Yeah you could be right, but he has no job, no car, and no money. He couldn't even get on there because it required payment, yes I checked, lol.
In reality if he is, I can't control it. I will just continue to deny him sex. He is asking everyday.
We have done it twice since DDay, with condoms, and I'm clean according to STD tests.
I am snooping and verifying. I thought that is what Plan A is?

TRY to get some sleep and eat the best you can. I know how hard this is! You have to find a way to take care of yourself physically. Tough? Heck yes. But please try.

Everything is going to be ok. With or without him you are going to survive. I promise you!

Look, it is okay to sit him down and talk about everything. Let him know your vision for the future!

Sex won't be a problem if he can STOP hurting you and consider a plan for R!!!!

He came by today to drop off DS5, he was very ummmm attentive, lol. I did not have sex with him, I did not even let him see me change clothes.
I gave him a hug and we had small talk, I lent him 20 bucks for gas.
I had all my Plan B stuff out because I was working on it this morning, he asked what it was and I said nothing. Put everything away. He continued to ask and I said no.
He let it go. But I think now he thinks I am planning something, cause I also told him I would drop off DS5 to MIL next time.

Came home and packed all of his things, it hurt a little but it is all gone now. I also put in there any cards he ever gave me, which brought me to tears because of the words. I wrote on there he is free to do with them whatever he wants. I really don't care.

Now I feel some empowerment! Like I feel a little more ready. Hopefully it lasts.

Plan B letter is done, reconciliation requirements done, working on addendum. My sister will be IM, she promised to keep it professional and not allow emotions. Anything else I need?

Email the IM training link to your sister. It will help guide her in being a "spam" filter.

What day are you planning to enter Plan B?

Thank you 20YH, I agree on the porn thing. I totally prefer that over SF with OW, who called from NJ!!! Lol, that was good news for me! Plus he is constantly asking for SF, like when we were living together, it was everyday almost.

I agree about OW, it was just so unexpected that I felt so sick yesterday. Today, much better. I was able to get the Valerian! Thank you! I agree about the exposure, her whole family wanted to say something to me. Lol. Glad I changed my number already.

Really what I am noticing is that if I do not think too hard I can survive the day, but if I have empty time then I begin thinking. Which leads to sick feeling. So it is mind over matter.

I will work on not being too available, even through text.

Thanks BH, I will send it to her. She is coming by today so I'll give it to her.

8/26 is Plan B day. He asked to drop off DS5 together, it is his first year in school. How sad, we will drop him off together first and last time.

Okay I am back with more problems.

I asked WH about the care payments and he said "Well now its going to be different. Cus I don't know how much im going to be making and ur acting all weird i dont know why you changed your number but I have a bad feeling."

I called him and asked if he was planning on not giving money for DS5, he said he can't anymore since he was fired because of me not thinking things through.He said I'm acting weird, why did I change my number, and he knows those papers were for him.

I did not know to lie or not so I said "I changed my number to see if you would be emailed or I would." He laughed and said "Bullshi*, why are you lying?" Well turns out OW family called him threatening him etc. So he is extremely angry and saying "I told you I was not contacting her anymore and all of sudden I get this effing call with them threatening me. I told you already I did not leave because of her, I was not happy. I hated living with you, always mad and criticizing me, I couldn't even breathe without you saying something!"

I replied calmly and said "I apologize that the OW family called you, they did the same to me so that is why I changed my number. As far as your job, I'm sorry you lost it."

He kept going on about how typical of me it is, why could I not leave well enough alone, I ruined everything. Etc.

I don't feel like shi*, I was very calm. I kind of understand why he is mad, it has been a month since DDay, and before I found MB I was sending her texts telling her to NC him. But now I understand why he has been distant and not wanting to talk.

Is this going to blow over? We were making progress before that day but now he had gone back to DDay attitude. Do I continue Plan A? I feel like if I jump into Plan B, he will just remember me the same as always. I feel like a effing screw up!!! Like I can't just keep Plan A steady!!

AS far as him saying typical me, it really was me like that. The criticizing, ridiculing, angry etc. So it does hurt, because I am trying to show him I will not be that way anymore but it keeps backfiring on me.

See I understand the affair, I am sure with MBs help I will get over it. But it's the fact that I committed sooooo many LBs that he does not even want to see me that hurts. He would rather live with 6 people, have no food, car or anything than to live with me one more day...

Plus he said since I contacted OW I should contact all the other ones too. I know he said it out of rage so I said that's fine if you want to tell me or not, it's up to you.

Ughhh really bummed.

Cheer up you are doing a good job. He is going to say anything to upset you just to justify his actions. Just keep doing what you are doing.

I think this has pushed them to talk again. I looked through the phone bill and they talked all day. . I should have left it alone.

He was talking with OW?

They would have talked regardless. They are probably trying to plan damage control and make you look like a demon so he can keep thinking he was justified in having an affair.

You did NOTHING wrong.

I'm sorry, but I'm catching up on your thread - have you gone to Plan B?

She is preparing for Plan B. After talking with Dr. Harley her Plan B date is Aug. 26th.

Agreed! Remember, your husband is an addict. He will get his fix any way he can, regardless of what you do or say.

Thanks guys. It is starting to wear on me. I am kind of excited for Plan B.

This is way hard and painful. I got ADs today so hopefully that will help.

He told me to leave him alone. I am thinking about backing off cause it hurts. He is acting the same way after workplace firing. I gave him space last time.

I may go into Plan B earlier for my own sanity. We will see how this week goes.

They were not talking before today, but I agree on making me out to be the crazy wife.

He said her family threatened him to not contact her. Idk. I won't believe it.

Play it by ear. No one will blame you for going into Plan B earlier than you planned. It is better to do that than to do damage to yourself.

If her family did threaten him, that's good. It will make the affair less alluring. But don't trust him