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It is real important that you do all of your exposures in one day to create a tsunami effect, so I would be real strategic about this in order to get the biggest bang for your buck. Saturday would be a good day to expose and move back home. Start the day early by going to your house and seeing if the OM is there. Take some photos and then head on over to his house and meet with his parents. From there, go to your wife's parents house and tell them all about the affair and how long it has been going on. MAKE SURE YOU TELL THEM THIS IS WHY YOUR WIFE WANTED TO BREAK UP. Don't give her any room to spin this with "CC moved out and I just hooked up with OM after he left!" After you do this, go to your parents home, get on your computer and start sending emails to your wife's friends and family. Expose to the family members of the OM via facebook. When you are done, pack your bag and move back home. Walk in and say "honey, I'm home!!"  This plan is GORGEOUS! I almost need an Ativan reading it though hahah. Her parents already know the entire story - she filled in her mom as she was becoming wayward - so that part is done. But yes, the rest of the exposure is in order! And I already know that me just moving back will throw quite the wrench into her plan. I don't think I could be in an affair if we both were living at our parents'. MWUAHAHAHAH
Last edited by ClickityClack; 08/30/13 11:42 PM.
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[
This plan is GORGEOUS! I almost need an Ativan reading it though hahah. Her parents already know the entire story - she filled in her mom as she was becoming wayward - so that part is done. But yes, the rest of the exposure is in order! Good man!!  Her parents only know her SPIN and her lies!! So I would go by there or call and tell them the truth when you get done with loserboy's parents. Tell them this affair has been going on since ____ and that is why she wanted to separate. Ask them to use their influence to persuade her to end her affair. <-----ask for their help! You will do great!!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Believe me, your anxiety levels will go way down after you blow the lid off their sleazy little affair! you will feel great. Your wife will be FURIOUS! Just be prepared and don't let her scare you. Even if she threatens to call the police or DOES call the police. Don't leave your home. Sometimes the police will try and persuade the man to leave just to keep the peace. Tell them you are there to be peaceful and have no intention of causing trouble. She probably won't do that, but just in case, you need to be prepared, ok? When she is angry, just say "I am so sorry you are upset but I am here to stay!" Then SMILE and be pleasant.  Can you do this? [I believe you can!!]
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Believe me, your anxiety levels will go way down after you blow the lid off their sleazy little affair! you will feel great. Your wife will be FURIOUS! Just be prepared and don't let her scare you. Even if she threatens to call the police or DOES call the police. Don't leave your home. Sometimes the police will try and persuade the man to leave just to keep the peace. Tell them you are there to be peaceful and have no intention of causing trouble. She probably won't do that, but just in case, you need to be prepared, ok? When she is angry, just say "I am so sorry you are upset but I am here to stay!" Then SMILE and be pleasant. Can you do this? [I believe you can!!] I know that I would feel like an empowered destroyer of all things unholy. I THINK I can do the face-to-face exposing, but I know I HAVE to! The moving back home will be super easy - I'm very excited to see her reaction.
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You might want to get a VAR to carry on you when you go home so she can't spin any abuse story.
Also be dressed and looking good and smelling good.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I THINK I can do the face-to-face exposing, but I know I HAVE to! This is the trait that will help you the MOST. Everyone is very nervous and scared about exposures and the fallout. It is scary! The difference between success and failure is the ability to act despite your fears! The fact that you have made this decision because you know it is right means you have what it takes to succeed. One of my favorite quotes in situations like this: If you're going through hell, keep going. - Winston Churchill
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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You might want to get a VAR to carry on you when you go home so she can't spin any abuse story.
Also be dressed and looking good and smelling good. I doubt she would try to do that, but hey, I also doubted that she'd ever leave me. Is this VAR just for the confrontation, or do I keep it in the house at all times? I will be dressed to depress [her]! Do some bicep curls right before I show up.
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You might want to get a VAR to carry on you when you go home so she can't spin any abuse story.
Also be dressed and looking good and smelling good. I doubt she would try to do that, but hey, I also doubted that she'd ever leave me. Is this VAR just for the confrontation, or do I keep it in the house at all times? I will be dressed to depress [her]! Do some bicep curls right before I show up. Definitely for when you walk back home and then just keep it around in case you need it. Don't Put anything past a Wayward. We've seen it many, many times. Have you read this? Craziest Things to Come out of a Wayward's Piehole
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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You might want to get a VAR to carry on you when you go home so she can't spin any abuse story.
