on some things" otherwise it sounds like code for doing nothing. IE. lots of people come here and say they are working on things and then a year later they are in the same place wth the same methods and understanding of MB principles.

Which is where I would start -- Basic Concepts. Theres a tab for it and you can familiarize yourself with Lovebusters, the Love Bank, and Emotional Needs. It will give you a perspecitve on what we talk about here and are trying to apply to our lives, relationships, and marriages.

Also, Highly recommended would be to listen to the radio show where Dr. H talks to couples and individuals -- a way to see how the principles apply to real life situations.

Opt

The bomb was the divorce.
By soul mates I mean that the love we had for each other was very deep and we connected on a deep level, we communicated by simply making eye contact, we shared the same energy. We were high school sweethearts, were apart for over 20 yrs after high school and yet she recontacted me via email, only having one word in the email, my name with a questions mark, I knew my life would be changing, and it did. I can go on...

Working on things - sure, you want specifics, no problem:
-I have epilepsy and because of it I didn't drive. this put a huge weight on her because she had to do all the driving, picking up my step-daughter from school, etc. I had been taking the same meds for 20 yrs, they were not working as good as they should have been but yet I didn't go to the doc to see if they had new meds...I have gone to the doc and have been taking new meds for 6 mnths and have not had a seizure since.
-The driving thing: since I have been seizure free I passed my learners permit test, have been practicing driving, and have my road test in 3 weeks (this is huge)
-I didn't take initiate to connect with other people, make new friends, reconnect with my family: I have joined hiking groups, biking groups, and a financial planning class. In the last 6 months I have made a great friend who is more like a brother to me now. I know a number of new people through my groups. I have reconnected with my mom and sister and my sister has said that she sees a big difference in me reaching out to them.
-I had a problem with my weight, I am 6ft tall and weighed 126 lbs...I have changed my diet, am eating 3000 calories a days and have gained 14 lbs in the last 6 mnths
-I am a senior software analyst but I never finished college. This is has always been a monkey on my back, just from a personal emotional level, so I contacted my college and requested that they allow my to finish up my degree through online courses. After a bit of a fight they have allowed me to re-apply, I was approved and have since completed 2 more courses
-I have joined a gym and have really added muscle onto my body, which also add good weight, and go to yoga 3x/week

How's that?