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I just found out my husband is having an affair. I would confront him but I am currently. In California and our home is in Naples FL. I am going home in 3 weeks not sure how to address the affair and should I wait till I get there. He is very distant and does not call very often mostly text. We are in out late 40's. We have been married for 20+ years.
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I am so sorry, Lizet. Welcome to MArriage Builders.
Do you have evidence of the affair? What do you know about the OW?
And how often do you travel apart from each other? What is the reason you are in California and he is in Florida?
Do you have children? Have either of you ever had an affair before?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I have had to travel for work for a the last six months. I no longer need to travel for work. Yes I do have evidence and I know they work together and have met her before. No children and no affair for either of us.
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My suggestion would be to expose the affair and then confront him. But you will need to be living at home when you do it. Please go read the Exposure 101 thread so you understand WHY we give this valuable advice. It will give you instructions on how to execute a strategic plan to save your marriage. Can you go home sooner?
In the meantime, please go read the necessary threads in the "Start Here" thread in this forum. It is real important to understand the reasons behind the strategy.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Is she married? Does she have a facebook page?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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She was and no she does not have facebook.
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Thank you for your advice... I have started reading exposure and no I can not go home sooner. I may need to support myself if things go towards divorce. So I can not burn any bridges.
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She was and no she does not have facebook. How long ago was she divorced? Wht do you know about it? And can you ask someone else to see if they can see a facebook page for her? Sometimes cheaters will block their victims.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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She has been divorced under a year. I know she does not have FB. I do have her mothers e-mail and was thinking of sending her an email exposing the affair.
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She has been divorced under a year. I know she does not have FB. I do have her mothers e-mail and was thinking of sending her an email exposing the affair. Do you think the divorce was due to this affair? Do you know how to contact her husband? And that is a good idea to expose to her mother. But I would not do it until you are ready to launch the exposure nuke all on the same day. Do you know of any other family members? Can you locate the mother on facebook to see if you can see other relatives?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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she has been divorced for less than a year. I know she does not have FB. I do have her mothers e-mail I was thinking of exposing the affair to her mother.
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that is a great idea for the mother and on FB. I only know her husbands first name she did not take his name. I will work on this. Mean while do I continue like nothing is wrong.
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My husband is having an affair I am away from home now. So I have not confronted him yet. He is very distant and always very short on the phone and text. Is this normal behavior. How do I confront him when I get home.
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My husband is having an affair I am away from home now. So I have not confronted him yet. He is very distant and always very short on the phone and text. Is this normal behavior. How do I confront him when I get home. Welcome to MB and sorry for your pain. What evidence do you have? Who is OW? How did they meet? Have you read these? Start Here First-Welcome Aboard
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Yes I am positive, They met at work. Yes I have started reading it. I am not sure what I am walking into when I go home
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Yes I am positive, They met at work. Yes I have started reading it. I am not sure what I am walking into when I go home When do you go home? Is she married?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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My husband is having an affair I am away from home now. So I have not confronted him yet. He is very distant and always very short on the phone and text. Is this normal behavior. How do I confront him when I get home. lizet, please stick to one thread. You need to get the evidence and then we will help you expose the affair.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I go home in 2 weeks. No recently divorced.
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sorry I was not sure how to continue the discussion.
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I have an video of them together that a PI was able to get for me.
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