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I see living_well
I don't mind doing counseling on my own as long as it is productive. He is strong willed enough where he sticks to his ways. Is one counseling usually enough?
Would you mind mentioning my other love busters in my posts. Do you work in the counseling field?
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I see living_well
I don't mind doing counseling on my own as long as it is productive. He is strong willed enough where he sticks to his ways. Is one counseling usually enough?
Would you mind mentioning my other love busters in my posts. Do you work in the counseling field? Can you afford the Harleys? They talk to you alone anyway. How's that keylogger coming along?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Counseling with Harley's is a stretch. If It were something that would help immidiately I would think of it. And now this keylogger that's not working while support takes half a day to respond.
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Would you mind mentioning my other love busters in my posts. Do you work in the counseling field? I only picked up the two I brought to your attention. And none of us here are professionals, we are all just people who have walked in your shoes. Courage!
3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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Plan to stop love busting is worth it because the other person then feels:
1. Being cared for. Be a source of happiness.
2. Protect each other. Avoid being a source of unhappiness.
This avoids making further withdrawals from the bank.
Now I have to work on keeping our house so it looks like a home, him being radically honest and spending 15hours a week.
Oh and the withdrawal after meeting family may really be him protecting me or himself.
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So the other day while still in withdrawal mode he moved all my things from the guest room for the nieces visit. Of course I was very mad then that he is trying to control me as he chooses and at the same time have to figure out how I would not loose my temper.
I'm gonna have to memorize those reasons of Why I'm in this. One reason, Learning the assertiveness skill is needed to have anyway.
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So the other day while still in withdrawal mode he moved all my things from the guest room for the nieces visit. Of course I was very mad then that he is trying to control me as he chooses and at the same time have to figure out how I would not loose my temper.
I'm gonna have to memorize those reasons of Why I'm in this. One reason, Learning the assertiveness skill is needed to have anyway. Do you have the book Love Busters?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Not yet BH. I think my communication style is something he signed up for. And we all have habits before getting married. But we still sign up for settling down when that bank is full at some point.
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Not yet BH. I think my communication style is something he signed up for. And we all have habits before getting married. When you are married you create new habits that do not annoy your spouse. How is the keylogger going?
3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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Hope you are doing well LW. Researching on disabling the antivirus to install this logger.
LgLgreturns mentioned something earlier on 12/3/2012 about BP issues. What's that, not sure wt the term is in MB.
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Hope you are doing well LW. Researching on disabling the antivirus to install this logger. You do not need to disable it to install. It is very hard to disable an anti virus programme for obvious reasons. Install the logger in invisible mode and then run the av. If it spots the logger, tell it to ignore it and run the av again to check that all is well. LgLgreturns mentioned something earlier on 12/3/2012 about BP issues. What's that, not sure wt the term is in MB. BP is Borderline Personality Disorder, a very distressing condition characterised by violent moodswings and suicide attempts and caused by very severe trauma in early childhood. MB is about changing our habits. Of course a severely troubled person cannot do that consistently but 99% of us are able to change habits that our spouses find annoying or upsetting. These damage and ultimately destroy the love in a marriage and so it is essential to address them.
3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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Lw
I am working on it today. Thanks for your encouragement
Today i am thinking about what is causing his independent behavior/ independent decisions without involving me. Dishonesty can be one reason. What are ways to communicate that it would be great if he would include me in things he decides on.
For example, he steps out and he may be networking with ppl, do you think he has stopped telling me where he's going because his EN needs have not met for a while?
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On 12/19/2012 we told to get a keylogger onto the computer. This was so that we could help you find out what is causing his independent behaviour. Nobody can answer your question until you come back to us with what he is doing on the computer. The keylogger will not only give you all his passwords, it will give you screenshots of everything he does from now on.
Do not tell him what you have done or confront him with what you discover, bring your information back here. We will help you with the next steps to take.
3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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The keylogger keeps getting removed when the avast antivirus runs a scan. A blue screen shows and the when the computer starts the keylogger is gone.
I don't have this computer every day but have to get help on the logger. Maybe a new ticket to support.
Maybe he is watching some games on the computer.
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The keylogger keeps getting removed when the avast antivirus runs a scan. A blue screen shows and the when the computer starts the keylogger is gone.
I don't have this computer every day but have to get help on the logger. Maybe a new ticket to support.
Maybe he is watching some games on the computer. Are you disabling the antivirus before you install? Have you called or emailed the support team for your keylogger?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Yes I'm disabling it and then once installed and can see my key logs then enabling the avast antivirus. Yes emailed suppot, I'll create a new ticket as well I guess.
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Support asked me to uninstall avast and then instal the logger. I uninstalled the avast and now this old computer keeps hanging up when restarting.
I have been able to restart it once about 2 hours ago. The computer is 4 or more years old. I'll update if I make any progress.
BH, do u know of a free keylogger that doesn't show up in Malware bytes scans or by antivirus software?
In the meantime without the keylogger should I start a new thread if I have questions.
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Have you tried desktopshark? It's free. www.desktopshark.com
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Isnt desktopshark free only during the trial. After that time will it show a message that its expired? Looks like i'll have to add it to the exception list in the avast antivirus and risk he check it before i get some passwords.
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BH I've tried Desktop Shark in the meantime. After restarting the computer, I do Tab, Home, End but the console isnt opening. The folder DS is in the C drive but cant be opened.
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