Also be dressed and looking good and smelling good. I doubt she would try to do that, but hey, I also doubted that she'd ever leave me. Is this VAR just for the confrontation, or do I keep it in the house at all times? I will be dressed to depress [her]! Do some bicep curls right before I show up. Definitely for when you walk back home and then just keep it around in case you need it. Don't Put anything past a Wayward. We've seen it many, many times. Have you read this? Craziest Things to Come out of a Wayward's PieholeOh my LOL! Thank you for sharing!
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Good luck today. Let us know how it goes.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Glad to see the cavalry charging here, CC.
You see, while you have fewer things to entice your WW back (length of marital history, children) that does not, in any way, mean that you cannot recover your marriage.
Truth is, your marriage has been blighted by stupid social ideas; that maintaining friendships with former lovers is an "ok" thing to do when you are married.
If you are going to recover this, BOTH of you are going to have to go forward with iron-clad extraordinary precautions in your marriage - the cornerstone of affair-proofing your marriage.
I repeat; BOTH of you.
So, while you have a short marital history, if you handle this properly and WW responds, you can have a much brighter marital FUTURE.
"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr
"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer
"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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Thank you, HHH!
After all this yesterday, I realized that maybe I shouldn't be with a person who pursues an affair 3 years into a marriage.
So the situation right now:
I've moved back in (haven't been able to expose yet), and now WW is FURIOUSLY upset. Now she wants to make a formal separation agreement and asks how long I'll be staying at the house. What do I tell her? Do I say at least a few weeks or do I say something like 'until you leave OM'?
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Thank you, HHH!
After all this yesterday, I realized that maybe I shouldn't be with a person who pursues an affair 3 years into a marriage.
So the situation right now:
I've moved back in (haven't been able to expose yet), and now WW is FURIOUSLY upset. Now she wants to make a formal separation agreement and asks how long I'll be staying at the house. What do I tell her? Do I say at least a few weeks or do I say something like 'until you leave OM'? Tell her to have her lawyer contact your lawyer but you have no plans on ever leaving. And then drive to the OM's house and follow through on the exposure strategy I outlined above! Stick to your plan, CC!!! I have full confidence in you!! You must move forward and kill the affair today.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Thank you, HHH!
After all this yesterday, I realized that maybe I shouldn't be with a person who pursues an affair 3 years into a marriage.
So the situation right now:
I've moved back in (haven't been able to expose yet), and now WW is FURIOUSLY upset. Now she wants to make a formal separation agreement and asks how long I'll be staying at the house. What do I tell her? Do I say at least a few weeks or do I say something like 'until you leave OM'? Tell her to have her lawyer contact your lawyer but you have no plans on ever leaving. And then drive to the OM's house and follow through on the exposure strategy I outlined above! Stick to your plan, CC!!! I have full confidence in you!! You must move forward and kill the affair today. Yes Clickety please follow the Plan and Stick to your plan. Good job moving back. Of course she's furious because you threw a huge wrench in affair land. Since OM lives with his parents now they have no place to carry on their dirty deeds.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I've moved back in (haven't been able to expose yet), and now WW is FURIOUSLY upset. Get your money's worth!! Since she is already furious, you might as well do your best to kill her affair today. LAUNCH THE NUKE, MY FRIEND!!!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Moving back in with out exposing as outlined to you is a waste of time.
So expose NOW!
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Oh there's definitely going to be some exposure happening. I don't know where OM (his parents) live, so I was thinking about catching them after they go to church tomorrow since I know where that is and they will be feeling all holy and ethical.
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Oh there's definitely going to be some exposure happening. I don't know where OM (his parents) live, so I was thinking about catching them after they go to church tomorrow since I know where that is and they will be feeling all holy and ethical. What about OM's ex? Were you able to get a hold of her?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Oh there's definitely going to be some exposure happening. I don't know where OM (his parents) live, so I was thinking about catching them after they go to church tomorrow since I know where that is and they will be feeling all holy and ethical. CC, you need to get this done TODAY. Why not call them or find out where they live? Have you exposed to her parents? Have you exposed to his facebook friends? Family members? Don't dawdle on this. Get this done TODAY. Be comprehensive and be complete. Trickle exposures will avail you nothing except a ticked off wayward wife for NO GOOD REASON. Don't drop the ball now!!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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