Long story short my wife and I have been together for 10 years but only married for the past 1 and a half, my wife came home from work at 8:30 pm on the 11th of Feb 2013. She got upset because the dishes weren't done, I had already cleaned the rest of the house, she went upstairs, switched clothes and left, wouldn't answer any of my calls until 2ish in the morning, wouldnt tell me where she was only that she didn't want to be married anymore, and didn't love me anymore.

This was out of the blue, no issues up to this point, so it hit me by surprise. Came home the next day. Fast forward to Wednesday 20th of Feb 2013, I wanted to go shooting my guns to let off some steam, she comes home, see's my guns gone, and immediately tries calling me, my phone slipped out of my jacket pocket in my car, she freeks out, calls numerous friends of both of ours, and my family saying I was out going to commit suicide, as far from the truth as possible.

She gets pissed cuz I called my family first telling them it was a big mis understanding, she packed a bag about 3:30 pm, before I got home, and told my dad that she was heading to Texas to see her dad. I get home, my dad tells me of this, I tried calling, but no answer till 6:30 pm. She says she's almost to Kansas, well come to find out she was actually heading to Minnesota to see a guy frind of hers.

While she was up there, I rented a moving truck and moved ALL my stuff out, which was 95% of the stuff we had, I only did this to prove a point I was done messing around, not the point that I really wanted to live someplace else. Well she changed the lock on the door, thus me not being able to get back into MY OWN HOUSE.

Over this whole time, we have still talked, and hung out, and still see eachother once a day but usually only for about 15 minutes or so. I have told her numerous and numerous times that I was only trying to prove a point not that I really wanted to be out of my own house. So this Sunday she is going out of town to Texas for a week, she is supposely changing the lock back so I can check on the house etc, she went and filed for divorce today, but don't want it to be messy, just want's her stuff, and none of mine.

My question is while she's gone in Texas, should I move my stuff back in, granted it won't be all of it, just a good chunk, but I take the risk of her changing the lock back once all my stuff is back in the house... what's your thought's, should I move my stuff back in being's it's my house also, or just let her do her thing and be in it alone?

If you are married then you have a right to be in the house.
Just because she changes the locks doesn't mean that you don't have a legal right to be in there.
She's probably going to see her affair partner instead of her dad.
Since she is having at least one affair you need to expose the affair.
Most affairs die after exposure.

Have you read the Basic Concepts on this forum?

Have you read Surviving an Affair by Dr Willard Harley?

Welcome to MB.

Who is this OM? Is he married?

Have you exposed her affair? Do you have children?

Absolutely yes move back in your house.

Have you read the threads in here?
Start Here First-Welcome Aboard

Well, it does seem that both of you both acting hotheaded occasionally, which results in such fallouts and drives across the state. Having been in a relationship with a rather impulsive person, I can see how the discussions can grow overheated. I do however not agree that moving in while she is away for a week is a wise decision. As you admit talking a bit and hanging out, why not to make sure that your communication improved before dragging all that stuff back and forth? Even if that is the case of a divorce (of which I am sorry to hear, which is not easy, but you will have to go on), you should still be allowed to allocate to a space that belongs to you. Doing so with her present can help you avoid the unwanted mess in the future.

Generally speaking, you should be in the house for all kinds of legal, strategic and relationship reasons.

I would say move back and don't give her a chance to say no. What if she did say no?

You also need to snoop out what is actually going on and expose when the everything is ready, the sooner the better.

Waiting for a spouse that is in an affair to act reasonably, rediscover their morals, whatever you want to call it, is a losing proposition. They are under the influence of something that has already caused them to stray from that.

With an active affair, there can be no recovery. The affair must be destroyed if possible, it will not die on its own with some stress on it, the more stress, the quicker it arrives, the better.

If recovery becomes possible (The affair is over) then proximity is essential.

He should move back into his home. The marriage obviously can't be repaired if he is not living there.

I would strongly advise the poster to STOP FIGHTING. Put away your guns and stay out of fights!

Well here's a part I guess I forgot to mention is she is texting this guy at least 2 to 3 hours a day/night. She say's they are only friends and that he only listens and doesn't make her feel uncomfortable, but honestly sending him a text at 4:50 am the minute she gets up EVERYDAY and back and forth all day throughtout work, then when she gets off, it constantly texting back and forth. She will lie to me and say she is going right to bed because she didn't get a nap and is extremely tired, yet talks to him for an hour or so after she say's she's going to bed..Someone has mentioned there are way's to tap a cell phone, she has an I-Phone 4 so wondering what my options are?

Check this out.
iPhone 4 Keyloggers

I would get moved back in ASAP!

Move back in. You are compromising your right to your property. Begin Plan A now. Follow the tips in the snooping thread to get your evidence together; but do not under any circumstances let your wife know, then follow the exposure thread to do a nuclear exposure. Kill the thing. If you love your wife you owe it to her to do everything possible to save your marriage. This is what you promised her, your friends and family, and God the day you took your vows.

If you read "Buyers, Renters, and Freeloaders," you'll see that neither you nor your wife are "buyers." You do not personally own 95% of the marital property. You are married, not single, so your property is shared. If you were "buyers" rather than "renters," you and your wife wouldn't be bickering about property as if you were still unmarried. I suspect your "renters" approach is quite entrenched because you lived together for more than 8 years prior to marriage.

Well she said last night she didn't know if she should change the locks back to where I had access to the house in fear of me moving a couple more items out of the house while she was in Texas as well as me moving my stuff back into the house. She made me promise that if she changed the locks back that I wouldn't do neither one of the two. Well I want to move back in due to it being my house as well, but don't want her throwing it in my face saying you lied to me, and calling the cops to want me removed from the property, or when I leave for work the next day her changing the locks on me with all my items now back in the house.

I would move right back into your home. The only thing worse than making a bad promise is KEEPING a bad promise. You have no reason whatsoever to leave your home and I assure you it is not in your best interest. All you do is harm your own legal interests and run the risk of angering a judge for abandonment. Most judges do not look kindly on men who abandon their families.

So, I would get right back in your home. Call your wife and tell her you made a bad promise and are now making it right. Tell her you have a legal right to be in your home and if she tries to block you from entering your home, the police will be called and she will be in legal trouble!

on the other hand, even if she already filed for divorce on Thurdsay and the papers are written up? I never signed anything, nor seen my attorney yet till Monday. So your suggestion is to move back in, should I move my son back in also, or let him still stay at my parents for right now?

Absolutely, you should move back in! And if she wants you out, she can get a court order. Is this the son of both of you?

Get back into your house! She made you promise you wouldn't live in your own house??? NONSENSE. If she has a problem with you moving back into your own house, tell her that you agreed to something that makes no sense, and you have now realized that folly. Don't let her bully you - that's a typical tactic of WWs.

No its my son, her step son, somebody suggested changing the locks myself while she is gone, meet her at the door when she gets back and say here is the new key to the house, this is my house, i never wanted to move out only wanted to prove a point. ....so thats the plan, move me, and my son back in and make her get a court order to have me removed, ..what if she puts a no contact order on me????

WMW, my suggestion would be to go home and leave your son with his grandparents until the situation calms down. Don't change the locks and don't let her put you out.

I just went through divorce.
In my experience judges don't issue No Contact orders without just cause.
You have as much right to marital property as she does.
In fact, in Ohio the courts have a standard Mutual Restraining Order they issue which prohibits either spouse from changing the locks.

If you have any problems call the police and your lawyer.

But your focus should be to kill her affair and restore your marriage.
You need to be around her as much as possible because that makes it more difficult to have an affair.
Move in, expose the affair, and plan A.