That's probably best for them.

Yes, in fact, we understand better than you do. This is your excuse for not doing Plan B. The proper approach is to solve this problem instead of stopping at it. The fact that you stop instead of solving the problem is evidence that you are depressed.

I will be your IM.

Ask a vet on this board to be an internet IM for you and setup your child exchanges to be done at her or your home without having to have contact and all communication should be through the IM. Many people have done that in the past.

It seems like you are just melodramatic and are looking for empathy. Look, we get it the situation sucks but do something about it.

Here is a volunteer for you! She has experienced Plan B, too, and understands the duties of a good IM. If you want to go into Plan B with your wife, then notify the moderators that you would like to exchange email addresses with Loyal.

I may be mistaken, but if i recall correctly, i think that Jedi Knight has also previously volunteered to offer his services to act as an IM on your behalf quite a long time ago, but you "Couldn't" take him up on that offer.

Yes, you ARE depressed!!!

You REFUSE to take an Anti-Depressant because you THINK that medication will turn you into a zombie.

No, that is NOT how they work and even if the first prescription or dosage wasn't working properly, then changes in dosage or an alternative medication could be sought out.

But..... You are Too Depressed to even contemplate how much they could help you out.

Now, how is your patent and invention concept going?

LTL

I appreciate the offers to be a communications IM, but there is still the matter of exchanging the girls. I am not making excuses here.

Family: My parents have refused. They are not home half the time and do not want to be committed to helping. Remember that I am not really speaking to my mother. They are the only family in the same state.

Friends: I don't really have anyone I can ask who is even remotely convenient. Her friends all sided with her, so they are not an option. I suppose I could put it on her to find someone, but I can imagine how that would go over.

Church: I go to a large church that is not 'open' at all hours. They have 10,000 people through there on a given weekend so their staff can't offer those kinds of perks to members.

There is no one else that I can think of whom I trust enough.

Keep in mind that I have an hour commute. I get home at 6:30 on a GOOD day if I have nowhere to stop. Day care closes at 6 and they are not open Saturday or Sunday nights.

Most people have family nearby and I understand that. I don't have anyone here who I am that close to who would do this for me.

I would appreciate stop accusing me of making excuses because I am not. These are not excuses - they are reasons. I would LOVE to have an intermediary for the girls but I have no options.

What is your current visitation/ pick up/ drop off like? Maybe we can help with that.

Going well, thanks. About a week away from getting parts made for prototypes. I found a corporate attorney and I am beginning the process of forming the corporation and all that fun stuff. Website is next, along with bringing in investor money (I have $10k from one investor to get us through prototyping). Once protos are done I will do marketing videos and photos and will get it ready for preorders. Lots to do.

Regarding the antidepressants, I am not 100% opposed to them, but I have read a lot of bad things about them. I had a GF who was on them and she was batguanoloco.

In a month I will become a temporary employee here where I have been working the past year. That means I will get BENEFITS so maybe I will investigate.

***

I pray all the time for my family to be together. I pray for the opportunity to become the person my ex wife wants to be with again. Things are straightening for me in a big way and I realize that some of those prayers are being answered. I am not sitting still or moping around, but not seeing my girls during the week is never going to be easy.

I pick them up Fridays after work. Usually 6:30ish.

Every other weekend I have them until Saturday evening around 8pm.

Every other weekend until Sunday around 8pm.


However, she randomly asks me to pick them up at school or bring them back earlier or keep them on "her" weekend or what have you - and if I already have an obligation, she gets furious as if I am here for her convenience.

Where are pick ups and drop offs? Do you live close to the kids? Are the ages you have for them current? They are 5 and 2?

WalMart parking lot is the exchange location, usually. Sometimes it is the other direction at Target. I live about 10 minutes from WM which is about 3 minutes from the kids, but it is on my way home from the train station.

So, you could go to the house, honk and the kids could come to the car by themselves and vice versa. How can you make that work?

I thought about that, but

1) She has a restraining order which is still in effect as far as I know.

2) I don't want her knowing where I live. I grew tired of being served court papers when she knew where I was before. Perhaps it is 'safe' now that the divorce has been final for a year, but I would not put it past her to demand more child support at any given moment. Even though I am working, I am just breaking even with what I am paying. When I become an employee, my take-home will actually be less, probably.

I had thought about asking her to drop them off at my house, but I'm not sure yet how well a Plan B would work if she is getting that close. Also, she will have a problem with that because it is "out of her way."

1) you've been breaking any RO she might have had anyway so I don't think that applies though you can check the public records to see if it still in effect. They normally expire after a year.

2) I'm talking about YOU doing the pick up and drop offs. That would prevent her from coming to your house and would save her the trips (which might be an LB deposit for you)

Any extra requests for you to take the kids would have to come through an IM which would eliminate any "extra" chats ( which are filled with lovebusters).

The POSOM is at her house often. I am not going there when he is there. LB or not, I am not really flexible on that point.

You would not be interacting with either of them in any way though. If this is done correctly, you wouldn't even see them. You pull up, kids walk to car and off you go.

I'll think about that.

I'm considering a compromise with the girls/az situation. I'm thinking about renting a car and going out Tuesday and coming back Sunday, leaving them there for the next week.

Give me an opportunity to catch up and do some plinking.

You still talk with her father. Why not have him be the IM?

He lives in another state. Also, my xW does not speak to him much. He does not approve of the adultery and divorce and she knows it.