***EDIT***

ThslsWhtlmFtngFr,

Is it possible you are suffering from postpartum depression? If so, that might be a cause of your lack of care and concern.

I am not sure why you can't PM? I tried to send you my email, but I guess you can't do that.

Roughrock18, No unfortunately not.

Loyal2afault, I don't believe it's post-partum. But it's possible. I'll mention it to my doctor. Thank you for the suggestion.

It would be inappropriate for you two, a BW and BH, especially one of whom is fantasizing of having an affair of their own, to be PM'ing each other. Please watch your boundaries.

SusieQ, this is exactly what I was thinking. MB facilitating an arena for affairs to happen would be a pretty big conflict of interest! lol Also, I got ahold of JustUss and he/she said no one on the forums has access to personal messages.

It is worth checking out. You are a prime candidate given you recently gave birth and you are dealing with the stress of your husband's transgressions. Are you eating and sleeping well?

I can see why that is a policy, because I have always had very good boundaries around women, and I have always been faithful to my wife. Because of the vulnerable state that I am in right now after all that I have been through, when I read her 1st post about how much she just wanted to feel wanted again, I couldn't help but relate. I wanted to talk to her so bad, I haven't stopped thinking about it for a couple days. Do you know how bad I want to feel needed and wanted right now. I am so tired of hurting. I just want to feel normal again.
That is why I wanted to talk to her. It would feel so good to talk to someone that felt the same way I do. She seemed beautiful in my mind. Why do husbands and wives hurt each other. Why do we have to suffer, because of a decision someone else makes. I hope someday I can feel safe again.
That being said, I understand that contact between two already vulnerable people, would not be a good idea.

Sir, just stay focused on the tasks at hand.
Following Dr. Harley's methods for killing affairs and recovering from them needs to be your mission.

If you need inspiration, watch a good movie but don't cry on a woman's shoulders because that would just be heaping fuel on the fire.

That is EXACTLY how affairs start. You do not have good boundaries around women.

Prisca,
I completely agree with you. I have never had those thoughts in my marriage, and I mean never. That is why a couple days ago, I talked to my wife, and told her that I was having thoughts like that, and that I need to stay open with her. Later in our conversation, she said that if she would have come to me and been open with me about when she was having thoughts about texting that other man, none of this would have happened. It turned out to be a very good conversation, and it goes right along with one of Dr. Harley's articles that I read the other day, where a wife started having an attraction for her husbands friend, and Dr. Harley said whenever you feel an attraction for someone of the opposite sex, that you need to immediately tell your spouse. That is why I talked to my wife about it. I think if more couples would go to there spouses when they were having thoughts like this, a lot of affairs could be prevented.
That being said, I have always had very good boundaries around women, especially in the work place. Sometimes even to the point of being down right rude when a woman would try and start conversations with me. So I recognize the vulnerable state that I am in right now, after going through 8 months of emotional hell. I apologize for not recognizing the danger of contacting another person that was going through the same thing. It was not smart.