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Axslinger,

You wrote, WW now texting her sibs claiming I'm lying about her.

So WW is desperately trying to cover her lies with more lies, and a week from now she will not remember those lies and will tell her sibs different lies.

You can see how exposure causes an affair to unravel at high speed, and why you have to tell the story first.

When you put OM on cheaterville hit (F5) to reload your browser and increase the number of "views" he gets.

God Bless
Gamma


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Originally Posted by axslinger85
WW now texting her sibs claiming I'm lying about her.

And keep in mind, you don't need her admission. Most way wards do deny the truth.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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It now gives me the option but I think OM has marked my account as a spammer or something. I'd waited overnight before I tried and still no dice.

On WW, I didn't really have any more evidence than I stated. I was hoping PI could tie this all together but after WW disappeared from her regular schedule yesterday, I followed the advice on here. I told PI to hang back until Friday so he's not burning up my retainer trying to drive all over the place and find her. Him waiting until Sunday to try and GPS her has not been good to us.

Her family seems to understand that she's hiding something and if she's not, why not come out of hiding?

She's going to be caught in a catch-22 I think because while I'm sure my tracking of her car has gotten filtered back to her through her family, it's not like she can just decide not to come to work anymore. PI knows where she works, when she's scheduled, and what she looks like, as well as OM (I have pics of him too).


Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
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D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

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axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

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Originally Posted by axslinger85
It now gives me the option but I think OM has marked my account as a spammer or something. I'd waited overnight before I tried and still no dice.

He can't do that. Just keep trying and you should be able to get through. Even if you have to set up a new account, you need to do this. You must expose to his family and I don't think you got through before, do you?

Quote
On WW, I didn't really have any more evidence than I stated.

I think it would be a good idea to pretend like you have more evidence than you do. You KNOW she is living there with the minimal evidence you do have.

Even so, I believe most people will believe you.

Did you expose the affair at work?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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It is REAL important that you expose to the OM's contacts so don't give up! Exposing to his family, friends and workplace is likely to run this RAT off. You need to drive this dirtbag AWAY.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by MelodyLane
Originally Posted by axslinger85
It now gives me the option but I think OM has marked my account as a spammer or something. I'd waited overnight before I tried and still no dice.

He can't do that. Just keep trying and you should be able to get through. Even if you have to set up a new account, you need to do this. You must expose to his family and I don't think you got through before, do you?

Quote
On WW, I didn't really have any more evidence than I stated.

I think it would be a good idea to pretend like you have more evidence than you do. You KNOW she is living there with the minimal evidence you do have.

Even so, I believe most people will believe you.

Did you expose the affair at work?

On FB, I won't give up. I think he's more likely to buckle than she is and I intend to keep the pressure on him any way I can until the A is dead. He's a lot more vulnerable in that regard because he has more visibility.

Her parents both texted me this morning and I think they've just accepted what has happened. Very supportive, and I think they've read between the lines and put it all together. It's just the sibs who are mixed up, and one of them is married and I think also realizes the truth.

Also I recommended MIL buy and read SAA, and she was talking to me about what she's gleaned from it about our situation which is very encouraging.

On saying I have more than I have....I'm a terrible liar. The worst.

When I had caught WW talking to OM a few weeks ago, she'd mentioned getting him a job at her employer (she now works for a hotel...her "job" at OM's business never materialized)...I tasked the PI with finding out where he works, I intend to do workplace exposure if possible. The hotel is a Fortune 500 co, I'm sure they will have a policy. Right now it appears he's still running his stand at special events, not sure where else he draws income. WW didn't spring the separation announcement until she had 2 jobs so I'm curious if he has financial problems.

Last edited by axslinger85; 10/07/14 12:35 PM.

Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
D-day: 10/5/2014
D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

Noted, I'll be more specific. I've been trying to toe this line between exposing as much as I can about OM without exposing too much about WW in the public view. Am I thinking about that right?


Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
D-day: 10/5/2014
D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

My story
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Originally Posted by MelodyLane
Originally Posted by axslinger85
It now gives me the option but I think OM has marked my account as a spammer or something. I'd waited overnight before I tried and still no dice.

He can't do that. Just keep trying and you should be able to get through. Even if you have to set up a new account, you need to do this. You must expose to his family and I don't think you got through before, do you?

Try a different computer or set up a new profile for yourself. It doesn't make any sense that this wouldn't work for you and that the messages wouldn't be in your sent folder.

The other man wouldn't have marked you as spam because from what you have said NONE of your messages went thru.

Keep trying. Make it happen! It is THAT important!!


Last edited by SusieQ; 10/07/14 12:45 PM.

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Originally Posted by axslinger85
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

Noted, I'll be more specific. I've been trying to toe this line between exposing as much as I can about OM without exposing too much about WW in the public view. Am I thinking about that right?

