Any idea which website? Like photobucket or the like?

I will be telling the children...on EXPOSE day. As soon as I have everything in order and ready to go I will set a date.

Havent tried yet, should I try now? I know it's a landline...and they have moved since the day of the record I pulled it from, so it may not work.

There is a post by rainysweet on my exposure thread that gives step by step instructions. It makes for a GREAT exposure.

What is your exposure date?

not sure yet, gonna get everything in place first...still getting excellent ideas from you

It will be very soon though.

I did the fb expose of the ow this am. Her mother In law said she would call OBS. I told her to let me know when after she has. I will sit down with dhs family this weekend.

I will keep ya updated.

Mom,

What is OBS? I assume it is some sort of authorities.

Tell everyone else as quickly as possible. Once waywards know they are being outed, they spin a story making you look like a crazy person. I would not be surprised if your H and the OW are already communicating about how to make their contact seem innocent and you are paranoid.

Did you talk to OWH in person or did you settle on sending him a restricted delivery letter? If not, contact him TODAY.

AM

I think by "OBS" she means other betrayed spouse? And she has contacted the OWH's mother.

mom, good job!! Now, don't stop there. Hit all your other exposures today or at the LATEST tomorrow. Ideally, it should all be done within 24 hours.

Keep us posted, my friend.

OBS = other betrayed spouse.

Oh. I think I have this straight. The mother-in-law of the other woman said she would contact her son.

If I were Mom, I would still look to establish some sort of contact directly with other woman's husband, MIL son. He is in a position to monitor his wife's computer and phone activity.

AM

way to go mom.

will you be exposing to your daughters today also?

praying for you....

DH's mom is out of town until Sunday, Sunday she will have the WHOLE family over for Easter dinner. I hate to ruin the atmosphere, but it is PERFECT opportunity to confront all of them together.

As for the girls, I have told them. They knew something was going on, and are quite upset, but I told them I'm willing to work on the marriage if dad is.

BTW, Mom, good job in exposure and fighting for your family.

AM

So alot has happened this weekend after EXPOSE day:

This message from OBS mom:




2:47pm


I just heard from OBS. He knows about DH. He is trying to take a nonconfrontive approach. She says that she's not moving to Florida and that they can co-parent their small child. She also agreed not to do anything until he is out of school in 2 years. She doesn't appear to have any plans to move to Florida. Is he planning to move to Washington? He is just hoping that the distance between them will cause their relationship To fizzle. He tried confronting her and that is when she demanded a divorce. She is being reasonable right now so he wants to keep the distance between them at a minimum. I will pray for your family. OBS didn't want your information but if that changes he knows I will give it to him.

Then Later:
It sounds like she has decided to stop the relationship according to OBS.

God bless you. You'll have to forgive him now in order to make uour marriage work.

And this was from OWW brother:

My name is XXX, OWW's older brother. Let me start off by apologizing that this has happened. I don't condone it and troubles me deeply that my own sister would do this. I know exactly how you feel as I was in the exact same position two years ago and found out exactly as you did. I even took the same measures by contacting his wife and confronting him in person.
I know that you don't know me, however you have my personal guarantee that this is over with. I have yet to talk to her. When I do I will tell her that if I were to find out from you that it doesn't end she will not only lose her family, she will lose a brother. It deeply saddens me and words cannot express enough the disappointment and anger that I'm feeling. I have just one request, please remove the website. I have to think about my oldest daughter who has Facebook and it bothers me to think she may come across this because of her selfishness. My sisters and your husbands actions are intolerable and have ramifications that go far beyond your family and hers. It has affected all of us and I'm sure that you wouldn't want you children seeing the crap my sister sent. I don't want my daughters to see it. So I beg of you to remove it. I am having to do my own damage control to protect my kids. I understand your anger and those that needed to know now know and it is being dealt with the upmost importance. Thank you for taking the time to bring this to my attention. If you ever need to contact me, I can be reached at XXX. Take care of yourself and your family.

Sincerely,
XXX


Then yesterday:

This is over with. She has admitted to being extremely selfish and did not think about the consequences of her actions. Both my mother and I have laid into her. We have told her that there isn't to be any further communication. Everything from the fake Facebook page to the Skype account gets deleted. I told her I will personally mark her with a scarlet letter as you did if I find out from you that she has so much sent a smiley face on a post it note. Same goes with WW too. I hope you have a happy Easter.

She contacted DH on Friday telling him he HAD to do something as I was uncontrollable, contacting her family and friends.

I will see that DH deletes all his fake accounts...

Now what??? How do I start rebuilding?

What all boundaries do I put in place. I know about the NC for life, and total transparency...what else? What can I do to start rebuilding trust?

You did a great job with your exposure. And you are very lucky in that OW's family is supporting you against her affair with your H.

What has been the reaction of your H? Is he willing to work with you on recovering your marriage?

The first thing he would have to agree with is writing a letter of No Contact. He would write it, you would approve it and mail it.

Then he would, as you mention, close off all means of communication with OW. He must make it impossible for her to communicate with him.

He will need to agree to:

Transparency and integrated lifestyle: share all passwords, exchange phones immediately at any time you ask, account for all time and money spent; no nights apart; answer all questions you have about the A

Extraordinary Precautions that you create and are non-negotiable. They are instituted to keep this from ever happening again. To repeat: the EPs are NOT negotiable. These are YOUR boundaries to protect you from being in an unsafe marriage. To start with: no OS friendships EVER

Your H must provide Just Compensation: Engage fully with you in a program of recovery. MB has a great plan that recover your marriage, one hundred percent guaranteed, if BOTH spouses follow it. The recovered marriage must be a lot better than the pre-A marriage. Using MB, following all the steps, will result in a passionate, romantic, SAFE marriage.

He must agree to ALL of the above steps.

Keep in mind that if you follow all of the steps, even with a spouse who is enthusiastic about recovery, recovery is a long process, taking about 2 - 5 years. If he proceeds willingly and you both cooperate, you will start to feel better in a few months.

Mom,

Contact is as recent as Friday.

Longway is absoutely correct. Has your husband agreed to no contact with OW? Will he write a no contact letter that you approve and mail? If not, you will know that the affair has not ended and that your H's intent is to keep the A going.

Next, will he be transparent? Will he give you all passwords, access to computers and phones? He will need to change all the conditions that made his affair with this woman possible.

I see no need for you to take the facebook information down at the request of the brother. You have told your children the truth. It seems likely that he lied to his children about the occurrance in his own marriage.

AM

How was OW able to contact him again and how did you find out about it?

You need to shut down all the avenues of communication and expose any continued contact.

Do not underestimate the lengths OW will go to keep her drug.