When you speak to his pastor, tell him you are getting reports that they are seeing each other every day so the affair has not ended.

I'm curious what she meant by the POSOM is getting calls. And its funny that she says that she is not staying with him but she knows this.

Can you put a VAR in her car? Would this jeopardize your job? This kind of intel will help you to know what the two are saying to each other and give you more information into the nature of their scheme.

I have to say, WD, you are a bigger man than me. Your wife's behavior is utterly reprehensible, and her behavior far surpasses my threshold of tolerance.

YES!!!!! You need to do this, WD. Find out what they are saying.

She said he is getting harassing and threatening calls everyday. She also said she never was with him when I was in the hospital, now we know this is a lie. I believe he must be pushing her hard to sell and be divorced.

I don't think you need to do petty stuff like calling OM about Wed.

WW is a one person havoc avalanche. All you need to do is drop a snowball on the slope now and then. She turns it into a landslide all on her own.

You can stick to the high road and be plenty effective. Just keep up your plan A while speaking uncomfortable truth to her.

You are clearly the best option for her. She needs a source of stability. You are bedrock!

Keep reminding her she can make a safe landing with you.

Right now she is a being blown about in a whirlwind of her own making. It must be exhausting for her to stay so pissed.

I just talk to his pastor and he told me he can't get involved in this matter, I asked what kind of pastor is he that he can't get involved with a church member who plays in his church band that is committing adultery, He hung up on me.

She is relentless right now. I just continue to be nice to her. Its hard to get a word in though. I do manage to do it. She will always try to keep me quiete so she get out wee selling the house and you need to make a descision, I usually just say the attorneys can handle that. She knows i'm stalling.

If she lists the house, call the realtor and explain that she doesn't have your consent to sell marital property. That will get back to her fast.

The realtor will be reluctant to advertise or show the property while risking the chance of the deal getting quashed. Better to show their buyers a house they can actually sell! Getting an offer would be just the start of the circus!

Then there would be the fun of the buyer getting financing while the title would be in dispute!

If they put a sign in your yard, you could put up a sign too. "Not really for sale. Seller's betrayed husband."

If they have one of those plastic boxes with a flyer for the house, you could put in a flyer about OM. That would be fun.

How about fostering puppies for a rescue group in the guest room? You could replace the carpet later.

WD, you need to text her and tell her that you have decided to volunteer for the humane society and will be fostering puppies. Does she want to help you raise the puppies?

Why do I feel like i'm losing this battle?? What does this guy have??? How can he have this much juce s to speak. I need to figure a stratedgy out.

I think that would be great, but I don't think she will buy it. It is funny though.

Did you see how the OM pastor said he won't get involved in this matter. He hung up on me, when I asked what kind of pastor excepts this kind of behavior adultery from his church band member.

"We've been over that. You know where I stand. Would you like me to help SS with his math?"

If she goes on, set the phone on the counter and leave the room. Letting her go on for ten minutes only to discover she's been talking to herself will discourage the verbal tantrum more than hanging up. It soaks off some of that whirlwind energy. Also it forces her to give you a chance to speak if she wants to know if she has an audience.

Buy a drum set as a gift for SS. Have it delivered to where she is staying with GF

You just feel like you are losing because you haven't seen how this plays out. You do have a strategy and that is to continue to look for opportunities to make lovebank deposits and continue to compete with this selfish, thoughtless turd.

Their affair is crumbling as we speak because of your exposure. They are boxed into a corner right now and the traits that made the affair possible, thoughtlessness, selfishness and deceit will eventually make their way into the affair. This guy is a user and a loser and that will become clear soon enough.

This affair can't go far because your wife will have to keep this a secret or she will be proven a LIAR. So what does she do? Continue to hide like a cockroach?

95% of affairs die within 2 years. 65% of marriages don't end over affairs. So guess who my money is on??

You just need to chill and do your best to show that you are the best option. You ARE the best option over this scumbag.

That does not surprise me one bit given that denomination.

Drum set would be cool. Defiently drive her GF nuts..

That does not surprise me one bit given that denomination. [/quotthe first time I called him he said he would talk to him. I guess they don't care.