You need to be very clear that they are having an active affair.
Posting that he makes good waffles and texts your wife all the time is a far cry from posting 'He started an affair with my wife which has devastated our marriage"

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If you keep having problems with FB I can show you how to get around the FB messages and send them very easily.
Have you been able to send the messages or do you need help?

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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Originally Posted by axslinger85
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

Noted, I'll be more specific. I've been trying to toe this line between exposing as much as I can about OM without exposing too much about WW in the public view. Am I thinking about that right?

You need to be very clear that they are having an active affair.
Posting that he makes good waffles and texts your wife all the time is a far cry from posting 'He started an affair with my wife which has devastated our marriage"

I saw in your post something about the OM preying on your W while she was weak/vulnerable. I posted to you about this earlier and I don't think you responded.

I would just get that out of your head and I wouldn't try painting her as a victim in your exposures or trying to get OM to take the brunt of the fall vs your WW.


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Originally Posted by axslinger85
[
Her parents both texted me this morning and I think they've just accepted what has happened. Very supportive, and I think they've read between the lines and put it all together. It's just the sibs who are mixed up, and one of them is married and I think also realizes the truth.

That is great, but I want to make sure you are drawing a CLEAR LINE in your narration. for example, you should be saying "wife is having an affair with Joe Dirtbag and moved in with him 2 weeks ago." Versus, vague language like "she moved out and the GPS puts her a block from his house and I have this voicemail."

Don't just leave it to people to figure out on their own. State up front that she is having an affair and is staying at OM's.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Originally Posted by axslinger85
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

Noted, I'll be more specific. I've been trying to toe this line between exposing as much as I can about OM without exposing too much about WW in the public view. Am I thinking about that right?

You need to be very clear that they are having an active affair.
Posting that he makes good waffles and texts your wife all the time is a far cry from posting 'He started an affair with my wife which has devastated our marriage"

I thought the bit about calling him a sociopathic homewrecker was succinct but I get what you're saying. I'll edit it.


Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
D-day: 10/5/2014
D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

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In other words, don't be ambiguous about the truth. That is a rookie mistake. You have enough evidence for any rational person to rightly conclude that a) she is having an affair with OM and b) has moved in with him. Court verdicts are decided on LESS evidence than that!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by SusieQ
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Originally Posted by axslinger85
Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
axslinger,

I read your exposure on Cheaterville.
I dont think you were clear enough and I hope your FB exposure is more clear.
You should go back and edit the posting and clearly state: "This man is carrying on an affair with my wife"

Noted, I'll be more specific. I've been trying to toe this line between exposing as much as I can about OM without exposing too much about WW in the public view. Am I thinking about that right?

You need to be very clear that they are having an active affair.
Posting that he makes good waffles and texts your wife all the time is a far cry from posting 'He started an affair with my wife which has devastated our marriage"

I saw in your post something about the OM preying on your W while she was weak/vulnerable. I posted to you about this earlier and I don't think you responded.

I would just get that out of your head and I wouldn't try painting her as a victim in your exposures or trying to get OM to take the brunt of the fall vs your WW.

Just because I'm saying that to OM to make him feel like a POS doesn't mean I believe it's the absolute truth. Lack of OS boundaries for WW is what started this (along with me not meeting her ENs), I'm keenly aware of that. I have no intention of shouldering this on OM when it comes to reconciliation with WW.


Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
D-day: 10/5/2014
D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

My story
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Originally Posted by axslinger85
Just because I'm saying that to OM to make him feel like a POS doesn't mean I believe it's the absolute truth. Lack of OS boundaries for WW is what started this (along with me not meeting her ENs), I'm keenly aware of that. I have no intention of shouldering this on OM when it comes to reconciliation with WW.

I think susie was referring to your Cheaterville exposure, where you explained your wife was "going through some rough times in her life"

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Originally Posted by Jedi_Knight
Originally Posted by axslinger85
Just because I'm saying that to OM to make him feel like a POS doesn't mean I believe it's the absolute truth. Lack of OS boundaries for WW is what started this (along with me not meeting her ENs), I'm keenly aware of that. I have no intention of shouldering this on OM when it comes to reconciliation with WW.

I think susie was referring to your Cheaterville exposure, where you explained your wife was "going through some rough times in her life"

Exactly. VS that she moved in with him.


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How is it helpful to the purpose Cheaterville post to paint my wife as complicit and willing? Isn't the point to make OM look bad?


Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders"
2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more.

When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29
Married: 7 years
Together: 8 years
D-day: 10/5/2014
D filed: 1/22/2015
D Final: 6/4/2015

My story
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Originally Posted by axslinger85
How is it helpful to the purpose Cheaterville post to paint my wife as complicit and willing? Isn't the point to make OM look bad?

Sir, you dont have to name her by name but she obviously isnt incompetent or forcefully kidnapped by him

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