Did you look through this Polygraph Testing?

There are example questions that posters have used.

X2.


RNR, can you tell us what's going on now?

RNR, in my last post I gave you the bases to support my recommendations here, which are also based on historical MB cases, not lollipops-and butterflies outlooks. Are you still game?

In the recent past there have been four documented cases in which WWs, acting in manners strikingly similar to yours, have managed, on the flimsiest of pretenses, to get their BHs hit with restraining orders, or arrested, or both. To review:

- I would suppose I am the hardest case among them, because I actually did break the force-fit joint in my WW's glasses on d-night. It was accidental, but that was of no account. Pay attention, dude: Whichever genius here suggested smashing her i-phone is setting you up for the same treatment. Bad, bad advice!
- SMM was TRO'd for driving/braking IN A THREATENING MANNER(!) into a parking area where WW was snuggling with POSOM.
- Gack was arrested on his WW's testimony, with POSOM as the corroborating witness, that he threatened her in their house. (Uhhh, why was POSOM there? LEPs are NOT bright enough to ask those kinds of questions, RNR.)
- CP was arrested when HE called the LEPs to report his WW's bizarre behavior. (Like I said: not too bright!)

IMHO #1: You are targeted by WW to be the next member of our sad little club.

IMHO #2: You need Plan B on that basis, and to implement that Plan you need her out of the house.

Again, talk to Dr. Harley first before contemplating Plan B. Dr. Harley doesn't typically advise men to go to Plan B this early, especially one who has never done a good Plan A. Get his go-ahead first. Ever hear back from him?

NG: Could you please cast your comments in the context of what Dr. Harley said to this couple on the radio show? It is strikingly inconsistent as it stands, which means to me that it is not really MB based, in spite of your efforts at debating.

Everything is and has been taken into consideration throughout this entire ordeal. I do think that my wife loves me as I love her and I think is does want to be with me. However, there will be no plan B for me. If she wants to be with me she will do what has to be done and I will do my part also. I am dedicated to the program and I am still waiting for her to show me that she is as well.

So what Plan are you in? Have you emailed Dr. Harley back?

A Good clip for you and your WW.
Radio Clip

If RNR2013 isn't ready for Plan B, then it is not time.

However, if his wife is not abiding by the EP's then that is a serious problem that needs to be addressed without delay.

If it were me I would ask her to leave the house if she cannot abide by the agreed upon EP's, because that is the starting point,and if she cannot abide by them then there will be a lot of fights and interminable misery.

This won't work if he's not safe.

I have a question

My wife is very upset with me tonight so I am just leaving her be.
Today she received another text message from a number with a British Columbia area code. I said that two messages in two weeks from two different numbers with an area code from a different province but the same province where the OM was last known to be is a little to much of a coincidence for me and I want to change the number. My wife thinks that I am being foolish and paranoid vein suspicious of this and her. She says that I'm assuming things and wants me to stop being suspicious and looking for things.

Do you think she is right? It's only been a couple months and I am still very suspicious. My trust is getting better but it's not there yet and won't be for some time yet.

Trust is built through trustworthy action. It's not a freebie.

I'd trust a good fence before I trusted a good neighbor.


Make sense?

How would your wife behave if your positions were reversed? (This question helps me quite a bit as my WS would never back down if he was suspicious.)

Paranoid? She has given you good reason to be paranoid. But, now you are only reacting to her inappropriate behavior and the red flags she is raising.

Should I put timelines on things?

You maybe are paranoid.

Though your WW was cheating.

So that justifies your actions.

New number and keep monitoring that NC does not get broken.

She did tell me right away when the text messages came through both times. I called the numbers and a guy answered each of them. I asked who they were looking for and they both said they had the wrong number. My wife made it quite clear that if she was going to remain in contact she wouldn't use a phone that I had compleat access too, including being able to check with my service provider to see what numbers have texted and called. Still, I don't think it gives her the right to be angry with me for being suspicious.

Also, at this point are me and my wife considered to be in recovery or are we still in the midst of what can be considered a ongoing affair?


Like I said earlier there will be no plan B for me. I won't do it again, either it works now or it's over. I've accepted my share of the responsibility but it was her choice. So if he wants this marriage then I'm here now but won't be if she won't do her part in the here and now. Life's to short to waste chasing someone who doesn't want you. So I guess I wait and see where she wants to go with this?

We do not know if the affair is ongoing, but it is clear that she remains foggy. As for you, even if all suspect behavior ended at this moment and she started following MB to the letter, you would remain hyper vigilant for *years*. I still am after over two years. Vigilance is an essential part of an affair-proof marriage.

RNR-

Uh. Not good. Not good at all. Her response to you is a disrespectful judgment. Have you both read LB's yet??


She said you are Being Foolish and Paranoid? Those words actually came out of her mouth?


Dr. Harley's advice to you as a couple has been pretty specific. One of his goals is to create Empathy. Neither of you are in any position to tell the other person what they should and should not feel.

My man...did you listen to MB radio program yesterday or this morning? Please do so. They have a woman caller who is trying to rebuild trust. Dr. Harley ENCOURAGES snooping to make YOU feel safe.

People with nothing to hide don't hide.

Those calls she received are MORE than suspicious. You have to recon those numbers. Get to the bottom of it.

Why haven't you both embraced MB? Please explain this to me.

Mrs. Cen (IMO) has not been serious about R. This is proof positive. This is NOT what a spouse serious about repairing a M acts.

How can you go another day like this?

Trust is EARNED. Trust is not something that is just assumed! She has lied to you countless times. Right? Her word is worth nothing. Nothing. Zero.

She has proven to you that she is willing to make terrible decisions at your expense. What has she done to prove to you she has really changed?

This is going to take years. Yes, years to earn back. This is IF she were to be on perfect behavior.

You should NOT trust her!!!! Not one bit. Nada. Zero. Snoop your butt off each and every day.

I have been in your shoes friend. The path you are taking is not going to work out for you.

Set some boundaries and ENFORCE them. Use MB.

ETA: By the way..to state the obvious.

Yes, your suspicions are more than justified. You have every reason in the world to be suspicious. And will be for the rest of your M.

That is the position SHE put both of you in when she decided to lie, deceive and drop her panties for another man.

Don't confront her - snoop and verify.

You think???? Really? NO kidding...huh.

SO in her eyes, what course of events in life would justify someone being suspicious of anther human being?


In other news today the earth will continue to orbit the sun.


When are you going to man up? When are you going to set boundaries and hold her accountable? Until then, MB will not work for you.


I for one do not like being disrespected. Do you?