I went and picked up my medical records today. I went into the hospital where I was incarcerated at for 3 days. I felt extremley anxious when I was there. I picked up my records and the I told the lady my story and she didn't charge me for them. That was nice of her. I went into the chapel and I broke down crying on my knees praying to God. I feel like some of this pain, hurt and sorrow is catching up to me. I cried for WW and mine pain. As I type this I feel the pain for the both of us. I know she has to be torn and broken, I feel so much for her pain and I think I forget about my own. I truly would love to just hold her as tight as I can in my arms. I always remember me holding her every night we went to bed and when I worked afteroons I would come home and kiss her and then hold her.

I sit her looking back at our marriage and I know that is know where what she is making it out to be. We had issues like any other couple.

I think she not only doesn't want to respond but doesn't know how to do so. She must feel she has to maintain her unflinching cold, demanding demeanor but, inside, it has to be tearing her apart.

I'd look into filing a complaint with the medical board regarding the dr that wrote the false report. A threat to his license may be more effective than a civil suit.

It sounds like he's a quack who's found a job in which his patients don't choose him.

Under pressure he's likely to spill who influenced him

I'd also try to get him recused from any future care or evaluations involving you.

Any chance your WW sleazy employer has a hand in your situation ?

Here's your show.
Radio Show of wifedivorcing's Show

Read more on Plan A, you need to be careful about pursuing. Pursuing will look very weak and unattractive. No i love you's, no i miss you's, no begging or pleading.

There is a list of DO's and DON'Ts in plan A, that are very specific and effective.
Keep inviting her/SS to do things with the family or alone. You are doing great and a true warrior.

I hope you are vindicated and all the people that did evil to you are punished.

Because in essence, typically when a Betrayed Spouse makes attempts at ignoring the elephant in the room, i.e. her "Current" choice to desire a divorce, you are invalidating her, basically telling her she doesn't know how to think for herself and make big girl decisions for herself, even though that may be more than partially true in her current state.

Excessive mushy romantics are not going to usually make her feel safe, because your desires are in opposite contrast to her current desires.

Remember about the Pursuit vs. Distance Dance that was spoken about earlier?

Take it down a couple of notches and just try to get along without any additional conflict, which she can justify why she is not with you right now.

And, you are still mind reading her messages, aren't you?

LTL

I like your idea about leaving her a piece of cake. Just that little thing shows you are thinking of her. It will tell her she is important to you. I am glad that you know that you need to do this now!!

What Nerlycrzy said. She doesn't know how to respond. She has to stay disconnected. You know she is living in a fantasy world. So, when someone lives there, they really can't be too honest with themselves.

I also agree with ICGB. I would file a complaint with the medical board on the Dr. that wrote that false report. Any chance of having that removed? That was just so blatantly false, that I can't imagine not trying to have it removed permanently.

I have know idea if her scumbag boss would get involved. My IC read the reprt from the ER doctor and was just taken by it. I was labeled as psychoyic person who was unable to take care of himself and was homicidle / suicidle without any regards to others. This nut wanted me to take haldol and even put it in his report I refused to. he stated I was agitated Let see Yes I was agitated, who wouldn't be.

Three days later I'm cured without any drugs or any real treatment. The doctor labeled me as normal and no issues and was put back to full duty.

Good question.

But I was wondering if sleaze dr might also be after WW or encouraging her waywardness

I havent begged or pleaded since this began. I do tell you she has said to me I haven't showed alot of emotion, referring to me crying etc.. I have teared talking to her, I do pull back. The I love yous and miss you's I havent done much, of that. I'll go back and read plan A again.

The truth will prevail which will allow the evil to pay for there wrongdoings.

Yep...this explains how he has slowly built a love bank balance with her over time. He probably flirted with her when she came in. probably flirts with all the women. I think he's just evil. Harley says to "build your life around your marriage."
I think OM philosophy is "build your career, hobbies and church around opportunities for women"

That's why you need to reach out to her...keep YOU on HER mind

"I'd look into filing a complaint with the medical board regarding the dr that wrote the false report. A threat to his license may be more effective than a civil suit."

ItCan - I don't think WD needs to be incited to undertake another aggressive reaction. As I understand he has his medical records and is working with his attorney to investigate possible violation of his civil and patient's rights. Sounds like he has his situation well in hand. I agree with NebDane and others in implementing Plan A to the ultimate at this point, and that should be his focus, rather than instigating more legal action. Am sure his attorney will handle that for him.

WD, I did include you in the intercession part of the Mass I attended last Sunday. Just a small thing, but most often God hears. It sounds like you are doing better.

Tom

ItCan.

Wow! Way off tangent!

Tom

Yes, Tom.
God does hear the prayers of his children.
The book of Tobit is a great example of God's hand in listening and responding to prayers of the faithful, in particular pertaining to marriage.

So LTL what do you think is going to make her feel safe, I simply asked her about her day and when she asked about mine and how great I was doing she wanted to drag me down which I don't think my text and the suggestions where invalidating her feelings. My text actually praised her and SS, I even owned up to my wrong doings by letting her know I messed up as a husband. I then included that I am working on being a better husband and father. I don't think they wer mushy romantic. The romantic ones I do will be light. Texting something funny is hard.

I did notice when i text her, I got the Hey! Like you suprised me by texting.

Like I did yesterday she wanted to bring up conflict and I shut it down, by simply being vague with my PPO etc...and then with the divorce, me saying you know where I stand and saying lets just enjoy the time together.

One thing I know she will listen to what I have to say, when it comes to saving our marriage, she has even told me she listens. Now what shedoes with it afterwords is another thing.

I just have to put her in a safe place with me. She likes to sart conflict, it seems like its a test to get me angry to curseat her. I never do, so that has to be sinking into her brain.

I appreciate the prayer. Thank you.

I know this guy is something else. My wife has told me several times she hates her job there, she has even told me the doctor she works for is creepy.

I've been in a VERY SIMILAR situation to yours...and found that if you go to google and search "romantic text" you will find websites devoted to this, listing hundreds of texts ready to send