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#2740562 07/01/13 08:22 PM
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didi768 Offline OP
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I, like other women on here married but never loved my mate. I too treat him bad and always feel bad afterwards. I treat everyone else just fine but he rubs me the wrong way just by looking at me. I'd like to set him free but we do have two teens. He tells me to go ahead and file but I have no job or money. This tears me apart every day and he does not deserve to be so beat up every day by someone he loves. Yes, he does love me very much. I can't even stand when he touches me or even looks at me. I dread him coming home at night so bad I want to throw up sometimes.

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Have you been in love with anyone else? Attracted to anyone else?


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Here is some material that will help you:

Romantic Love: Is it a Realistic Goal for Marriage Therapy? http://www.marriagebuilders.com/mb2.cfm?recno=9&sublink=61
How Dr. Harley Learned to Save Marriages: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/mb2.cfm?recno=3&sublink=20
Dr. Harley's free videos:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi1000_video.html
Dr. Harley's Basic Concepts:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3000_intro.html
Dr. Harley's Q&A columns:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/mb2.cfm?recno=4&sublink=33


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Hi didi,

Why did you marry him if you weren't in love? Are you interested in someone else? Do you want to change this and have a romantic marriage with your H?

Sounds like your H is not meeting your emotional needs. This CAN all change, you CAN fall in love with him and have a very happy marriage by using this program!


Any affairs either side? Does your H know you have never loved him? Is he willing to work with you and use the MB program?

You can't just stay in the marriage because of the financial support he provides you, that is not fair to him. If you want to change this you have come to the right place! Are you ready?

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Didi,

Welcome to MB. I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. Being in a loveless, non-romantic marriage must be horrible.

Please read all the material you can on this site. Dr. Harley's concepts can make a huge difference for you.

Also ask your H to join you here before you give up on him. You and him can be romantically in love. You just have to do the work. Feelings follow actions.


Me: 57 Her: 54
M: 31 years
Kids(DS23, DD20, DS18)
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Originally Posted by didi768
I, like other women on here married but never loved my mate. I too treat him bad and always feel bad afterwards. I treat everyone else just fine but he rubs me the wrong way just by looking at me. I'd like to set him free but we do have two teens. He tells me to go ahead and file but I have no job or money. This tears me apart every day and he does not deserve to be so beat up every day by someone he loves. Yes, he does love me very much. I can't even stand when he touches me or even looks at me. I dread him coming home at night so bad I want to throw up sometimes.


Can you tell us some of the things your husband does that irritate you?

How often do you two go out, just the two of you, on dates?


If you think he deserves to not be beat up, DON'T BEAT HIM UP. You are in control of how you treat people.


"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR

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