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Well, at least she knows what kind of man she is married to, except they're not really married, right?
I fervently wish that there had been wide exposure of my H's OW's previous affairs (at least three that her husband knew about). My H had no clue and thought he was in "luv" with a "wonderful woman", not someone who serially cheated on her husband. When I exposed the affair to their workplace, H felt badly that OW was ostracized, but I felt good that other co-workers knew what a dangerous woman she was. And my H left his workplace within three months of my finding out about the affair.
Please continue to post. You are now on the affair rollercoaster with more "UPS and DOWNS" that you could ever imagine. The conditions that allowed the affair to occur need to be eliminated. Has that happened yet?
AM
BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
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The conditions that led to the affair have been eliminated. The biggest being me. It was my neglect and lovebusters that opened the door. I have met the former and conquered the latter. To say I am a Greek god in her eyes, complete with shield made of pure gold, would be an understatement:) I only wrote that because she's reading my posts
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Go back to your own thread and leave this victim alone.
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Sorry, I have no time for stupid stuff this evening.
AM
BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
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Sorry. The conditions have been eliminated. My Ww and I have used SAA to fairly good effect. We are doing recovery and have a long way to go but I do not doubt our future is bright. I have always felt from the beginning that we could fix this with Dr Harley's plan. I do appreciate so much how everyone is so supportive and generous with their time. We may seem flip but my wife and I are very upbeat people. Always have been and I'm sure we always will be. Heck, we got married on April Fools day, on purpose.
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Melody, please be a little more supportive as she works to meet my needs and restore our marriage. No thanks, Drew. I have little patience for fogged out way wards and support them by NOT validating their fogginess. Even so, I don't have the time to support you or your wife as my time here is very limited. It looks like you are getting some great help, though.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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PS, guys think long and hard about Cheaterville. The OM's W was dragged into the site by a third party who recognized him and it compounded her pain besides adding shame. She really is innocent I would suggest that it was the AFFAIR that caused the OMW pain. Let's not blame the wrong thing. You need to keep in mind that Dr. Harley recommends exposure on those sites. It is very therapeutic.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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PS, guys think long and hard about Cheaterville. The OM's W was dragged into the site by a third party who recognized him and it compounded her pain besidres adding shame. She really is innocent Have you listened to what Dr. Harley himself recommends about these sites? Shesahomewrecker.com
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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The conditions that led to the affair have been eliminated. The biggest being me. It was my neglect and lovebusters that opened the door. The biggest condition that leads to affairs is poor boundaries around the opposite sex. She would have still had an affair even if you met her needs 100%. So the conditions that led to the affair must be eliminated. Meeting her needs might make an affair less tempting, but she will still have affairs if she continues to maintain loose boundaries.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Go back to your own thread and leave this victim alone. This is funny to you?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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The conditions that led to the affair have been eliminated. The biggest being me. It was my neglect and lovebusters that opened the door. � No Sir, You Are Incorrect!!! Your Marriage was Not Affair Proofed, Your Wife ALLOWED Someone Else to meet Her emotional and other needs, along with having a view that starting up a familiar opposite sex "friendship" was under her control.. The steps to Survive And Thrive after an affair REQUIRE Extraordinary Precations be implemented for life. You could have been the best and most supportive husband in the world, yet once she allowed Another Man to make Love Bank Deposits into her account, your actions are disregarded and useless. Yes, you can and SHOULD improve your own LB Deposits and Eliminate ALL Love Busters, but once a spouse goes Wayward, it really doesn't matter how well you meet her needs. That depository is CLOSED from you being able to make fruitful deposits. LTL
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His wife hasn't even changed her phone # and the OM just contacted her. So no, this marriage is not in the least affair proofed.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I exposed him to her. She was mortified her name ended up on his cheaterville post
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I exposed him to her. She was mortified her name ended up on his cheaterville post So the problem is that you - for some bizarre reason - put her name on cheaterville. That is not the fault of this forum, but your fault. You seem to have made a lot of exposure mistakes but don't want to take the blame. For example, no one told you to put your wife on cheaterville. You were told to put the OM on there. And no one told you to put the OM's girlfriends name there. Are you accountable for any of that?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I have not said my marriage is affair proofed. I am pointing out the fact that my wife has ended all contact, is working recovery and could use your guidance. She's here so maybe stop killing her and start assisting her.
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Melody, I have said I did not do exposure correctly. Adding the OM didn't include his girlfriend. A third party recognized him and added her name. Along with pain of learning her man had an affair she suffered the shame of having her name included on that sight. Cheaterville mortified her
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Melody, why are you so angry? Why don't you take a few hours and go on a date with your cute husband?
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Melody, why are you so angry? Why don't you take a few hours and go on a date with your cute husband? I just came back from a hot date with my cute husband.  Why do you sound so defensive?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Melody, I have said I did not do exposure correctly. Adding the OM didn't include his girlfriend. A third party recognized him and added her name. Along with pain of learning her man had an affair she suffered the shame of having her name included on that sight. Cheaterville mortified her Why did you expose your WW on cheaterville when no one on the board recommended that? It was only recommended for you to post OM?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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