Your right, what they do just doesn�t matter anymore. Doesn�t make me feel any better about it all, and it still turns my stomach. But there is nothing more I can do, to get either of them, or anyone in their lives, to see that their relationship in the past and now, is the root cause of this divorce. I tried my best to expose and kill their affair, in a hopeful attempt to get my wife to work with me on fixing this marriage. It really sucks to know that they can move forward and be "happy" with one another, regardless of who they hurt in the process. Even our kids...

If she and I had only used 10% of the effort that it took to go through this divorce process, and applied those efforts in an attempt to understand each other and work on our issues, then there could of been a different outcome to this mess. For now I just have to accept the fact that I have to "share" my kids and pray that their lives are not affected by the relationship/s she brings into their lives. I am sickened to the core by that probability or better said certainty.

I am ready to shed this guilt that somehow I am responsible for driving her back to him. That I am somehow ultimately responsible for how this marriage is going to end. I tried my best, so I cannot/will not do anymore to try and save this marriage, or get her or anyone else in her circle to see that their affair is sinful.

IT IS TIME to move back 20 yards and PUNT THIS BALL!!! I will do my best to leave it completely in Gods hands. I am going to put my future efforts and prayers in asking God to help me through the process of forgiving them both. Holding this bitterness and resentment towards them is doing nothing but hurting my own spiritual and physical self. It needs to be let go of. I am physically... emotionally... and mentally exhausted.

Sounds like your ready for Plan B. Also, you do not know what is going on in affair land so stop trying to understand it. Making the irrational rational will do nothing to change your situation. They maybe hunkydory in public but peel back the onion and your exposure is eating away at the core of their sinful relationship. Let the church know about this wolf in the flock as well. A letter to all the elders and pastor would suffice. My WW and POSOM go to church too (laughs). Amazing the audacity of some people right? Anyways you done good and if you feel like your LB$ is running low go into Plan B.

I will assume LB$ is my love bank� ? If I am correct, then it�s not running low, it�s in the red.

Not sure what plan B entails, guess I will need to read and re-read about it.

I did propose the idea of letting their church know about it, to my pastor. It was a touchy subject and ultimately asked to hold off on the idea of that for now. Again as I said before, it is in Gods hands. I will/can do no more.

P.s. The OM�s "injunction of harassment" that he filled against me was quashed by the court. At his own request� Guess the thought of him perjuring himself in court room became all too real when it was suggested that I plan to fight this injunction in court. But warning to all, be very careful of how/if you chose to expose. You had better have proof and stick with the facts. If I had gone any other direction than that, it would of been a different story.

No, no. You must expose this to the church -- your pastor probably thinks it would reflect on HIM. And hold off? For how long? For the OM to keep going?

Of course it was quashed. He had more to lose than you. It was an empty threat that we have seen played out hundreds of times. We have never had a WS pursue it all the way to court because they don't want their affair dragged through court. Most BSs would LOVE it of they would!

Waywards are bullies, blowhards and cowards who can't afford to have their junk aired in court. As we say in Texas, ALL TALK AND NO ACTION!!

I just brought it up to the pastor last night, not the affair that was obviously months ago, but doing the exposure in the church they attend together. We have a formal meeting on the subject next week. Like I keep saying guys/gals, not sure how many of you believe in the Holy Spirit, but I know that I have been directed �to do no more�. So quite simply I will do �no more�.

Will still love to have your support and hear personal stories about what WW�s go through after exposure? Or how their relationship progresses? Do they just carry it on openly and begin to throw it in my face? Do they still sneak around even though everyone knows about it? Kinda seems like all I have done is give them one more thing to bond with together; hating me, lol!

Bad enough that the OM has posted a picture of him and my wife, on Easter, in front of their church� yea they didn�t close up shop, just blocked me from seeing them I guess. What will be next? I�ll probably be coaching my kids baseball teams, look up, and see them together in the stands� better lock me outa the dugout or at least hide the bats� the bat thing was my attempt at humor, pretty poor I know, but certainly not my demeanor�

Wow .. sounds like the church my mother in law used to attend. They "let" her have an affair my wayward mother in law even stood up in front of her church and told them all (after i exposed the affair on mother in laws facebook wall) that she was NOT having an affair. Funny though .. she is now married to the guy and they moved to a new church and new town where no one knows them because they believe god brought them together. Sad.. like god says "go have an affair with this man because HE is actually the guy for you" yeah right ..

I bet you once your wife and OM have nothing left to appease each other with they will have nothing left but guilt and shame when they realize their relationship was based purely on fantasy. They wont see it now because they are having too much fun justifiying to each other of their actions.

Be patient .. sometimes gods anwsers to prayer is "not right now".

MNG

"next week. Like I keep saying guys/gals, not sure how many of you believe in the Holy Spirit, but I know that I have been directed �to do no more�. So quite simply I will do �no more�. "

That is not the Holy Spirit that is telling you to violate scripture by keeping the affair a secret. That "spirit" is the spirit of darkness. The Bible tells us to expose evil and it is very clear that sin be exposed to the church if the sinner will not stop.

Your pastor is not following scripture, but that doesn't mean you have to ignore it too. We are told to use the Bible as our source and to verify what we believe to be the HS with the Word of God. If it doesn't line up you know the message is not from God.

Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. 21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.
John 3:20-21.

Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. Ephesians 5:11

Exactly ML ... thats why I have that scripture in my signature!

...not sure how many of you believe in the Holy Spirit, but I know that I have been directed �to do no more�...

Shame on you!

How about accessing the SOURCE instead of creating private "messages" that cater to the fears and doubts that plague everyone facing a new challenge.

How many scriptural verses exhorting fearlessness and resolution in fighting evil will it take to have you listen to The Word instead of your own counsel? We'll activate as many correspondents as it takes to supply the necessary citations!

As for me, it is sufficient to focus on the Spiritual Act of Mercy #1 - ADMONISH THE SINNER - to find the strength to unsheath and polish my Sword of Admonishment!

�If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.16�But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED.17�If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.18�Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven.
Matthew 18:15-18