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So why is she trying to call me? What does she want from me? Does she want to see my pain? How someone you trusted in confided your most deepest secrets and dreams can do this to another person. She will go back and forth between you and the lover. That's why Dr. Harley recommends Plan A for about 6 months, followed by Plan B if the affair has not yet died. Remember: Exposure speeds up the death of an affair, so I would post the evidence you have on the internet so OM is fully exposed and cant just tell everyone that "you are crazy"
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I'm on my way to work. I have to report to are medical section to be reinstated. I have to see where everything goes with restraining order. Per my union restraining orders our common occurrence. I will be talking to my lawyer today. I may have to get another attorney for this situation. My wife sent me a Another text "I need to talk to you please". And then this one "So is this your new tactic...not speaking to me. "Come home....oh never mind....Im not speaking to you. Ridiculous!". She keeps trying to calll me. See she says things to bait me to call her. I need time right now. Remember, most union contracts allow for a union representative to be present during any disciplinary action. Private sector employees have this protection through federal law; I dont know if public employees do. Ask your union rep if you have the right to have a "union representative present during any disciplinary meeting," and EXERCISE that right going forward.
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Do you have friends or family nearby. Is your daughter back with you? As you recover from the past 5 days it would be good to have support with your or at the very least nearby.
Do you know if you will be continuing work this week, or are they going to give you some time off. After what you've been through, you probably should not be out on the beat.
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I would still like to try and reconcile with my wife. I would like to address the n/c LETTER. I'm curious on what she wanted from me. How long should I keep from talking to her. She just tried calling me like 20 times. And text me a bunch of nasty text calling me names this is my fault and how she just wants to talk to me about the house and she was there for me and I'm being selfish it's all about me. I haven't respond to her.
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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I was in a meeting with my works medical section. The Sgt. Told me she was sorry for has happen to me and was unaware of the place I went to. They want me to Wright a paragraph on my experience in this hospital.. She also told me that she commends me on how I stood up for my marriage and how I'm willing to reconcile after infidelity. She also told me I'm a very rare person who is still willing to love his wife after all of this. She even gave me a hug. My wife was blowing my phone up I showed the Sgt. The Sgt said she might still want to reconcile with you.
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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I did ask for some extra time to get some things in order. So I report back to them on Friday.
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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So why is she trying to call me? What does she want from me? Does she want to see my pain? How someone you trusted in confided your most deepest secrets and dreams can do this to another person. She will go back and forth between you and the lover. That's why Dr. Harley recommends Plan A for about 6 months, followed by Plan B if the affair has not yet died. Remember: Exposure speeds up the death of an affair, so I would post the evidence you have on the internet so OM is fully exposed and cant just tell everyone that "you are crazy" She has never called me like this. I'm not sure about the text though, about me being selfish and her calling me f'ing [censored]. Blaming me for my life being out of order and me causing everyone else's life from being out of order..
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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"I need to concentrate on putting my life back together now. Please give me that space." Did you send the text that Melody suggested? If your wife is sending nasty texts to you, I can promise that she is not going to be interested in your addressing the n/c letter. Why not send the text that Melody suggested, and then shut your phone off for an hour or so? Good that you get some time off until Friday. You have been doing a super job (and quite inspirational!) of plan A so far, but it is plain from your posts that you are (understandably) tired and worn down. If you can, get some exercise today, eat something healthy, drink plenty of water, and rest as much as possible.
DDays - six months of them THANK YOU God and Marriage Builders. We never knew that it could be this good! 
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I'm not sure on how I should respond to her.
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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I would still like to try and reconcile with my wife. I would like to address the n/c LETTER. I'm curious on what she wanted from me. How long should I keep from talking to her. She just tried calling me like 20 times. And text me a bunch of nasty text calling me names this is my fault and how she just wants to talk to me about the house and she was there for me and I'm being selfish it's all about me. I haven't respond to her. I'd turn it off so you don't have to listen to her babble. She is intent on attacking you today because she knows you have been through a lot. She knows if she can get you to crack or be angry that THIS is the day. You can introduce the NC letter another day. Today you have to protect yourself, see a lawyer and I would avoid her in this mood. Think about war strategy, would you want to tango on the day the enemy (the affair) was spoiling for a fight or would you wait for a time more suited to you? When they are more likely to be caught unawares? I think every BH dealing with a WW should have an 'out of area' message relayed by their phone!
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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did you see the post that I just sent? We were posting at the same time. Just above your post.
DDays - six months of them THANK YOU God and Marriage Builders. We never knew that it could be this good!
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One of her last text stated "You're basically stating that everything that you told me is a lie Thanks". referring to getting back together. She is pretty relentless right now.
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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I'm not sure on how I should respond to her. I agree with Jedi. She is vacillating between you and the OM. If it were me, I would just send the text Melody suggested or just let it go all together for now. Play it totally cool. Personally, I think she might be freaking out that she simply can't get a hold of you. I suspect she might actually be missing you. Just let her vent. Do not get sucked into her drama. Right now she is looking kind of crazy. Don't you think? Don't let your actions validate her perceptions of you. Being as cool as possible will take all her ammo away to villainies you. I would let this whole thing cool off if it were me. No more exposure, no more inflaming the issue. Just let it simmer.
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"I need to concentrate on putting my life back together now. Please give me that space." Did you send the text that Melody suggested? If your wife is sending nasty texts to you, I can promise that she is not going to be interested in your addressing the n/c letter. Why not send the text that Melody suggested, and then shut your phone off for an hour or so? Good that you get some time off until Friday. You have been doing a super job (and quite inspirational!) of plan A so far, but it is plain from your posts that you are (understandably) tired and worn down. If you can, get some exercise today, eat something healthy, drink plenty of water, and rest as much as possible. I did send that text from Mel. And that's when I phone began blowing up and the text came in. She told me once she talks to me I can have permenant space. Blahaha
ME46
WW 38
D-day 2/13/14
Ephesians 5:11-13
11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.
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Based on WW's texts she clearly just wants to beat you down some more to bait a response to try and validate her actions. Do not give in and get yourself in order. Go see a lawyer, get advice on what you can do to be protected and then go do something you enjoy. Go shooting at the range, take a bike ride or a jog. It will make you feel alot better to get some fresh air and get this off your mind for a little.
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I'm not sure on how I should respond to her. Send that and add something like you will be unavailable by phone for quite a while. That will put her in a nice 'think about what you have done' time out place.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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One of her last text stated "You're basically stating that everything that you told me is a lie Thanks". referring to getting back together. She is pretty relentless right now. Ha! This is actually showing that your plan is working! She is intrigued by your pursuit of her and now that you have stopped, she is trying to bait you. Don't let it work. I would just let it go for a week or so. A lot can happen between now and then. Her emotions are all over the place. I am sure you can see that. Don't get sucked in.
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once she talks to me I can have permenant space. Blahaha Indeed. You just need to ignore her now.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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One of her last text stated "You're basically stating that everything that you told me is a lie Thanks". referring to getting back together. She is pretty relentless right now. Ha! This is actually showing that your plan is working! She is intrigued by your pursuit of her and now that you have stopped, she is trying to bait you. Don't let it work. Yup. Waywards love cake. As soon as you stop the cake turnstile they're all "Hey where's my cake?"
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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Truthfully, if you can give yourself some time to think about everything that has happened, your perceptions of her might change.
Once you stop pursing for a time, she will miss you even more.
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