I listened to those last night. I don't know that it is the biggest problem with my situation. Not that it's not a factor, but there were other things that caused this outcome.

How soon after the live broadcast is the show available? I can't get the live show to play correctly so I have to listen a day behind.

Do you mean when do they show up in the archives? It depends, they are over a week behind right now.

Did you write Dr Harley?

No time yet. I want to write a well-thought-out email that isn't too verbose.

You know you only have to give him highlights, correct?

Didn't Jedi_knight draft an example letter in your thread?

Yes, here it is.

What's wrong with this ^^^^? Why not use it?

That letter is factually incomplete

Then fix it and send it off.

Got a voicemail from my xFIL that was rather interesting. The xW's sister and her family and her parents were supposed to come out for Thanksgiving, but suddenly plans changed and now they aren't. I just found out why. xW doesn't want her father to come out unless he plays nice with POSOM, which he is not about to do. He is on the side of the Bible and what is right, and he has told me a number of times that he will never accept him, even if she marries him. I think her sister is getting on board with that mindset also, because the last couple times they got together, she ended up being nothing more than a babysitter to my kids while the POSOM and xW went off and did something (last time it was an NFL game the whole day).

On the one hand I am glad to see them FINALLY putting their money where there mouth has been and acting like the Christians they profess to be. On the other hand, it seems like my xW is still deep within the fog after almost 3 years and isn't about to come out.

I made a $100 bet with my buddy that the xW is engaged by New Years Day. I don't know if writing an email to Dr. Harley is worth the effort right now. Having listened to the rebroadcasts lately, it seems he is being quite the opponent of divorce.

I meant to say "proponent of divorce".

Sir just send him the email.

At the risk of sounding ignorant, what is the email address again? I want to make sure I have the right one.

I will be spending turkey day home alone and might work up enough gumption to write. if I do, I know it will be a very long email.

to Joyce Harley at mbradio@marriagebuilders.com

Well, I haven't had time to write yet (This is how busy I am). I am at work and listening to MB radio and thought I'd post an account of something strange that happened over the weekend.

When the xW and I were married, we had a dog that she got as a puppy just before the wedding. I don't know if I mentioned that he had been sick and had to be put down a few months ago. It wsa a very sad day for all and I think she took it hard.

After we got a house, we decided to adopt a companion for our dog, and we found a female about the same age. They were best friends and it turned out to be a good thing. Well, the female is now terminal with bone cancer and has maybe a few months at best.

About 5 years or so after our wedding, my xW decided that we should help with a rescue organization for the breed of dog that we had. So we fostered a male for a couple months and when it came time to adopt him out, my xW couldn't stand to see hom go, so we kept him. Three dogs. Well, this one, who is much younger than the other two, got sick on Saturday and she took him to the vet to find out that he has something seriously wrong and may not be around much longer. Enter the strangeness:

She starts texting me like crazy, obviously upset, asking me to help her pay for all these vet bills. SHe complained that she has no money and might not be able to pay her mortgage, etc. She apparently starts texting her sister as well, who texts her mom, who then starts texting ME, trying to GUILT me into paying my xW for the vet bills. Oh, I go to church, I should do what's right, the Bible says this, the Bible says that, yadda yadda. Never mind that her daughter committed adultery and divorced me. The judge gave her everything except what I had with me, and slapped me with child support to boot.

Oh, the things I COULD have said and felt like saying.

But I'm not a monster, and refrain from all that now. What did I tell my xW? The truth, as I always have:

I can help as much as possible, but I have to pay this month's bills (which I am going to do today) and I need to see what my account looks like when I'm done. Then I can make a determination as to how much I can contribute. It's a real straightforward answer and it's true. But does that fly with these women? Nope. It's the same as it's always been - I need to wave my magic wand and make things all better. But WHY?? SHE DIVORCED ME.

Technically, the dogs are not my problem any more. She made her choices and now she's bitching because she's broke. Hey, I guess I shouldn't pay any attention to those two weekends she took off of work in the last month (Saturdays are her $$$$ days) to go to an NFL game, and to White Sands with the POSOM. Where is HIS wallet when the dogs get sick? I thought he "loved him some white girl" as he racistly states on his FB page.

Sorry for the tone. Yes, I am a bit peeved at her mother's nagging me and the fact that the xW is hitting me up for money when she should know better, but I am concerned for the dog.

On the other hand, I am real curious as to why she is involving me in this matter, since she is "at peace" with her decision and doesn't involve me in any other matters.

Well nuts. She had the dog put down that night. Presumably because I didn't pledge hundreds of dollars. Looks like I'm the bad guy again.

She made the decision for the dog and it is never an easy one to make.
Don't get sucked into the drama of having the dog's illness/condition aimed at you.

As you said, you dog was not technically your financial concern.

If anyone harps on the situation, simply say "It is a shame that Fido came down with that condition. Thankfully he didn't suffer long."

Wow, she certainly feels very entitled, doesn't she? I think you played it well.

You know her? She has been that way since we got married. I could give you a hundred examples.

Finally have two minutes to post. Interesting, I had the girls all last weekend (we alternate Sundays), yet she somehow assumed that I would have them THIS weekend too. No asking, no mention whatsoever. She pulls this crap ALL the time, too. I can always tell when she is going to come up with some fake excuse when she plans on springing it on me because she packs extra clothes for them. I swear she thinks I am stupid. She certainly treats me that way.

Sir, if you are able to watch the girls then do so.
It could be a blessing to you.

Extra time with your daughters is crap? When I was being shuttled off from house to house with my brother I always thought extra time with my dad was great, seeing as how my mother was a fogged out wayward. Once I was with him fulltime and barely got to see my brother, I REALLY thought it was great if we could get any extra time with my brother at all.