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My plan, after my appointment, to stop by his house and just say the following:
"I know you and my wife had a thing for a while, well we are working on our marriage and I appreciate it if you wouldn't contact her again at any point."


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For jealousy arouses a husband's fury, and he will show no mercy
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you have a VAR? What about his mother that is your main target for exposure not the POSOM

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I can use my phone to record.
I plan to be respectful, and say "Ma'am. My wife and your son have had a short term affair. My wife and I are currently working on our marriage and I would appreciate it if you can tell your son to not contact my wife again."


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Is that too nice?


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Sounds great to me, might want to give your phone record a test run before hand to ensure it works.

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I have done it before. I have recorded conversations and people talking, unaware.


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For jealousy arouses a husband's fury, and he will show no mercy
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Sounds too nice to me. Here is what you wrote:

"I know you and my wife had a thing for a while, well we are working on our marriage and I appreciate it if you wouldn't contact her again at any point."

I would say instead,

"I know about the affair you and my wife were in. We are still married. Stay away from her."

Walk out slowly (backwards if he looks like he wants to engage in physical stuff) and leave the room.

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Originally Posted by Justthe3ofus
Sounds too nice to me. Here is what you wrote:

"I know you and my wife had a thing for a while, well we are working on our marriage and I appreciate it if you wouldn't contact her again at any point."

I would say instead,

"I know about the affair you and my wife were in. We are still married. Stay away from her."

Walk out slowly (backwards if he looks like he wants to engage in physical stuff) and leave the room.


I would love if he wanted to have physical engagement. I like that better.

If he says something smart to me, then can I hit him?


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Originally Posted by ChristianSamuari
Originally Posted by Justthe3ofus
Sounds too nice to me. Here is what you wrote:

"I know you and my wife had a thing for a while, well we are working on our marriage and I appreciate it if you wouldn't contact her again at any point."

I would say instead,

"I know about the affair you and my wife were in. We are still married. Stay away from her."

Walk out slowly (backwards if he looks like he wants to engage in physical stuff) and leave the room.


I would love if he wanted to have physical engagement. I like that better.

If he says something smart to me, then can I hit him?

Haha. We all feel like that. But don't let his bad karma become your bad karma. No violence. But no Mr. Nice Guy either. Be strong. Be firm. And have an exit strategy.

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Yea the last thing you want is some POSOM suing you for breaking his @$@#$#@$ face lol.

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What if he swings first?


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Yea, bring a friend along for safety

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I will make sure to keep it cordial. I am going to let him know whats up.


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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Yea, bring a friend along for safety

I didn't think about that... that's a good idea.


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Why are you going to be cordial? What the heck?

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Cordial for me is not shaking his hand and crap.


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Originally Posted by ChristianSamuari
What if he swings first?

If he swings first? Green light to let loose!

I chose not to confront the POSOM in my situation. I knew there would be no possible way that I could contain myself. I would be no good to my children in jail. I actually waited for him twice outside his home...didn't knock but waited..waited..to this day I am very glad he did not pop his head out.

Wouldn't have been pretty. Not at all.

Good luck!



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Originally Posted by Justthe3ofus
Why are you going to be cordial? What the heck?

Exactly.


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Originally Posted by BrainHurts
Originally Posted by ChristianSamuari
This advice sucks...sorry... but Harley wants to go to the guy and be cordial...Ahh! I rather whip his butt. Well, I better grow a pair and go over there.
After relistening to the clips, did you hear the correct purpose Dr. Harley says to confront the OM?
Did you listen to the clips again?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Originally Posted by ChristianSamuari
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Yea, bring a friend along for safety

I didn't think about that... that's a good idea.

You need to bring a friend that will be there as a witness and someone to help restrain you if there is any risk of trouble.

Years ago, you could have challenged him to a duel and shot and killed the lowly worm but unfortunately that's not allowed and the govrnment would place you in prison if you even punch him.....

Hopefully if you expose to his mommy that he lives with, she will end it

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