Wait what..? Im not trying to make a point Im just sayin. My relationship is a mess because Im an idiot. Im demanding and wanted my cake and to eat it too. I wanted my way regardless. Thanks for the negativity guys.

Why are you working so hard to build a straw man? Do you think we are debating you? Do you think that we are suddenly going to agree with your devaluation of marriage as being irrelevant? You came to a website called "Marriage Builders". What did you think you would hear?

So it's ok for you to make negative comments about other peoples marriages but not ok to state a true fact about your relationship?

This is ridic. Im not saying hey you suck for being married, im saying getting married isnt the end all solution or direct reflection of being more open to solve problems. Youre married thats great im happy for yall. Geez.

Did someone say "getting married is the end all solution?" I believe I have missed that! Please point me to that post.

P.s I can see that brawling is your typical approach to communication and I wonder how that's working out for you?

Hey are you vegan? I used to be vegan and vegans just want to argue ive learned just to hear themselves. Dude im not even fighting you or refuting what youre saying. This is like me starting to develop lung cancer from smoking and its my fault yes and ive already said im going to quit smoking yet you guys keep calling me a degenerate smoker. Wtf. But ok.

You are still fighting!!

You seem very conflicted halpme.
On one hand you say marriage is of no value and then on the other that it should only be done once (btw....there is no guarantee even under the perfect circumstances that this will happen for a couple, even one who waited for the 'right' time to do it)

You also are arguing how it is meaningless and then saying you are busy being the perfect wifey (an aside to that being that you are not married nor an actual wife)

I don't post this to further agitate you but to hopefully point out your conflict which you need to work through.

You have a lot invested in how it is that you are living with a man who you have pretended to be married to but are not married to. Fact.

Have you thought about writing the Harleys?

Email your questions to Joyce Harley at mbradio@marriagebuilders.com. When your email question is chosen to be answered on the radio show, you will be notified by email directing you to listen to the rebroadcast. If you would like to consider being a caller, include your telephone number. You will be called by us to explain the procedure to you. Every caller will receive a complementary book by Dr. Harley that addresses their question.

We really want to help you. The issue is that the way out of your current problems doesn't involve solving your relationship conflicts individually. Rather, it involves changing your relationship dynamics. As long as you are both renters (and occasionally freeloaders), you will fight like renters.

Please read this linked article from the Marriage Builders website. This article addresses the perils of marriages derived from renter relationships. It emphasizes the importance of the Policy of Joint Agreement in overcoming these liabilities. Tell us what you think after reading this.

I presume by now, that you have finished listening to the Love Busters audio book.

Did you follow through reading or listening to the Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders book that was strongly recommended?

Also, i hope that you took the time to read the very insightful link that Mr. Eureka posted in the previous post.

What is your opinion now, if you actually did follow through with what you said you would do?

How do you see your relationship as compared to the descriptions in B, R & F?

Also, Love Busters is Not just a one time read. It takes vigilance and daily practice.

At your most recent posting time, you were doing things sacrificially in hopes that things would turn around. How long can you maintain sacrificing if there is no POJA, Policy Of Joint Agreement?

I hope you are thinking about things and learning from Dr. Harley's experiences.

There is an excellent broadcast on MB Radio today, if you happen to see this post before noon tomorrow. It deals with the misconception of the stages of romantic love. If you follow Dr. Harley's wisdom, then you will not have to endure a dying and fizzling out relationship, because the two of you can continue to make it thrive and become Buyers.

LTL