Sweet. Like Sue in the book, "Surviving an Affair", the OM will find your wife to be too much trouble. All the fun of their sleazy affair has been sucked out and they are now left with only the sleaze.

AM

So agree, army mama. As a recovering alcoholic I marveled at how alike an active alcoholic is to a wayward. I think that inside track has helped me immensely in seeing through the fog. It takes one to know one.

Affairs are no fun when everyone is looking!!

She is pissed, she is now saying the way I treated her and SS has caused her enormous pain and thats why I am divorcing you, its over get it through your head its your fault and stop blaming everyone else. She even sent another one telling me to get out of the house and she is sick of me harassing and stalking.. Apparently I caused some more conflict in fantasy land. she called

Thankfully, I had not had that experience. But, during my H's affair, I learned a great deal about addiction. And I think another one of Dr. Harley's great strengths is his experience from running addiction treatment centers and his application of the principles to infidelity.

AM

Another blow to fantasy land!

I just feel like saying something to her, I guess yesterday was just her getting her fix from me, I don't even know what to make of yesterday anymore, I almost feel foolish for allowing me to fall for this, or was there something she needed from me, I gave her affection we had intimate conversation, SF, quality time, I cooked. She even said it was great as long as we don't bring up the problems.

Its interesting in HNHN, he talkes about letting go of problems, My wife will hang on to the problem for ever, even if we resolve it. I remember when we got married just befor we walked down the alter, we told eachother we will do everything and anything to keep from getting divorce, we will work on our Marriage. It never happened. Here I am fighting like I have never fought in my life. I'm amazed at everything, what was monday all about when I didn;t answer her. I probably need to pull back some.

I havent responded to any of those text. I like how she said she forward all the text to my medical section SGT. lets just get one thing straight, that department does not own me.

The funny thing is my wife told me the same thing when I was in the hospital, that the department acts like they own you and can do anything with you. but there she is blowing smoke up my butt saying she forward those text. I'm starting to get sick to my stomach for the way she is acting, its such a turn off. I even notice little things just set her off and she starts swearing the f word etc...she never use to talk like this, what is it, the stress, the OM, what. I don't swear at home, I do at work.

I know you are pissed and hurt right now but you tried to believe someone who doesn't have your best interests at heart right now, she is still the alien�.
Monday was a good thing she is still your wife and you shared a great day together.
WD she is in conflict even through all her anger��..She now must know that affair is going no where there is no way she can convince people it was just a friendship that she is going to have to own it��..
Do not leave your home, she is the one that left, let her stay out of the house�
she is just trying to strong arm you, just tell her you are so disappointed in her �.
I think your right I would pull back a lot so she knows this is unacceptable this is where you want her, now she has to choose not just hide���.
She is going to say all kinds of awful things you can take that but you can't take that affair continuing. So the blow to it is awesome.
sit tight now, let her come to you, if she blows up your phone ask her to leave you alone that the pain is to great with the news you received.
Leave it at that with no contact for a couple of days.

This is a good thing, not a bad thing. You are causing confusion about the affair by being so kind to her. You leverage that by causing conflict in the affair when you can. She desperately needs to keep the affair secret so her fantasy will thrive. By telling her you know, you throw more acid on her fantasy.

Jess, thanks I know, I will just sit back for now. I don't know how she ever thought that she could bring him to light, how?, she told everyone he was just a friend. You get divorce and then a month later high everyone this OM, and everyone will know oh thats the guy WD said she was having an affair with, and he was sent to a mental hospital for telling everyone she was having an A, he was telling the truth. Thats when people will hate you for what you have done. Whats funny is why would I lie about her having an affair. I have owned up to all my wrong doings in this M. Wife keeps thinking its my fault and thats why sheis having an A.

why do I feel like someone is throwing acid into my stomach right now. I can't believe more people haven't heard of Dr. Harley and exposing affairs. I see why to do it, so it kills it. it maks so much sense even though it doesn't feel right to cause so much conflict and drama. I have had enough for a life time.

She got that mad that I knew what she was doing while I was in a mental hospital while she was playing house with OM. My life everything was at stake and thats where she was. How the heck could she keep a straight face, knowing that I could of been there awhile. I would like to know her roll in this. Nevermind, I have been in her shoes, I know how it feels, how selfish you become.

I like how everytime she gets mad at me she wants me out of the house. I bet being at GF she cant get to crazy over there. she might scare her Gf. It blows my mind that her GF BF cheated on her and she threw him out and she has no problem having my wife a cheater in her house.

Our culture believes very much in facilitating affairs and we have been brainwashed into acceptance. That is why 60% of marriages experience affairs. It is just amazing.

Have you ever watched a movie and thought it was so "romantic" and then years later realized how revolting it really was? One that comes to mind is Bridges of Madison County, one of the filthiest, vilest movies around. It is a romanticized movie about an old wh*re who does some loser in her HUSBAND'S OWN BED while he is away at the county fair with their children. What in the world is romantic about that??

And just think about the kind of morality that dictates keeping a known affair secret from the betrayed spouse with the excuse of "I don't want to hurt him! Its none of my business!" Would we apply that odd logic to crimes like embezzlement or child molestation?

"Oh, I don't want to tell my neighbor his bookkeeper is stealing him blind because I don't want to hurt him."

Who would ever accept that kind of morality? Yet, people say this every day about victims of adultery. It makes no sense whatsoever that these odd "rules" are applied to such a despicable act.

In short, the notion that we should keep adultery a big secret is the doctrine of devils. I believe that with all my heart.

I'll bet OM has a neighbor in mind who would be leaking information. He's probably looking out the window right now.

There used to be laws on the books against adultery. It is still against the law to commit adultery in Michigan, by the way. Dr Harley believes people should go to jail for committing adultery. Especially people who have affairs with the spouse of a deployed soldier. He thinks they should get 10 years!

Adultry was punished by death, now its encouraged. My wife bought me two real nice bibles prior to coming and visiting me saturday in the hosp. I thought wow she was thinking of me. The devil has my wife right now, I positive of that. I do know if I would done nothing, she and POSOSM would of went on about there business and then one day the Devil came up behind them and blew their flame out. Now how long would that of been not sure. I had to do something.