FOREWARNING: I have no intention to be distasteful in my post but sex is discussed w/ respect.

In His needs Her needs Dr. Harley touches on sexuality however I would be interested if he, anyone in his staff, or someone thriving using the principals in his book in their marriage has any practical educational sex books they might recommend?

I would not refer to myself as a Christian currently although I have a Christian background. I am not new to sex either and have read several (To some extent) on the subject.

I am working through His needs Her needs now to get my relationship built back up and beyond what it ever was to begin with in terms of romantic love and would also like to meet my wife's needs perhaps even greater in sex.

Based on the book title alone, "She comes first" (Which I never completed reading so if thats a suggestion I will finish reading it) I have always prioritized her having orgasms (And she does) but I'm interested if I can meet her needs to a greater degree.

There is a chapter in HNHN that Dr. H talks about a woman's orgasm. He suggests a book in there. I can't remember it off the top of my head.

Tell us what you think about the book.

He references several:

Wheat, Ed, MD, and Gaye Wheat: Intended for Pleasure
Pennet, Clifford, and Joyce Pennet: The Gift of Sex
Kaplan, Helen Springs,MD, PhD: The New Sex Therapy
Kline-Graber, Georgia, RN,and Benjamin Graber: Women's Orgasm: A Guide to Sexual Satisfaction

great recommendations, NG.

don't forget that your best resource is your wife! what pleases one woman many leave another cold. if you can read the books together, and discuss & practice, that will help build intimacy, leading to greater sexual satisfaction for both of you.

becoming RH with each other in regard to SF is so beneficial to the relationship, yet very many couples find it difficult, even after years of M. i commend you on your honesty & willingness to discuss this subject with your W.

There was another book on sex that he recently suggested but I forgot to note it. I sent them an email asking for the title.

One of the first things we did in counseling with Dr. Chalmers was to lay out our ENs. The part I never realized was so necessary was laying out the specifics of how you wanted your ENs met. Dr. J (as we called her) helped me to communicate to my wife how I wanted my #1 EN met (SF) and to ask specific questions to help my W meet that need.

IWLII = I Would love it if.
�IWLII you and I could be intimate X number of times per XXX.�
�IWLII we could schedule our times of intimacy when you have the most energy.� I chuckled when the Dr and I discussed this. Uhm er um � we have kids. Strike when opportunity strikes.
�IWLII you would tell me if there is anything I can do before, during or after our intimate times together that would enhance the experience for you.�

For me, unfortunately, my wife seems to struggle communicating these �tougher� subjects and thus I have yet to get a response for that last IWLII.

Drewsky,

Do you find yourself in a similar situation? I�m curious what brings you here asking for this material?

How open and honest are you and your W on this subject?

I was thinking the same thing. I believe he talked about "the Sexually Confident Wife" by Shannon Ethridge. This would be more for the DW, though...

I would suggest finishing "She Comes First." It's a short book anyway.

opt

Hmm .. good thread. Just thought I would mention that my wife and I are reading Womens Orgasm (not done .. but taking it slow as we approach the practical aspect of the book). Its actually quite informative. MY wife realized reading it that her PC muscle is actually VERY weak. She is actively working on it now after reading the part in that book that explained how each time you have a kid the PC mucsle gets weaker.. and sometimes even rips. Alot of women ignore this or dont even realize how much it really effects their sexual desire and ability to enjoy SF. . My wife is finding now that she has worked on her PC muscle a little bit she is regaining senstation back during SF .. where as before (after the kids arrived) she lost all sensation. I love my wife so much and she is learning to become a MUCH better lover for us. Special thanks to "Womens Orgasm" and the very insightful and informative info it provides (its very clinical in some aspects of it but my wife likes that).

MNG

I would suggest finishing "She Comes First." It's a short book anyway.

Modesty forbade me from suggesting NG'S ENCYCLOPEDIA OF FEMALE SEXUALITY. It's one photocopied sheet, mostly blank!

i hadn't finished sniggering at the first one before i guffawed at the second!