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Joined: Sep 2012
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Your doing well. I feel for your SD though her relationship with her mother is damage and will never be the same. When your WW realizes what her affair cost her it will implode. Keep up the self improvements.

Darkguy #2761724 10/22/13 06:48 AM
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Thanks td and I hope you are doing good on your side.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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There is a song, a rap song actually ( don't know your taste in music) by Talib Kweli called It only gets better. That's my motto, I make a change in my lifestyle cleaning up my side of the street so to speak I think of other ways I can improve upon that specific trait. For example, I hate folding laundry but it was one of her complaints so in order to make it easier and enjoyable for myself I teach DS how to and we make it into a game. Hope your improving yourself as well.

Darkguy #2761793 10/22/13 12:05 PM
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I quit smoking she hated that. I do the ecig now going to cut nicotine out. Lifting weights to kill depression.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,650
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How are doing on the father front? Remember your WW top needs and improve in that area.

Darkguy #2761806 10/22/13 12:46 PM
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Doing good there. Ds is doing great and dsd loves me as a father I take her out to dinner when I can. Its just sad that ww thinks I'm trying to turn her against ww.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
Joined: Sep 2012
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Its sad and shows your having a impact! Keep it up, kudos to the weightlifting to combat your depression. Just keep your boundaries high when your in the gym, a lot of affairs start in the gym. I run and do crossfit to beat my depression, I refuse to take mind altering substances lol

Darkguy #2761829 10/22/13 02:25 PM
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My borders are protected when it comes to the opposite sex. I turned down a lot of women. I told my dsd why I don't date while being in my position its not fair to ww and what kind of example would that make if I did. I truly believe you shouldn't have to step on people to find true happiness its better to share it.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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So I know I have to keep this up. But sometimes it seems that I am her problem when I'm just trying to be posotive.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Your letting the fogbabble get to you. Stay strong and don't let her actions or comments deter your plans. Remember you only can control yourself.

Darkguy #2762045 10/23/13 10:09 AM
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Ok thank you for your reassurance. I just hate how you keep hearing the same thing over and over. It feels like you start to believe its true and you are pulled into the bs fog.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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Same thing over and over.

Stick to the plan, stick to the plan, stick to the plan.

You'll make it.


BH Me 34
WW 29
DS 7, DD 5
Multiple EAs 2006-2011
PA 1 OM1 2/2012; D-Day1 3/14/2012; NC 4/1/2012; broke NC 05/2012
PA 2 ONS OW1 7/11/12
PA 3 OM2 1/06/2013; D-Day2 1/14/2013
Divorcing 1/22 Plan A 1/23
Worthless attempt at Trickle Exposure
Multiple PAs OW2,3,&4 since 1/27/2013
WW moved out 3/5/2013
Temp Custody of DS and DD 3/21/13
WW moved back D-Day 3 9/1/13
NC/FR 9/3/13
WW moved out 9/17/13
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I know it sometimes feel like your on a hamster wheel because you don't have and positive reactions from WW just negative reinforcement. Rest assured you are having a impact. For example, I spoke with my WW the other day about something unimportant in just did it to have contact. She went from that seemingly unimportant subject to how she hated her job and a specific worker there. At first glance this seems to be non-crucial but look at it from this perspective.

She spoke to me about it because of my Plan A. Do you think she will tell POSOM she talked to me and if she did will she tell him about the whole conversation? She came to me with this venting and not POSOM, you know why? Because the honeymoon phase is over they at shacking up and now it's not "fun" anymore and they don't talk like they used to. The fantasy is crumbling!

It's not a hamster wheel its a ultra-marathon! Keep your pace and when you do get some morsels or scraps of positive emotional energy do a little sprint. I sent her a email saying how enjoyed the conversation and that I'm sorry that co-worker of hers is a real "female dog". Once you come out of the sprint go back to the marathon and keep your pace. (^^)b

Darkguy #2762282 10/24/13 11:17 AM
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Thank you for the motivation that I needed.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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How are things?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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I am alive and doing well. Dsd called me on a private number so i think ww was listening in guess she misses hearing my voice. But me and dsd talked about the events in her life. I miss my family a lot but I keep stepping up and staying positive.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
Joined: Nov 2010
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Originally Posted by Chitenator
I am alive and doing well. Dsd called me on a private number so i think ww was listening in guess she misses hearing my voice. But me and dsd talked about the events in her life. I miss my family a lot but I keep stepping up and staying positive.
Glad to hear it.

Any plans soon to see DSD?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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After dsd fighting with ww I don't know. Ww blames me for everything in her life going to crap even her daughters actions are my fault. Only time will tell.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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Update for me. Looked up a friend from high school and got him to go out to the club. Saw ww there and she flipped me the bird and hid downstairs. I smiled and waved. I'm sorry but that put a big smile on my face. A few weeks ago dsd called me crying saying she was sorry for being a teen basicly and she mentioned that ww and I like to call him puke wagon fighting like screaming at each other. So my guess is she is trying to pull me in her misery with the bird flipping.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 249
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Joined: Mar 2013
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Update. I was just served divorce papers today and I looked through them it seems like she wants 3800 and half of a 100000 life insurance policy she must be hurting for money she didn't have a attorney on the paper work. I did talk yo dsd she seems to be doing fine. She also told me that ww spent 500 in clothes and posom made her return them.


Married for 3 years
And going through a seperation.
me bh 33
her ww 34
2 kids
her dd 14
my ds 8
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